Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[landlubber]

I ask the dolphins what to do next.

 

[merciary]

I travel with several of my converts to the nearest town and begin to preach the way of Cato.

 

[kill fire]

I get Horace to try and teleport the Hunters again.

 

[Abaddon]

I chill with the still.

(Until healed and unbruised)

 

[Double A]

REVISÉD ORDERS:

One Hunter shoots his fuel rod at Horace, and the other shoots his fuel rod at KFC.

If I can't do that, they both shoot at Horace.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Calculating trajectory... target:merciary...firing all weapons.

11 (15): Even firing blindly, you sense you've hit him for 18 damage.

Okay, I'll just find another way to get off the island.

2: As you look around, a bird lands a shot right in your eye. IT BURNS for 10 damage, and you lose sight in your left eye, incurring a -2 penalty to rolls requiring visual coordination.

Do a spinny attack and wipe out all the mooks within a 10 foot radius.

4: You trip yourself up and land on your elbow for 13 damage.

Awesome! I fly around and look for building materials so I can build a shrine to the Dice God and keep up my good luck.

16: You sight a construction site.

I ask the dolphins what to do next.

5: You can speak to them, but they can't speak back.

I travel with several of my converts to the nearest town and begin to preach the way of Cato.

2: You've been hit by a barrage from Seon and are disoriented.

I get Horace to try and teleport the Hunters again.

1: "HORACE QUICK TELEP-"C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!
Something distracts him and the Hunters land on you again for 20 damage. You also can't feel your legs.

I chill with the still.

7: Time passes.

One Hunter shoots his fuel rod at Horace, and the other shoots his fuel rod at KFC.

16: The fuel rod distracts Horace, preventing him from completing the teleport, while the other deals kill fire another 10 damage.

TheBladeRoden, Anonymoose, remake20, woodland man and bestrfcplayer take 10 damage for inactivity.

 

[kill fire]

I tell Horace and the mobsters to get to safety. Meanwhile, I try to kill the Hunters with a high power energy beam.

 

[civplayah]

A bird flew into my eye? Wonderful. I ask the medical prodigy chimp to perform surgery to bring my sight back.

 

[landlubber]

I drop the dolphins off a civplayah's school for apes so they can learn to speak English.

 

[Double A]

The Hunters CROSS THE BEAMS on kill fire's position.

I tell Horace and the mobsters to get to safety. Meanwhile, I try to kill the Hunters with a high power energy beam.

SHOOTING THEM ONLY PISSES THEM OFF MORE.

 

[mythmonster2]

I pray to the God of Weapons to make KFC's beam malfunction and fire at KFC.

 

[choxorn]

I use materials at the construction site to build a shrine to the Dice God for good luck on the rolls.

 

[Abaddon]

I activly heal my body

 

[merciary]

I pray to Cato to disrupt Seon's aim.

 

[Seon]

Activating anti-deity/other magical assault shield.

 

[!!!!!]

with my building supplies and backhoe I build a secret underground house

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Meanwhile, I try to kill the Hunters with a high power energy beam.

20 (20): You FIRE YOUR LAZER, sending the Covenant ship on a collision course with the ground.
ROLL TO DODGE!
15: Double A parachutes to safety.

A bird flew into my eye? Wonderful. I ask the medical prodigy chimp to perform surgery to bring my sight back.

8: They'll have to operate without anaesthetic.

I drop the dolphins off a civplayah's school for apes so they can learn to speak English.

3: You take 12 damage from the piercing shrieks as they try to cross the land.

The Hunters CROSS THE BEAMS on kill fire's position.

8: The would, but they got lazored.

I pray to the God of Weapons to make KFC's beam malfunction and fire at KFC.

18: After destroying the ship, it rebounds and strikes him for 14 damage.

I use materials at the construction site to build a shrine to the Dice God for good luck on the rolls.

17: You gain a +1 bonus to all rolls.

I activly heal my body

20: By purging yourself of material attachment, you restore yourself to full health.

I pray to Cato to disrupt Seon's aim.

2: You pray to a passing scorpion, who pinches you for -10 hitpoints.

Activating anti-deity/other magical assault shield.

14: It's almost as if you didn't even need to.

with my building supplies and backhoe I build a secret underground house

18: You piece together a house in the hill.

 

[landlubber]

I sing a soft melody to calm them down.

 

[choxorn]

I call the team of Spartans from the last round to come help me.

 

[kill fire]

/evil grin

I fire an energy beam at Double A.