Corrupt a Wish

[Tecknojock]

Granted, it drives you insane.
I wish Firestone would be willing to fix my car instead of making me get it towed to another shop.

 

[DarthNader]

Granted, but Firestone goes bankrupt halfway through the repair work.

I wish I had a mountain named after me.

 

[Save_Ferris]

Granted, but it turns out it's a volcano and it kills half of Honolulu.

I wish Good Eats would come back.

 

[JamesCaesar]

Granted, but you cannot view it.

I wish for no school.

 

[mayor]

Granted but now you can't find a job, no woman wants to stay with you and you end up in the gutter with no money for food or shelter.

I wish my thesis was done

 

[DarthNader]

Granted, but you will never be able to defend it.

I wish my professor didn't have such a strong Brazilian accent.

 

[Tecknojock]

Granted, but he now has an even stronger Chinese accent.

i wish my professors were more engaging instead of just droning on.

 

[Buddhafish]

Granted, but classes now take three times longer than they normally are. More interesting, but longer.

I wish the Patriots could have won the Super Bowl.

 

[DarthNader]

Granted, but Tom Brady suffers a career ending injury and Bill Belichick leaves to coach the Ravens.

I wish the Super Bowl had a better halftime show.

 

[SouthernKing]

Granted. Nipplegate happens again.

I wish it was June.

 

[Buddhafish]

Granted, but you switch hemispheres so the weather doesn't change.

I wish that I could fly

 

[Optical]

Granted, see story of Icarus.

I wish I could land on the sun without coming to any harm.

 

[DarthNader]

Granted, but you realize it is inhabited by trillions of beings that sound like Fran Drescher. Also, you can't leave.

I wish I had never been born.

 

[SouthernKing]

Granted, but then NES would not be the same.

I wish for oewifyoi12y0t4914-hg1

 

[mayor]

Granted but it turns you into a jkbhdgiuw3yt09p-k

I wish I could drink alcohol without getting drunk


EDIT: 1,500 posts

 

[hoplitejoe]

Granted, Hangovers become your life.

I wish the snow was still snow not ice.

 

[GhostWriter16]

Granted, it continued to snow... for the next 40 days and flooded the northern world. Dixieland returned.

I wish Dixieland would return but without slavery.

 

[DarthNader]

Granted, but Zombie Sherman rises from the dead and carries out Sherman's March 2.0

I wish I could turn anything I will into vodka.

 

[mayor]

Granted, but you are not able to drink the vodka

I wish I could think of a wish

 

[JohannaK]

Granted, but you can't make it.

I wish the person after me doesn't wish anything.