Imagine a small metallic cube...

[SS-18 ICBM]

...that can you can hold in the palm of your hand. Its origin and mechanism of action is a mystery. It is the world's most powerful computer, but it is more than that. Its processing capacity is many orders of magnitude greater than today's supercomputers. It can store nearly limitless amounts of data. It can bypass all security measures. It has a user-friendly interface and a neural link so it can do exactly what you want it to do and find what you want it to find. At the same time, this device can interface and control any electric device on Earth, and a thousand miles beyond.
With it, you can see and hear nearly all. Just tell it to commandeer a military imaging satellite or a microphone in a secure complex. It can access and currently stores all knowledge and information known to man, and can monitor and gather information on nearly everything. Any electric device can be made to perform anything within their capability. It can do things like turning on the lights at home, or launching nuclear weapons. You can do things like download hundreds of gigabytes of songs for free, or sending entire nations back into the stone age.

So, aware of these new capabilities, what do you do?

 

[TheLastOne36]

Eat it. Yum.

 

[Bigfoot3814]

Probably put it in my pocket and run it through the washing machine by mistake.

 

[Zelig]

Experience porn in new ways.

 

[Perfection]

I would blow it up by asking it to try and understand the depth of love between Fifty and me.

 

[Yeekim]

That was a mighty complicated way to ask: "What would you do if you were almighty?"

 

[Bill3000]

Ram it into Megatron's chest to destroy him.

 

[Quiet Sound]

I'd build a better one. Then one better than that. Technological singularity!

 

[innonimatu]

So, aware of these new capabilities, what do you do?

It's fantasy, right?

I'd crush it just for that warm luddite feeling

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

Eat it. Yum.

Doing that will kill you.

That was a mighty complicated way to ask: "What would you do if you were almighty?"

I would disagree. It is not complete omnipotence or complete omniscience.

 

[aronnax]

I would lauch all Nuclear missles to the moon and see what happens.

 

[DNK]

Chill.

10char

 

[CCRunner]

Make some country (not mine!) nuke itself and see what happens.

 

[Harbringer]

Stick it in megatrons chest.

 

[Ayatollah So]

The opportunities to play Robin Hood are just too good to pass up. Consider this thread and this one and we all know who's taking the money in this state. Suddenly Oxfam and Red Cross/Crescent and so on would find themselves embarrassed with riches from anonymous donors.

Meanwhile I'd probably use my little supercomputer to pass myself off as some kind of programming genius for a while. But not a super genius - I don't want the oligarchs suspecting who embezzled their money

 

[emzie]

Manipulate the stockmarket and make a bunch of money

 

[Princeps]

I would steal 100 million in small sums from all the richest people on Earth. No one would suffer, I'd live lavishly for the rest of my life.

Also, I'd take over civfanatics.

 

[Zelig]

I would purge the web of bad websites.

Every domain squatting site, gone. Every site with poor design, gone. Every factually wrong site, gone. Every flash based site, gone.

It would be glorious.

 

[Nike Zeus]

Get rich, build myself a cool bunker / harem, and then start a nuclear war.

 

[CCRunner]

Oh yeah, I'd get rich too.