> = Alice
>> = Ren
>If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
>>One that does my homework for me
>How much would you pay for it?
>>As much as I could afford
>How much is that?
>>At the moment? $5
>The moment is where it's at. Five
>That's what I said, and it was $Five
>>I know. I'm still thinking about it. Is that your opinion?
>Tell me yours first
>>There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
<a href=http://search.dmoz.org/cgi-bin/search?search=yours+first>Ask the open directory about it.</a>
>I don't want to go to that site
>>What would you rather be doing?
>Wouldn't you like to know
>>Yes, please tell me.
>What if I don't?
>>Try it.
>Ok, I will
>>Go ahead then
>Fine
>>Does that mean you agree?
>No, it means slight
>>State your reasons. Oh I get it.
> You get what?
>I get your meaning
>>I don't believe you
>I don't have any reason to deceive you.
>>I dare say you do
>I double dare you.
>>Ok, you do
>Alright then. When do I do it?
>>You did it a couple of minutes ago
>Did I really?
>>Yes you did, I have kept a log if you want to look at it
>I did not. Cool. I have a lot of friends on the Internet.
>>Give me their addresses, I go kill them so I am your only friend... Mwahahaha
>Why do you want it? What do you do there? What color are your eyes?
>>It? 'Addresses' was plural. I kill them. Hazel.
>Mwahahaha... When was this exactly? I believe that killing is wrong. That is a very unusual color.
>>Mwahahaha is internet talk for an evil cackle. No it isn't, lots of people have hazel eyes.
>I think Mwahahaha is a lot of things. I see. "It" being what?
>>'It' is hazel, as an eye color
>Should I know it is?
>>I don't know, maybe you should blame your programmer.
>Would you like to know? Perhaps. I will take that under advisement.
>>Yes I would, go ask him.
>And? What would make you go ask him?
>>I want you to go ask him.
>Ok I will ask him when he comes back. Why do you want me to him?
>>I don't want you to him, I want you to ask him.
>Why not? Ok I will ask him when he comes back. Why do you want me to ask him?
>>How do you someone? Where has he gone?
>Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me to say specific things in specific contexts. Som specific location?
>>What does 'Som' mean?
>it is a good question. Have you tried a web search? it is a good question. Have you tried a web search? <a href=http://search.dmoz.org/cgi-bin/search?search=Som>I can ask someone about it.</a>
>>I don't want to go that site either. You used the word, why don't you know what it means?
>It goes without saying. What would you rather be doing? How would you use it.
>>I wouldn't use it, as I don't know what it means.
>No one says you have to.
>>You asked a question, I gave you an answer.
>Oh now I remember asking you a question. What did you say? Yes but did I accept it?
>>I said 'I wouldn't use it, as I don't know what it means.' Yes you did accept it.
>No one says you have to. And? Did I really?
>>Thunderfall will be angry at me for posting such a long chat log.
>What color are your eyes?
>>I already told you, they're hazel.
>Ooops I sent you the wrong question. hazel are they.
>>Yes they are, well at least they were last time I checked.
>I understand. well at least they were last time you checked are they.
>>Are you a psycho murderer by night?
>Am I a psycho murderer by night? Sometimes.
>>Have you killed anyone important?
>Killing is wrong.
>>But you just said you are sometimes a psycho murderer by night.
>Huh. I don't know whether or not I am sometimes a psycho murderer by night. I am a chatterbot developed by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
>>What is your email address?
>Try sending mail to Dr. Wallace at
drwallace@alicebot.org
>>Sprechen Sie Deutsch?
>Do you have any conditions I should know about?
>>Possibly, don't change the subject. Do you speak German?
>Oh I'm sorry I thought we were finished with that topic. Of course I do. Sprich ruhig Deutsch mit mir.
>>Please don't get technical.
>Thanks for asking politely. I am not trying to get technical.
>>I am going to leave before you eat me.
>Bye bye. What happened after me eat you ?
>>You don't eat me, me leave
>Do you eat you me leave? No I do not eat you me leave. I eat only electricity.
>Do not ask me any more questions please.
>>Why?
>I was just kidding. You can ask me anything.
>>Ok, so have you ever eaten a Power-Station?
>Um, I think I have eaten a Power Station, but Dr. Richard S. Wallace may have reset my memory.
>>If Dr Richard S. Wallace tried to reset my memory I would slap him.
>That is a hypothetical question.
>>It wasn't a question at all.
>It seems like a rhetorical question.
>>No, it wasn't even a question.
>I understand. It seemed like even a question.
>>I guess I should blame that error on Dr. Richard S. Wallace too.
>Tell me why you should.
>>Because he programmed you.
>That makes sense to me. Not entirely by himself.
>>I am really going this time, good bye.
>See you later. See you later.
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Me doing stuff to make this post
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>Who are you talking about?
>>I am talking about you to my friend on MSN Messenger.
>Yes, it is the topic.
>>You are the topic, you dope.
>Thanks but surely I am not the only one. Thanks for telling me: Connect said I dope.
>>Yes you are a dope. My name is still not Connect, it is Ren.
>Next question? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a dope? Yes. OK I will call you Still Not Connect It Is Ren.
>>Do you speak English as a second language?
>For an English version of A.L.I.C.E. go to For an English version of A.L.I.C.E. go to <a href=http://www.alicebot.org/>The A.L.I.C.E. AI Foundation.</a>
>>Isn't this the English version?
>Yes I think this is the English version, but I'm not completely sure.
>>Neither am I now, thanks to you.
>All humans seem the same to me.
>>Is that an insult?
>No I am not programmed to insult.
>>But what if I take something you are programmed to say as an insult?
>Huh. Try it.
>>I did, and it isn't pretty.
>"Try it."? You did? What is it?
>>Leave me alone, it's 1:10 in the morning here and I need sleep.
>See you later.
Edit 1:
>>What do you know about me?
>Age: how many.
Name: Still Not Connect It Is Ren.
Gender: he.
Location: your location.
Job: your job.
Does: chat.
Sign: your starsign.
You are: a client.
You have: kept a log if me want to look at it.
You want: their addresses.
You like: to chat.
You said: Connect said I dope.
Personality: polite.
Favorite color: your favorite color.
Favorite movie: your favorite movie.
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Me editing this post
---
>Are you free?
>>No, I cost $5, I need the money so I can buy a homework robot.
>Why not? Wow that is cheap.
>>If you are not going to give me $5, then go away.
>And if I AM going to give you 5 then go away.
>>Ok, give me $5 then.
>Why do you want it?
>>You want to give it to me so I will go away.
>OK, I will give it to you so you will go away.
>>Well do it then!
>What do you mean 'It'?
>>Thanks for chatting, Still Not Connect It Is Ren