But is that an inherent difference or is it the result of the average boy playing more FPS than the average girl?
[RD] I'm transitioning. If you've ever been confused about the T in LGBT, ask me anything
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But is that an inherent difference or is it the result of the average boy playing more FPS than the average girl?
dusters
Emperor
The reaction time difference is approx 20ms, as in miliseconds. Very small, but still.
The "not-so-trustable" source https://www.reddit.com/r/GirlGamers/comments/3c1q1o/gametheory_argues_we_females_have_slower/
The "not-so-trustable" source https://www.reddit.com/r/GirlGamers/comments/3c1q1o/gametheory_argues_we_females_have_slower/
There was also a study that showed that while men were slightly faster women were more accurate. Again, I think the reason so many FPS champions are male is because men are much more likely to play FPS games, if there are ten times as many men who play FPS games than women the ratio for champions is quite possibly be more lopsided than that due to statistical outliers.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
Firstly, I disagree with this presumption because individualism. At best, you can say the sexes correlate to certain patterns, but that means nothing to an individual person. I'm Megan, not a "woman on average".
To be honest I'm not sure if its either sexist or philosophical. My mind is thinking something else entirely.
Not seeing the difference TBH. My answer still stands.
I'm definitely better informed, so I appreciate you taking the time to answer our questions - even (especially?) the stupid or ill-worded ones.
Yay its working.
It's really so good to hear that I'm positively affecting someone. I actually got in a minor spat with one of my IOT friends earlier this morning, who was concerned that I was wasting my time and not accomplishing anything. This is evidence to the contrary.
No, it makes total sense. It's a cultural shock that I'm sure most people aren't used too. I see the best way to fight bigotry, really any form of bigotry, is to try to be a positive example and engage with people. It's hard to discriminate against something when your friend/child/whatever is x. Doesn't work with everyone though.
Only trans people I know are on CFC, so I don't get too much exposure to normal trans people (as opposed to crazy people on TV, etc). So on that note, no, you're not talking too much about it. In fact, I'd rather like regular reminders about the topic, whenever you feel you want to post something.
I'll keep that in mind if I ever find the urge to talk about something that comes up in my or the trans world. I don't want to turn this into trans politics discussion obviously, but there was some things I did want to share to you guys that I ended up not because I didn't because I didn't think that was the purpose of an ask a.
I have some advice for you then. One person on IOT was, unintentionally, having that same problem towards me. What he did to alleviate it was actually to just refer to me as Omega exclusively (and if he told me I'd never had noticed, its pretty natural); no pronouns at all. That unlearns the association you get from a name and a particular gender, and from there you could switch to using she and her.
Honestly I'm such a ******** my IOT friends are constantly exposed to the fact I'm female every day
Spoiler Me irl :
Actually with some people I have the opposite reaction; they can't even remember sometimes I am a /trans/woman. Which is really sweet, except for when I want to talk about my trans issues and I don't want to kill their perception of me as female. Hell, there was a brief period where I masqueraded as a cisgender woman here and you guys all bought it ;3
THIS. THIS. THIS.
Social conditioning, not biology, is the reason why we have gender roles. There is no reason why women are universally held to a lower standard to men in every athletic and intellectual competition ever, except for the fact that women are simply expected to be inferior. Women are socially held back from honing their skills due to social norms, and therefore it creates this feedback loop where women are considered inferior at that task, and then they segregate the activity, and then no one cares about the womens' events because they're amateur level compared to the mens'
If professional sports were coed, I'd think you'd see more successful female athletes. They'd be in a better culture to develop than the present situation.
TBH, gametheroy uses a lot of shoddy science sometimes to either be entertaining or to fit the conclusion he wants. I still remember where he "proved" Pyro from TF2 is a gay male using a lot of steotypes and pseudoscience. And the episodes that rely less on actual science and more on interpretation, like the DKC or Punch Out episodes, tend to be the most entertaining ones anyways but I digress.
Take his show as entertainment, not as educational. It's not a science show.
dusters
Emperor
Ah, I see your stance. if possible, don't leave it on a cliff hanger "My mind is thinking something else entirely.", name it
I was genuinely thinking if you knew about anthropology side of transgender, if you knew in what professions those people tend to work/have worked in the past etc.
My personal experience - 2 mtf and 3 ftm, all five of them graduated as lawyers. Probably to fight the system, although at 18 you aren't/wouldn't be so naive I guess. I know like 10 more transgender people from Latvia who aren't lawyers. They work in different fields, but it's still interesting.
I guess that "Don't box me in, I'm an individual and individuals have rights" works in a 1st world countries with a long history of human rights. In Eastern Europe, most countries have had Pride events only for past 8-10 years. We are in a totally different phase, maybe like 50s in USA.
So here if you are trans and you don't try to fit in, everyone ignores you, nobody cares and the only thing you can do is emmigrate.
I was genuinely thinking if you knew about anthropology side of transgender, if you knew in what professions those people tend to work/have worked in the past etc.
My personal experience - 2 mtf and 3 ftm, all five of them graduated as lawyers. Probably to fight the system, although at 18 you aren't/wouldn't be so naive I guess. I know like 10 more transgender people from Latvia who aren't lawyers. They work in different fields, but it's still interesting.
I guess that "Don't box me in, I'm an individual and individuals have rights" works in a 1st world countries with a long history of human rights. In Eastern Europe, most countries have had Pride events only for past 8-10 years. We are in a totally different phase, maybe like 50s in USA.
So here if you are trans and you don't try to fit in, everyone ignores you, nobody cares and the only thing you can do is emmigrate.
I'm definitely better informed, so I appreciate you taking the time to answer our questions - even (especially?) the stupid or ill-worded ones.
I also find it easier to sympathise with you now, though honestly, while I am intellectually okay with the whole trans-issue, I'll still need a few more years to adjust emotionally, if that makes any sense.
Well, it took me more than a decade to adjust emotionally to the idea, so yes, it makes sense.
That's a tricky question. In general, yes, people struggle a bit. That doesn't mean misgendering is not a problem. When people slip up, it stings because I totally can relate to how they made that mistake. The less someone is willing to work on getting name and pronouns correct, the less I am going to want interact with them.
No.
My whole existence is sorta built on the idea that most ideas of gender are arbitrary so it'd be weird if I suddenly regressed in a field.
I'm a month late to the party, but props to you contre and Omega for creating/maintaining this thread. And more to the point, I hope that living as the right gender brings you peace. Thirdly, contre you look cute in those pics.
It has always seemed to me that transwomen have embraced even the bits of womanhood that ciswomen seem to typically find annoying - menstruation, needing to wear a bra, stupid men acting stupid, etc. Aside from wondering if either of you agree with this, I was wondering how far it goes - one example of the far end of it would be getting paid less for really the same job, and what has to be the same knowledge/experience/competence level because HRT certainly doesn't change that. And do you feel more vulnerable as a woman (well, as no longer presenting as a male) in dangerous neighborhoods, or find that you're taken less seriously in conversations or any similar stereotypical situations of that sort?
It has always seemed to me that transwomen have embraced even the bits of womanhood that ciswomen seem to typically find annoying - menstruation, needing to wear a bra, stupid men acting stupid, etc. Aside from wondering if either of you agree with this, I was wondering how far it goes - one example of the far end of it would be getting paid less for really the same job, and what has to be the same knowledge/experience/competence level because HRT certainly doesn't change that. And do you feel more vulnerable as a woman (well, as no longer presenting as a male) in dangerous neighborhoods, or find that you're taken less seriously in conversations or any similar stereotypical situations of that sort?
Thank you ^.^
We do embrace those things because they're affirming irritations. It's the type of irritation I should have and that's a mitigating thought. I wouldn't want every experience cis-women have, though. A lot of transgender people would consider it an improvement to be paid less for the same job, because they'd have jobs. The transgender unemployment rate is abysmal. At least three times the provincial rate, with only a plurality of us employed full time. And this is a progressive area of the world. It's a nasty confluence of mental health, substance abuse and discrimination.
I feel vulnerable in new places and I avoid going anywhere alone unless I've scoped it out with someone first, or it's a narrow task (goto place, do thing, return home). On the other hand, I live in a (Canadian version of a) dangerous neighbourhood and I feel comfortable walking my dog at 2 am.
We do embrace those things because they're affirming irritations. It's the type of irritation I should have and that's a mitigating thought. I wouldn't want every experience cis-women have, though. A lot of transgender people would consider it an improvement to be paid less for the same job, because they'd have jobs. The transgender unemployment rate is abysmal. At least three times the provincial rate, with only a plurality of us employed full time. And this is a progressive area of the world. It's a nasty confluence of mental health, substance abuse and discrimination.
I feel vulnerable in new places and I avoid going anywhere alone unless I've scoped it out with someone first, or it's a narrow task (goto place, do thing, return home). On the other hand, I live in a (Canadian version of a) dangerous neighbourhood and I feel comfortable walking my dog at 2 am.
Cheezy the Wiz
Socialist In A Hurry
When in doubt, ask in a way that doesn't challenge their identification. Don't ask "what are you" but ask "what pronouns do you use?" Most of the time that's really enough info, but if you absolutely MUST know for whatever reason what their actual gender is, then straightforward "what is your gender" is probably best.
I mean really, we just want to be treated like people and go about our day, and not singled out as freaks or as anything special. If we're appearing in a political capacity then that's typically when we want our identity as trans to "matter" but for the most part just treat us how we look like we're trying to be present, and if you aren't sure how to address us, then just ask what our pronouns are without dwelling on the "OMG YOU'RE TRANS" thing.
So long as people demonstrate a willingness to learn and correct themselves, many trans people are okay with this. We understand that it's a process and that it doesn't happen overnight. However, it would be a nice gesture of solidarity if you did your best to get the pronouns and names down at least.
And also, on that note: if you screw up, don't self-flagellate. Doing so redirects the issue to be about you. Just a simple apology or even just a quick correction if you catch it fast enough. Again, a lot of trans people really don't like the idea of the fact that they're trans being broadcast to the world; it's a reminder that we're different, and given the high rates of anti-trans violence, it can in some situations actually place us in more danger.
Yes.
Given the highly questionable nature of knowing what a given person's hormonal balance actually is (it's not often based on genitalia), I have problems with statements like this. There's no question that Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) forces this balance in the direction you want, but like, there isn't just "male brain" and "female brain." In fact the very idea of meaningful differences in the brains based on gender is some pretty ancient patriarchal hogwash. Best to avoid it entirely. But if you mean differences in the brains in the area of, say, gender dysphoria and self-actualization, then yeah, hormones can play a huge part in changing the brain's chemistry for the better.
I have not.
This touches on an essential part of gender, though: gender roles are primarily told through sub-conscious messages as part of cultural norms, and this is why socialization based on assigned gender doesn't stop the creation of transgender people. We didn't "become" the opposite gender, we already were it and the confusion and anxiety of transgender youth arises from this dissonance. We are told that we are one thing, but in reality we are not, but we don't really have the tools to understand this fact, so it results in us hating ourselves for never adequately measuring up to our assigned gender, and thinking that something must be defective in us as a result.
Nonetheless, in children you will see their real gender break through if given the chance to assert itself: boys will play with girls' toys or choose girl characters to play; girls will dress in boys' clothes or want short haircuts, and might want to be called by a boy's name. For example, both my partner and I are genderfluid: she went through a period for years as a child where she insisted on being called a boy's name; I put on my sister's clothes when she wasn't home and tried to make myself look more feminine in the mirror. In both cases we concluded that something must be wrong with us, because neither of us had ever heard of anyone like us, and so we repressed it for a long time.
Some people figure it out; I think of them as the vanguard. They were the first to "come out," the people whose dysphoria was unbearably strong and who had the self-understanding and perspective to understand and untie the mind-[fudge] they had been subjected to. We owe them an enormous debt; today, knowledge of transgender issues and identity means that, for the first time, children are being identified as transgender *as children* and are being allowed to express their true genders instead of being forced to try and fit through a round hole as a square peg. They're being given access to hormone therapy before puberty and aren't growing up with the crushing depression and suicidal tendencies that older trans people have had to endure. And to be honest, it makes my cry with joy.
I come at this form the angle of Marxism-Leninism, so my angle will not be the same as others in this thread. However, the Revolutionary Alliance of Transgender People Against Capitalism (RATPAC) is focused on developing a critical theory of gender in conjunction with Marxism and communist politics, and the prevailing view among this crowd is that oppressed genders are like oppressed nationalities: a certain amount of reclamation of their identity is an essential part of their liberation. Just like, for example, the nationalism of nations oppressed by colonialism can play an important, liberatory role (think Frantz Fanon's "Black Skin, White Masks") in that they are standing up against an ideology that insists that they are inferior and they are saying "no, we are equals just like you, with an identity that we deserve to be proud of just like you are of yours!" that oppressed genders can, should, and do do much the same thing.
There are some confused feminists who try to tell us that we are "reinforcing gender when we should be trying to abolish it," but we see these people in the exact same way that we see people who say that "all nationalism is bad, because we are trying to abolish nation-states," and this ignores a basic right of people to celebrate themselves in ways not oppressive to others, and that the struggle of oppressed people to celebrate their oppressed identities and make them equal is an essential part of actually making them equal and free in the first place.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
Ah, I see your stance. if possible, don't leave it on a cliff hanger "My mind is thinking something else entirely.", name it
To be blunt, silly. I was trying to avoid outright saying that because I don't want to be rude but I want my message getting across more.
The stereotypical profession for transwomen is being a sex worker. How true that stereotype is, idk. I've personally never held a job in my life so I couldn't even say what I did. I'm not really a helpful source in that department sorry.
Law school is something I may be considering myself. I'm currently going for a political science/history double major, and in both respective fields, you really need some sort of post bachelor degree to stand out (unless I go straight into local politics, which is a real thing I'm seriously considering myself too). At this point I'm only a first year student so I have a lot if time to make my mind up.
If I did became a lawyer, My first choice would be to focus on constitutional law and that kind of stuff. In general, politics is my calling.
Firstly, that last sentence made my mind wander in a place that I probably shouldn't post about on here
On a more serious note, obviously I can't speak for him, but that does seem to correspond to what Tolni has confined about the status of LGBT issues in Bulgaria. If anything, Latvia sounds even better than Bulgaria since there seems to be more exposure to the LGBT movement in the public sphere (Tolni really gave me the impression that especially trans issues are simply just not mentioned in public discourse. I was such a cultural shock to him when I first met him)
I'm a month late to the party, but props to you contre and Omega for creating/maintaining this thread. And more to the point, I hope that living as the right gender brings you peace. Thirdly, contre you look cute in those pics.
Thank you and hopefully soon it will. Long way to go, but I'm trying.
Honestly, I think contre said it better than I possibly ever could. So I'm just going to quote what she said, like she's done in the past for some of her responses.
civvver
Deity
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I only read like the last few posts so sorry if this was already discussed. This is a long thread.
Everyone is posting all over facebook (which I'm not even on but no one will shut up about it) about the target decision to let people use whatever bathroom they want.
My question is, how do you view this situation and is it really kind of overblown on all fronts? Like if a transgender uses the women's room, how is anyone going to know anyway unless they follow that person into the stall? I don't understand why either side would to draw attention to it.
I guess what I'm saying is why is this proclamation by target even necessary? If you are dressed like your identified gender then wouldn't you kind of blend in anyway and it shouldn't be an issue?
Everyone is posting all over facebook (which I'm not even on but no one will shut up about it) about the target decision to let people use whatever bathroom they want.
My question is, how do you view this situation and is it really kind of overblown on all fronts? Like if a transgender uses the women's room, how is anyone going to know anyway unless they follow that person into the stall? I don't understand why either side would to draw attention to it.
I guess what I'm saying is why is this proclamation by target even necessary? If you are dressed like your identified gender then wouldn't you kind of blend in anyway and it shouldn't be an issue?
It's not like they held a press conference to announce that. They wanted a uniform policy for all their stores. When they clarified their rules, they were contacted by reporters to comment.
Not all transwomen pass all the time, in fact, plenty don't pass at all.
So, here's a question that might have already been asked but I'm late to the thread:
How long does it take you to transition? Is it kind of a consistent and linear process, or does it go faster or slower at the beginning or end of the time period?
How long does it take you to transition? Is it kind of a consistent and linear process, or does it go faster or slower at the beginning or end of the time period?
It's such a murky process that it's hard to pin down. In a simplified version, the clinical standard follows a pretty linear path.
Not all doctors will do HRT. Many cannot afford to see a doctor who will start HRT. Many doctors who will start HRT require one of two things: the patient has lived for some amount of time as the gender they identify as (I normally saw 3 months) or they've had a qualified mental health professional recommend the patient start HRT... and that'll also be at least 3 months of counseling. A few doctors, more in the US than here, practice Informed Consent and let the patient decide what to do. So if someone has access to an informed consent clinic, they can start HRT tomorrow. I had to wait 5 months (3 months therapist + 1 month referral for Endocrinologist + 1 month for various tests).
If your goal is SRS, it's going to be at least 24 (more like 36) months more from this point. That assumes you have access to the resources, but not enough to bribe unethical doctors. That 24 months breaks down roughly as follows. It will take a few months to stabilize your hormone levels. Once that is done the standard would be to allow HRT at least 1 year to work before considering SRS.* In practice, most professionals would want to see evidence that your body had finished responding to hormones or that you'd give it 2 years to do so. At this point you'll start doing preliminary work for a major surgical operation that includes month, at least, of recovery.
So to answer your question, a quick timeline would be three years for SRS, and an exceptional one two years, assuming access to the resources to meet that schedule. That's a big assumption.
*To skip that, you would really need to bribe someone or be an exceptional case. Surgeons require letters from qualified professionals before they'll do anything. Qualified is not an arbitrary term -- doctors (and insurers) need some confidence they're not going to get sued by someone who changes their mind, or that they have a good defense against such a lawsuit. It would be very very unusual for a qualified professional to sign off SRS before this point.
Cheezy the Wiz
Socialist In A Hurry
Exactly. If you know the genitals of someone else in the bathroom, you're the one doing something inappropriate.
I obviously think it's important to fight for the right of transgender people (and thus all people) to go to the bathroom wherever they feel comfortable.
If you don't want to poop next to a trans person, the go poop at home, which is what people who don't like public restrooms already do.
Borachio
Way past lunacy
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Public lavatories are a nightmare, however you look at it, imo.
Never mind the hygiene issue, I've very frequently encountered some very shady characters hanging around in them. And I've studiously avoided all eye-contact. Something I don't often find myself doing.
This has nothing to do with the issue at hand, I hasten to add. It's just an irrelevant thought that occurred to me.
Never mind the hygiene issue, I've very frequently encountered some very shady characters hanging around in them. And I've studiously avoided all eye-contact. Something I don't often find myself doing.
This has nothing to do with the issue at hand, I hasten to add. It's just an irrelevant thought that occurred to me.
Hygro
soundcloud.com/hygro/
They call that a mirror, Borachio.
Borachio
Way past lunacy
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What?
I must say I don't enjoy looking at myself in a mirror. Although I will do it to check for stray bits of foodage, and snotage, from time to time.
But I was talking about the people who seem to frequent public toilets for the purposes of picking up potential sexual partners. A very strange activity to my mind. And yet even George Michael got caught doing it. By a policeman! Though why the policeman played along, I'm sure I don't know.
I should add that I've never been bothered by any of these people myself. I guess they can tell by my body language that I'm not in market for such stuff.
I must say I don't enjoy looking at myself in a mirror. Although I will do it to check for stray bits of foodage, and snotage, from time to time.
But I was talking about the people who seem to frequent public toilets for the purposes of picking up potential sexual partners. A very strange activity to my mind. And yet even George Michael got caught doing it. By a policeman! Though why the policeman played along, I'm sure I don't know.
I should add that I've never been bothered by any of these people myself. I guess they can tell by my body language that I'm not in market for such stuff.
Would you like to ask a question?
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