Lets bash Britain

[W|M]

The British say ''hello'' when they greet you?

 

[WindFish]

The British say ''hello'' when they greet you?

Of course not, we say "alright".

People need to stop spreading lies.

 

[Gucumatz]

Why do you say hello? I say goodbye

 

[Borachio]

Dundee?

Poor old Dundee.

No, Slough is the place. Betjamin wrote a poem during WW2 that begins, Come friendly bombs and rain on Slough,

 

[Skwink]

The British say ''hello'' when they greet you?

On the internet they go into a speech on why their country is superior to all others.

I don't know if they do that in real life too though.

 

[W|M]

x-post

Come, friendly bombs, and fall on Slough!
It isn't fit for humans now,
There isn't grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!

Come, bombs and blow to smithereens
Those air -conditioned, bright canteens,
Tinned fruit, tinned meat, tinned milk, tinned beans,
Tinned minds, tinned breath.

Mess up the mess they call a town-
A house for ninety-seven down
And once a week a half a crown
For twenty years.

And get that man with double chin
Who'll always cheat and always win,
Who washes his repulsive skin
In women's tears:

And smash his desk of polished oak
And smash his hands so used to stroke
And stop his boring dirty joke
And make him yell.

But spare the bald young clerks who add
The profits of the stinking cad;
It's not their fault that they are mad,
They've tasted Hell.

It's not their fault they do not know
The birdsong from the radio,
It's not their fault they often go
To Maidenhead

And talk of sport and makes of cars
In various bogus-Tudor bars
And daren't look up and see the stars
But belch instead.

In labour-saving homes, with care
Their wives frizz out peroxide hair
And dry it in synthetic air
And paint their nails.

Come, friendly bombs and fall on Slough
To get it ready for the plough.
The cabbages are coming now;
The earth exhales.

The word ''Slough'' could be replaced with the name of almost anywhere in the UK, and it would still be accurate.

 

[Borachio]

If you don't mind, I'll feel a bit miffed about that last remark.

 

[Gucumatz]

Melzar Cabbages - Good one West India Man

 

[Arakhor]

At least it's not Swindon.

 

[FriendlyFire]

Why did British change all there measurements to metric except for there stupid currency ?

 

[Leoreth]

Do you want to rename pence to centipounds?

 

[CocoIsKing28]

Oh yeah, because those words for so hard to understand with one fewer letter. That "u" really clarifies things and isn't by any means a waste of space.

The "u" adds class to whatever you're writing; add a "u" anywhere in your sentence and you become more sincere, more correct. U.

 

[Leoreth]

It's actually very funny when an English speaker of any variety focuses on one particular superfluous letter in someone else's spelling, as if the rest of their orthography made complete and total sense.

 

[W|M]

At least it's not Swindon.

Swindon's actually a decent place, it's not exactly like Birmingham.

Why did British change all there measurements to metric except for there stupid currency ?

British currency has been using metric since 1971.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

The British don't say I love you enough, which to be honest is a bit off-putting to me.

But on the other end of the emotional spectrum are the Brazilians. Every time a Brazilian team plays soccer and one of them trips, the audience gets a 3 act play of oh my god look at me ref raw 'emotion' as they fall.

 

[W|M]

That's actually just the football players being dramatic because they all secretly want to act in our soap operas.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Hahaha I heard you all have really good soap operas.

I am sure British onea are rather dull.

I lov-- er, emphatically like you dear. But we can never be together so long as your twin, evil, back-from-the-dead-five-times brother still breathes!

 

[Farm Boy]

Let England leave. Keep Scotland, Wales, and maaaaaaybe Northern Ireland (given to the proper Ireland, of course).

Oh ew. Ewewew. EEEEEEEEwwwwwwwwww!

 

[da dick]

Oh ew. Ewewew. EEEEEEEEwwwwwwwwww!

lol good one. leave all the catholics to thmeselves.

 

[Borachio]

It's actually very funny when an English speaker of any variety focuses on one particular superfluous letter in someone else's spelling, as if the rest of their orthography made complete and total sense.

Actually, English spelling - and not some American variant, I mean - does indeed make complete and total sense.

Provided you understand the history of it. That is.

To the casual viewer it appears arbitrarily inconsistent, I will agree.

But...

It's complicated.

Prior to the C17th people just spelled words as they saw fit, according to their regional pronunciations and quirky preferences. And then people started writing dictionaries and thinking about it. Which is always probably a bit of a mistake.

The Americans will naturally tell you a different tale. But... ha... you know what Americans are like, I'm sure.

British currency has been using metric since 1971.

Now you're just being muddled. The Currency was decimalized in 71. Some measurements were metricized about the same time. But not all. By any means.