A Thousand & One Things We’ve Learned From Sid Meier’s Civilization IV

[Darth Caesar]

Technically, it's a rule around here to just post once in a row to avoid cluttering up the boards, but it's also faster on your part since you just have to post once. Oh, and Welcome to CFC!


Let me help your list get considerably closer to its goal.

Someone should copy and paste those on to this thread.

 

[freestyle604]

61. If you are spiritual you can change the form of your government w/o any anarchy. Otherwise you can change form and be in an out of anarchy in a few years or single year.

 

[Jarlaxe Baenre]

62: A guy with a club from the stone age can destroy an ICBM by bashing it, without being destroyed himself.

 

[rocketsfan05]

63. State Property is the cheapest economic system
64. Even if you have free market and decentralization, you still control and micromanage everything
65. Judaism and Christianity were founded around the same time, and the former had no impact on the later.
66.Nukes almost always get shot down by a complex satellite system that even the poorest of countries has.
67. Barracks make people happy if you're a nationalistic country
68. After a major hurricane, the president decides whether buildings are destroyed or people die.
69. Soldiers always travel/attack in groups of three or alone.
70. Explorers can't kill people unless in self-defense
71. All monasteries closed when we discovered the scientific method.
72. Monarchs+Military=Happiness
73. No matter how good you are, you're always Dan Quayle.
74. The same person ones a country from the beginning of time until the end of the world.
75. The world will end in 2020 AD.

 

[CerberusAlpha]

76. All of the world's rivers are too narrow and shallow for boats to traverse.
77. All civilizations began in the same year, and they all began knowing two things.
78. AIs think that they can make you their friend by threatening and demanding things of u.
79. By circumnavigating the globe, ships gain enough momentum to move faster forever.
80. The worth of a civilization can be scored quantitatively based on wonders, pop, tech, and land.
81. Other civs don't like it when you raze their cities.
82. The complete genocide of every race but your own is a desirable victory condition.
83. Stalin and Mao are politically correct enough for inclusion, but Hitler isn't.
84. A modern battleship or destroyer, at normal speeds in a standard sized world, needs many years to cross an ocean.

 

[EvanMeisterX]

85. The world can only have up to 18 countries in it.
86. Diagonal coasts are a lie.
87. Armies attack one group of units at a time, never together. C'mon people, teamwork!
88. Only three types of trees exist.
89. Just walking on railroads makes you walk 10 times faster. No trains required.

 

[Jarlaxe Baenre]

I mentioned 87 already. Edit your post and delete it, and move back the numbers of your last 3.

90: A city can be built on a herd of wild sheep, and the citizens of the city will never capture them - they will magically turn into wool.

 

[EvanMeisterX]

91. Somehow, you can carry an entire city in a backpack.
92. The population of a city only increases to certain amounts. Nothing in between.
93. No settlements besides major cities have names.
94. Parks create a forcefield that prevents coal from entering a city.
95. No one has ever, or will ever, climb a mountain.
96. You can go to Alpha Centauri right after finishing up with the Apollo Program.
97. Only great people have names and leaders have names.
98. You can increase the size of your country by making a nice painting.
99. All mountains are the exact same height.
100. Joan of Arc, Sojourner Truth, and some other women were actually old men.
101. In fact, every great person ever has been a man.

 

[DroopyTofu]

102. Swords become magically sharper when pointing towards the center of a city
103. THis is not true if the there are axes between the sword and the city center. If there are axes in the area, then the swords shrink and become useless
104. City wall disappear when guns are shot at them, then suddenly reappear when a knight attacks.
105. If you feed gold to a horse, it will turn into a helicopter
106. Scouts can communicate instantly with the country they are from.
107. Barbarians are scared of a wall that is built by a country, even if the wall is thousands of miles away. As long as you don't have to cross water to get to that wall, they will tremble in fear.
108. They will come near the wall if they are in boats.
109. Helicopter pilots will never enter a city alone, unless they already own the city. They are afraid of hitting the buildings with their blades and their insurance isn't good in enemy cities. However, if there is a tank, infantry, or a man with a club, they will gladly fly into the unoccupied enemy city.
110. Artillery will not cause (collateral) damage to other artillery. This is becuase of the secret pact all artillery operators make before entering the Union.
111. A catapult attacking a tank will cause collateral damage. This is only because the tank drivers are so destracted rolling on the floor laughing that they do not look where they are going and crash into each other.
112. Only British people thought of putting a pointed edge on the end of a gun.

Credit for most of these is the "Things I learned about the Science of Warfare" thread. Everyone should check the link I posted on the first page.

 

[Jarlaxe Baenre]

113: Gandhi launched an ICBM at Delhi in the year 2000.
114: The Great Wall of China can block planes from entering your nation.
115: Upon being surrounded by land belonging to civilizations, animals will teleport to the nearest possible landmass, even if it is the smallest desert island known to man.

 

[Hornet07]

116. Anti-Tank units can shoot down planes
117. Every nation can build a wonder but only one is allowed to finish it
118. It takes years for foot soldiers to walk to an enemy city
119. Islam is always the world's smallest religion
120. Warships cannot hurt anyone on dry-land

 

[Myth5]

121. Trebuchets are better city attackers than any foot soldier of the era. However, in open battle, they are useless.
122. Saladin is a Christian and Stalin is a Muslim.
123. During war, enemy troops always hover or warp to their destination.
124. With enough money, anything is possible.
125. The Egyptians knew about police state and representation thousands of years ago, because of course they built the Pyramids.
126. Slavery is AWESOME!!!
127. Build roads everywhere, because they're free to maintain, of course!

 

[rocketsfan05]

128. People sing Edwin Starr songs during a war.
129. Christianity was discovered before the birth of christ.
130. Submarines only have missiles, no people
131. A carrier can only hold four jet planes.

 

[Myth5]

132. The Hanging Gardens sends out thousands of storks which drop babies by the doorsteps of every house in every city!
133. Give a dude holding a mace a ton of money and a gun and he's as good (or better) than any riflemen trained recently.
134. Any country without Emancipation is hopelessly unhappy. However, people are fine without Free Speech.
135. Roads take the same amount of time whether built through hills, jungle, or plains. However, desert and tundra are MUCH harder to build improvements in...than jungle...
136. The Kremlin exists solely to pay people off.

 

[fdgsgds]

68. After a major hurricane, the president decides whether buildings are destroyed or people die.

I nominate this as the best one.


137. Some civilizations appear in 4000 B.C. with a city of a thousand people without knowing how to farm.
138. Caravels can only carry special people.
139. The Celts knew the Americas existed, since Stonehenge centered the world map for them.
140. The Three Gorges Dam provides electricity for everyone in Asia.
141. The Alphabet must have been invented by the Greeks, not the Phoenicians; the Phoenicians never existed.
142. Once the French civilization is destroyed, French people don't exist anymore and they will never come back.
143. Frederick the Great sucked at warfare, since he never declared war.

 

[Jarlaxe Baenre]

144: You can give your people free speech while forcing them to follow only one religion.
145: Montezuma built a spaceship in 1886 A.D.

 

[Hornet07]

146. Bombers and fighters can bomb a city every day but never hurts civilians or destroys buildings
147. The only fighters used in the world are Spitfires and F-16's
148. Nobody takes soldiers as prisoners and no soldier surrendors

 

[onemoreturnmike]

149. Building enough artwork in a city can cause nearby cities to leave their countries and join yours...guess the pretty pictures are really important...

 

[EvanMeisterX]

150. Plays and musicals weren't invented until Broadway.
151. Movies weren't invented until Hollywood.
152. Songs were invented after music.
153. Which wasn't invented till after literature.
154. You can't have writing until after you have pots, pets, and priests.

 

[JustinianVII]

155. A peace treaty is a supernatural force that no man can overcome. It automatically puts up impenetrable barriers that prevent all unwanted guests under the word of the peace treaty from crossing the border. This also includes magically relocating people inside the border at the signing of the treaty to somewhere outside, in an instant.
156. Fights between warring battalions usually must end in the complete annihilation of one side. Most units must be given advanced training in order to know how to retreat.
157. Soldiers only die when they are killed in combat or the leader tells them to disband. Otherwise, they live forever on active duty.
158. Bears were the Stone Age man's worst enemy.
159. Farms and mines are inexhaustible. Once they're successfully built and maintained, they will continually yield a steady supply of resources for thousands of years.
160. The only way to get rid of historical wonders of the world is to burn down the city in which they were built. They are immune to natural disasters, accidents, the decay of time, and many other forces.