Comedy Improv One-Liner Contest Thread, Parto Uno:

[Narz]

I like my women like I like my magazines: opening themselves to me with the slightest pressure from my fingertips!

 

[echinococcus]

I like my women like I like my magazines -
Physically in front of me instead of just online.

 

[dwaxe]

I like my women like I like my magazines... blowing my gun.

It's your turn.

 

[Narz]

I didn't get that one. (how do magazines "blow a gun"?)

 

[Catharsis]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magazine_(firearms)

 

[Zack]

I like my women like I like my trash bags:

 

[Dumanios]

I like my women like I like my trash bags: filled with my $hit.

 

[Narz]

I like my women like I like my trash bags: Waiting on the curb to be taken by the garbageman when I'm not around.

 

[Catharsis]

I like my women like I like my trash bags: trashy.

(Go for the obvious one, yeahhhhhh)

 

[Joecoolyo]

I like my women like I like my trash bags: Hefty Hefty Hefty!

 

[Zack]

I like my women like I like my trash bags: Hefty Hefty Hefty!

Sorry I'm a little late, but this one was by far the best. (Condoms are wimpy wimpy wimpy! Oh wait... were you making a reference to the commercial or the Family Guy episode?)

 

[Joecoolyo]

Sorry I'm a little late, but this one was by far the best. (Condoms are wimpy wimpy wimpy! Oh wait... were you making a reference to the commercial or the Family Guy episode?)

Yay! My first win . Oh, and I guess I was making a reference to both of them.

Next up:

I like my women like I like my iPhones:

 

[choxorn]

I like my women like I like my iPhones: Many applications, none of which involve talking.

 

[Veritass]

I like my women like I like my iPhones: one swipe of the finger, and they are turned on and ready.

 

[Omni314]

I like my women like I like my iPhones: responding to my every touch

 

[Zack]

I like my women like I like my iPhones: Fitting into my pants comfortably.

 

[Joecoolyo]

I like my women like I like my iPhones: one swipe of the finger, and they are turned on and ready.

Veritass, your up

 

[Veritass]

Posting on CFC is like shopping at WalMart:

 

[Zack]

Posting on CFC is like shopping at WalMart: you run into your fair share of geniuses as well as your fair share of idiots.

 

[Fr8monkey]

Posting on CFC is like shopping at WalMart: Wanting a sence of community and sane discussion and running into 50 people all named "Bubba".