I have been socialized to red flag the word "historically", since it is now usually prefaces some conflict theory/et al nonsenseThat's the postmodern mind for you. Its only use for history is what it can use for politics. It has no idea what it has lost and when it arrives as wisdom, it thinks it has brought forth a new thing into the world, instead of refinding wisdom that human beings acquired through pain and error over the course of millennia. T
Then I wouldn't chalk it up to any more than youngsters being rebellious against the hustle and bustle of urban life. And just give them room. The US has had hobos, and the Lost Generation, hippies, and so on; so if they're not hurting anyone who cares...Japanese cities are quite walkable, or so I have heard
Urban landscapes do not have to be hostile towards pedestrians. I've lived in several places and have noticed the differences, even just within the same city.
As for why hikikomori is a Japanese phenomenon, seems to be more of a cultural thing but IMHO Japan is just at the cutting edge of a phenomenon that affects wealthy, industrialised societies in general.
I think most people are risk averse. There are a lot of complicated things going on with her (many of which I'm sure I don't know about as her mom keeps me in complete blackout) but regarding the school I think it's simple math, she dosn't like school (most kids don't) therefore if she option not to go she'll take it.My question to you regarding the first paragraph would be if you feel she is "risk averse"?
This is my view not hers. She views her obsessions as merely 'interests'. How she actually views them I don't know, I think she's aware they are emotional armor, an escape & something safe to obsess about. It could be worse, she could be into boys or opiates or pop stars or cosmetic surgery.I am more interested in her view of "sea of distractions" (as this may be a projection) PM me if you don't want to talk publicly.
Where there's a will there's a way, can carpool, figure out train & bus routes. It's not easy but it's possible. I lost my drivers license in a very unfair way & in protest I didn't pay my fines & lost my license (as Sonny Curtis noted, the law usually wins in the end & I had to pay more in the end to get my license back) and I managed to get around via bike, trains, buses, etc for a few years. It's not easy and in most places not convenient or pleasant but it is possible.Me, I'd like to be able to get away from cities entirely every once in a while, but I'm pretty fortunate as an American to be able do that. Unfortunately you DO need a car here.
This is, I think, the single biggest problem inherent with modernity and the trajectory of civilization, for an individual's health and welfare.I'm with @Gorbles on this is part alienation and part cyclical.
But there is a difference in scale. First in terms of intensity of the phenomenon. Before, people were indeed criticized for losing themselves in books (read Don Quixote...), in TV or other stuff. But they needed to go out. Real shut-ins were few, only the depressed and the sick/moribund. And many of those had extended close families. Those who didn't snap out of it didn't last long if really isolated.
And then in terms of extent of the phenomenon. The world had never been so urbanized. And peopel so economically alienated, as in handling eberything in their lives in terms of economic transactios, bying all their needs. They used to have to do stuff because there was no one providing it as a service.
I'm worried.
Like planned obsolescence, it's planned impotence. I saw this Lex Friedman interview with Jeff Bezos, I'd never seen Bezos talk before so I thought I'd listen. Bezos was going on & on about the customer experience & making it as easy ("frictionless") as if he mission was all about the consumer. Humans love of the easy route is being taken advantage of. Again, not on a high-horse, I use Amazon as it's cheaper, easier & quicker than going to ten different other websites or shops.This is, I think, the single biggest problem inherent with modernity and the trajectory of civilization, for an individual's health and welfare.
I just got back from 3 months in Central America. Everything people do there takes work, effort, coordination, problem solving, etc. I was explaining to my partner how different it is to have that necesity to keep you constantly moving, thinking, problem solving. So it's tiring and uncomfortable, but it's exercise and stimulating and healthy.
The challenge here in the USA/etc is when the impetus to literally move is gone, depression inherently takes its place. To counteract this requires motivation through your prefrontal cortex in the form of goals and will to power.
It's no wonder there's an adderall shortage.
We text but it's mostly dried up on her end. I definitely don't tell her she "has to" do anything as it's ineffective (and also I always hated when anyone told me that). When I see her we spend like 95% of the time talking about whatever she wants to & I try to sprinkle in advice & personal questions here & there.@Narz, terrible situation for your x to shut you out of your daughter's life. You seem to be in a powerless position. Have you had any communication with her (x)...does she see an issue? Would she be honest? I'll tell you one thing, if all the conversations with your daughter end up as "you have to....". she will likely avoid you..
Yup. And my guess is you will continue to see greater pushes towards working from home in the US which is advertised as a convenience but which, as you say, only worsens isolation. Its proponents will, of course, say that it reduces operating costs (ex. power) for companies and others, yet also necessitating more "on call" employment now that workers will always have their "work" computer at home. Electronic company towns.This is, I think, the single biggest problem inherent with modernity and the trajectory of civilization, for an individual's health and welfare.
I just got back from 3 months in Central America. Everything people do there takes work, effort, coordination, problem solving, etc. I was explaining to my partner how different it is to have that necesity to keep you constantly moving, thinking, problem solving. So it's tiring and uncomfortable, but it's exercise and stimulating and healthy.
The challenge here in the USA/etc is when the impetus to literally move is gone, depression inherently takes its place. To counteract this requires motivation through your prefrontal cortex in the form of goals and will to power.
It's no wonder there's an adderall shortage.
I watched the lecture. I read the post.
This video is 12 years old, pre-smartphones, pre-covid.
I remember reading maybe 15 years ago about a trend in Japan called
hikikomori kids . Basically shut-ins withdrawn from society, now it seems almost the new normal.
My elder daughter is basically hikikomori. During coronatimes she did
virtual school for awhile & decided she liked it better. I can't say
I don't understand her reasoning, school is boring and the social
pressure is stressful. So she decided she'd prefer to attend virtual
school & her mom let her (her mother supposed to ask for my consent
regarding schooling, medical stuff, etc but that's just not her
style). Now she might go months without socialization, just
parasocial relationships. Her mom recently moved house (without
informing me). If I'd moved house at 15 it would've been a huge
change in my life, but for her it will probably barely be a blip, as
long as the computer comes along.
There's an ever expanding array of 'mental disorders' to try on
(please consult a mental health professional and/or tiktok) but it seems
few are organic (from some sort of genetic brain defect) and most
are simply attempts to handle profound systemic alienation.
With smartphones the idea of 'local' becomes ever more abstract. I'm
not on a high horse, when I goto the gym I have my own music on, most
of my day I'm listening to podcasts & lectures via headphones on what I'm interested
in not querying the townsfolk @ Tesco's for their opinions. I try to
be minimal in my consumption but I utilize Amazon & Costco when I can
to save money.
I haven't been on forums or social media for five months (save for
posting once on FB & have used FB marketplace) as an attempt to be
more present in my life but it's futile really, my social life is
basically nil outside my nuclear family & a four year old & one year
old clamoring for me to dress & undress their dolls in no match for
the wide array of intellectual 'nourishment' (like most modern
processes it nourishes in some ways while hunger remains) I can find
online. I do try to stay present with them as much as possible
obviously, likewise with their mum and I'm doing better but it would
be easier with a village (so we wouldn't have to lean so heavily on
just each other) & I don't have one.
If you got money you can buy community I guess or if you've stayed in
one place & been smart amount the way you've lived your life you
probably won't see things like I do but to me it feels very intense &
I see it in everything. Lately I've been trying to see it as a
natural cycle, we are in an extremely individualistic period in
history right now (we is parasitically exploited by the ruling class who
are also victim to it, when I look at the behavior of Elon Musk for
instance he appears to be a very lonely man despite immediate access
to sycophantic adoration @ a moment's notice).
I also try to keep in mind that I shouldn't idealize communal life.
In my adolescence I spent time @ a boarding school where I literally
didn't have a moment alone for two years, stuck with a lot of
malfunctioning miscreants day in & day out. I've stayed in
relationships & with friends for a sense of companionship & shared
mission that were mostly a fantasy in my head. So yeah, social isolation is better than a toxic social life.
In the political sphere (in US), people like Alex Jones rage against globalism while hawking overpriced
globalized products, Trump went on about America first & bringing back
manufacturing jobs while Biden told his donors nothing would fundamental
change if he was elected. Obviously there's populism on the left like
Sanders but it's more suppressed albeit more genuine.
Anyway, I'm all over the place as per usual, just wondering what the
'local' views 'here' are on globalization, the future of 'place' and
community autonomy in the modern world (feel free to comment on the
video as well if you like).
I thought I'd seen all the takes on anti-remote work. I didn't think I'd see one masquerading as anti-corp at a time that all corporations are trying to flat out kill remote working, but here we are.Yup. And my guess is you will continue to see greater pushes towards working from home in the US which is advertised as a convenience but which, as you say, only worsens isolation. Its proponents will, of course, say that it reduces operating costs (ex. power) for companies and others, yet also necessitating more "on call" employment now that workers will always have their "work" computer at home. Electronic company towns.
I’m about her age (I assume she’s also a freshman) and I think she should have her own15
I think her decision making skills are poor as she doesn't often have to make them and she protects herself from making them due to lack of confidence which is a vicious cycle
Again I understand being young and wanting to avoid social anxiety and avoid the pressure of having to worry about what adult life will entail and now kids are navigating the sea of distractions that is our modern world that didn't exist 30 years ago.
For fracks sake, your ex left you. I’m sorry to say this, but get over her.I think most people are risk averse. There are a lot of complicated things going on with her (many of which I'm sure I don't know about as her mom keeps me in complete blackout) but regarding the school I think it's simple math, she dosn't like school (most kids don't) therefore if she option not to go she'll take it.
Again, in her shoes I would've done the same, frankly I did do the same, I dropped out of school @ 14, difference is there was no virtual school back then.
She has her own right to what she wants to talk about too.This is my view not hers. She views her obsessions as merely 'interests'. How she actually views them I don't know, I think she's aware they are emotional armor, an escape & something safe to obsess about. It could be worse, she could be into boys or opiates or pop stars or cosmetic surgery.
I really have very little idea about her inner world as anytime I ask she deflects talking about five nights @ fredys or something similar. Unfortunately I find most of her interests painfully boring & get worse over time.
Yes, and those technologies are called methylphenidate and dextroamphetamineI think humans will continue to adapt and integrate technology.
Working from home is indeed wonderful and also carries this risk.Yup. And my guess is you will continue to see greater pushes towards working from home in the US which is advertised as a convenience but which, as you say, only worsens isolation. Its proponents will, of course, say that it reduces operating costs (ex. power) for companies and others, yet also necessitating more "on call" employment now that workers will always have their "work" computer at home. Electronic company towns.
Own what?I’m about her age (I assume she’s also a freshman) and I think she should have her own
I don't care about my ex I care about my conduct regarding our mutual child. This is not some teenage relationship where you fight and move on. If you have friends w divorced parents you can ask them about such things.For fracks sake, your ex left you. I’m sorry to say this, but get over her.
People can talk about whatever they want but if you want people to like you you have to show interest in them and their world.She has her own right to what she wants to talk about too.
What is the left? What is inclusive?Finally, and I say this with all sincerity. The only solution to this is more left-wing type behavior. The right wing is exclusive on every level, from bedroom behavior to status behavior, the left is inclusive.
Empathy is great but impotent empathy (at best, often 'the left's' empathy comes across performative) is merely painful and it's understandable why people turn away from it.[/quote]It seems clear to anyone who reads and has even a modicum of empathy.
You lost me here.You are never going to get people to stop shooting up schools when you keep telling them that society is evil or they are evil...
Real shut-ins were few, only the depressed and the sick/moribund. And many of those had extended close families. Those who didn't snap out of it didn't last long if really isolated.
They are still experimenting with them and now they can gather data from afar and manipulate them in real time and see the results.They used to dispose of those people in asylums to kill em off faster. Experiment with them as well
speak for yourselfWorking from home is indeed wonderful and also carries this risk.