Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[Red_Spy]

I try to cure my raditon using my mind.

 

[Terrance888]

I pray to Jesus instead.

 

[Abaddon]

My Clone heals me.

 

[mythmonster2]

Look in another room.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Civplayah and I exchange HP totals.

8 (11): You siphon off 27 hitpoints to restore yourself to full health.

Restored, I burst out of the door, knocking Abaddon down in the process.

1 (1): You slam into the door for 19 damage and a mild concussion that impedes all rolls by 2.

I try to cure my raditon using my mind.

19: Against all biophysiochemical logic, you re-educate the free radicals back into oppressed moderates.

I pray to Jesus instead.

12: JESUS SAVES 25 hitpoints.

My Clone heals me.

2: A heavy door stands between you, and after a good three minutes' pounding you are less 17 hitpoints.

Look in another room.

11 (12): Cargo bay!!

landlubber, !!!!!, Darth Caesar and Verarde each suffer 15 damage for inactivity.

 

[Double A]

I use my space cheeseburger to communicate with the ship's inhabitants to charm them into making me world leader.

 

[Red_Spy]

I attack somone with my knife.

 

[Terrance888]

I call a crusade with Jesus's power against Civplayah!

 

[Seon]

I calm my nerves to restore my rolls to normal.

 

[mythmonster2]

Smash Red_Spy's face into the radioactive stuff.

 

[Abaddon]

The link between myself and my clone is restored (I get to control his actions again)

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I use my space cheeseburger to communicate with the ship's inhabitants to charm them into making me world leader.

OK, one exception. Dude, we've been over this. You gotta negotiate. With the players. As people.

I attack somone with my knife.

19 (20): You tear into mythmonster2 for 26 damage, delivering ongoing injuries worth -11 hitpoints per turn.

I call a crusade with Jesus's power against Civplayah!

2: Violence is not the way! You receive a -3 penalty to rolls for aggressive actions.

I calm my nerves to restore my rolls to normal.

14 (11): You are no longer insecure.

Smash Red_Spy's face into the radioactive stuff.

10 (11): You knock him back into the ooze, and he is recontaminated for -5 hp/turn.

The link between myself and my clone is restored (I get to control his actions again)

After careful deliberation, he decides against genetics-based authority FORREST OF TIME.

 

[Double A]

I DON'T KNOW WHO'S ON THE SHIP! OR WHERE I AM! I AM SO CONFUS!

I use mah cheezburgah to ask Seon what he wants to let me be world leader.

 

[Seon]

I tell Double A that he can try and boost my dice rolls.

 

[mythmonster2]

Kick Red_Spy where it hurts. Also, call for my bodyguard if that counts as a free action.

 

[Terrance888]

Violence is the way! I Rip off all my negative modifiers and throw them randomly!

 

[Boundless]

Nvrmnd

 

[Abaddon]

I mature as an alien, my bonus bound forward turning me into this....

+5 to physical attack I would hope?

 

[Red_Spy]

I hide.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I DON'T KNOW WHO'S ON THE SHIP! OR WHERE I AM! I AM SO CONFUS!

I use mah cheezburgah to ask Seon what he wants to let me be world leader.

(Abaddon, Darth Caesar, Seon, mythmonster2, civplayah, Verarde, CivGeneral, Red_Spy, Terrance888.
You are somewhere between the ship and Earth, tending toward Earth.)

15 (18): You can try and boost his dice rolls.

I tell Double A that he can try and boost my dice rolls.

10 (8): In space, no-one can hear you shout yourself hoarse.

Kick Red_Spy where it hurts. Also, call for my bodyguard if that counts as a free action.

6 (7): You miss and pull a muscle for 6 damage. You summon your bodyguard with the panic button; he should be with you shortly.

Violence is the way! I Rip off all my negative modifiers and throw them randomly!

11 (8): But how can you throw an abstract concept?

I mature as an alien, my bonus bound forward turning me into this....

+5 to physical attack I would hope?

11: You grow a little tougher, reducing the corrosion by 3 hp/turn.

I hide.

16: As mythmonster2 tends to his sore thigh, you conceal yourself amongst the shipping crates, reducing the effectiveness of his rolls against you by 3 until you are found.