Horror stories from your home

[hobbsyoyo]

Hey yall,
This is a thread for people to share stories about crappy conditions in their apartment or home. Hopefully, it'll be a good place to gripe about this and maybe share tips on dealing with problems.

My gripe:
My apartment building is old, it's from the early 60's. While this isn't necessarily a problem, the owner is a little old lady who will not upgrade anything that isn't completely broken.

For instance, my stove and over are 1960's teal green contraptions and other apartments have matching 1960's refrigerators. Luckily, at some point before I moved in, the old fridge broke so I have slightly more modern one than most of the other apartments.

The carpeting looks to be original as well, it's covered in cigarrette burns and the threads get pulled out in places when I vaccuum. The countertops are this ugly 60's starburst patter that stain permanently when anything spills on them.

The sink and toilet are so old that the porcelain must be roughed up and provide ample surface area for microorganisms - we clean them religiously but the mold grows back overnight in most cases and can never be completely scrubbed off. The ceiling in the bathroom collects rust and mold after we shower (even though we leave the door open/fan on for ventilation) and it has holes in it from where water has rotted through in a couple of places. They tried painting over the holes but it's obvious where they are.

The air conditioner has broken down 5 or 6 times in a year and the repairman has stated it's next to impossible to find parts for the ancient device.

We had a roach infestation building wide last summer and in the past few nights some sort of animal has moved in between the space between floors. Every morning around 3 or 4 it starts hacking away at the wood or something. It sounds like a jackhammer or a woodpecker that's in the walls. I don't hear it scurry around, but I get woken up every fracking day by the pounding (no, it's not sex before anyone asks). Does anyone have any clue what kind of animal does that? I think it's a rat but I've never had one before so I don't know.

We are neat people and keep the place clean. Our neighbors, on the otherhand, don't think twice to dumb garbage outside (can't be bothered to put it in the bins) and will dump their old furniture outside even though the city won't pick it up. We had one group of renters leave a couch on the lawn, I guess for lulz. It sucks because I have to call it in (furniture will sit there for months because no one else cares to call about it) and in the meantime the roaches and rodents move in.

This place sucks but we're pretty much stuck here for a few years until I get out of college.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that while many of these problems are due to the owners negligence/cheap-assness, the building managers (there is a company in town that manages property for owners/collect the rent - they have a near monopoly on the rental market in Rolla) have been hit with a class action lawsuit over deposit fees. They basically take your deposit and tell you upfront that you won't see it again as they use it to paint and clean the apartment. This is illegal in Missouri (you can't take a deposit to correct normal wear and tear) but they get away with it as a large portion of their renters are dumb college kids who don't know better.

Anywhoo, do you guys have any similar issues? Does anyone know what kind of animal makes a thud-thud-thud noise in the middle of the night?

 

[Crezth]

From the sounds of it you have a roachghost, a deadly creature that can only be completely offed by reciting the entire works of Shakespeare from memory. If left unchecked, roachghosts can and will eat a building into another dimension. Definitely a Class Primus Pestlike.

While you brush up on your Complete Unabridged Wm. Shakespeare, I recommend the use of anti-ghast spraycreme or perhaps liberal application of voodoo or wiccan rituals. Either one you do, remember that a sufficient voodoo ritual will require 2 or 3 human sacrifices and the burning of a roachghost effigy, and a wiccan ritual with the same Magigrist score will require 40-60 ounces of mouse blood and the indenturing of at least one soul.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

I appreciate the humor but I need serious advice.

 

[Crezth]

Fine, don't take my advice. Lousy muggles.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Where's a chocobo when you need one?

 

[Cutlass]

I had a good, if somewhat cheep, landlord. But he died a year ago, and so while the place is in probate there's not much that can be done about any problem. In the meantime my stove broke down and I can't use the oven anymore.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Oh geese that sucks dude. Our oven burned out a coil (how the heck does that happen?) and it took them a month to fix it.

I had to corner the owner of the management company at a community business meeting I helped run and publicly shame him into fixing it. With humor of course.

 

[rugbyLEAGUEfan]

My flat mate is still pissing himself laughing after I read him the opening sentence of the OP

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

I once lived in this little cottage near the mouth of the Potomac River. It was an old house (built in 1951) that the retired couple who owned it was leasing out to local contractors and the like to watch for them while they were living in Italy during their Golden Years. It was old, creaky, and drafty. It sat on a concrete slab. While I never had a cockroach problem, there were lots of little black beetles that I would find all over the floor in the morning, having died from the still-lingering poison the landlord had bombed the house with. They came up through the floor, because the contract job hired to lay down the new floor - some of that jigsaw-style faux wood stuff - had done a truly awful job of things. They also had painted over lots of the windows, which took several days worth of exhaust-myself muscling to finally force open.

There were two fireplaces, only one of which was useable, and only one of which had a cage on top to keep rodents out (the same one, actually). The one that didn't have a cage also had a broken flue, a combination of circumstances which led to chasing squirrels out of my house on more than one occasion. The one that did have a flue had a wasp nest in the top. Fixing both of these required me to climb on the roof. The wasp nest was actually pretty easy, since it was positioned in a way that allowed me to Raid it from a safe distance; but the chimney cage was an interesting experience. The first time the squirrel "broke and entered" my house was during a derecho in the late fall. Storms at this house were especially bad, since I was on the windward shore of the river, and the rattling old house shook and groaned in the intense winds. I could never sleep through a storm there. Anyway, I had to climb up and throw a makeshift cage on there, crafted in about 30 seconds from a torn piece of window screen taken from my already torn porch windows, which I could only "fasten" to the top of the chimney by weaving twine in and out of the screen holes and pulling it as taut as possible. Imagine me climbing my roof, arms and legs wrapped around my chimney, trying to sew twine through window screen in the middle of a thunderstorm!

The worst part, however, wasn't the fixer-upper things like that. Annoying as they were, I actually came to enjoy them. It was my first place I had paid for entirely by myself since leaving the nest, and I was really a force unto myself in the world now. It was mine (I had met the landlords not long after I moved in, while they were stateside for a wedding - I left such an impression on them that they basically gave me their total trust to do what I wanted, knowing that would entail nothing stupid). But the one unbearable problem with this place was the water supply. Being old and on this sandy peninsula, the house had a shallow steel well, which was neither deep enough nor advanced enough to be entirely free from iron. I should have seen this when I did a walk through before signing the lease: I tasted the water, but I grew up with very hard water so I did not immediately notice the metal taste. The water itself had no distinct color, but everything it touched it dyed a rust color. I was continually cleaning all my basins with Iron-Out, often more than once a week for heavily-used things like the bath tub. But again, that went in my category of annoying, but tolerable. I really got angry when I washed my clothes for the first time, and found them to be irreversably dyed a mixture of dark rust color and general sediment (there was no filter on water to the washing machine - why not!!!! - and both sediment from the pipes as well as the dissolved iron got in). I Jerry-rigged a filtration system for sediment, but the iron was dissolved in the water and not merely filaments, so nothing short of a Water Softener could rid me of it. The laundry had all my work clothes, so I lost several hundred dollars in that load - quite the blow to a starving cook.

I told the landlord about it, and his reply was simply "oh yeah, sorry about that." He told me to use iron out with the laundry. I thought I had found a solution. But alas, the chemical reacted with dyes in my clothes, and turned a bunch of black and blue colored clothes into various shades of purple! Kind of hilarious, but equally destructive to my wardrobe and my wallet. So, after finally realizing the futility of washing clothes there, which I had wanted so badly to do, since I was finally living in a place where I didn't have to pay for laundry machine use, I was forced to pack up my hamper every time I wanted to do laundry, and drive across the county to my parents' house and wash it there. They were happy, of course, to have me around more often again, and it was nice to go "home" so often, but that water situation was a deal-breaker for me. It was the log that broke the camels back, that made sure I wouldn't stay when my lease was up. Too bad, because it was in a supreme location.

 

[NovaKart]

My worst apartment was probably in Azerbaijan. It had an excellent location right in the city center so I couldn't really complain about that. That also had disadvantages though. Sometimes a homeless man would sleep in the stairwell of the building and he really really stank and I'm not exaggerating, it was horrible, not just BO but like a feces smell. Another time I saw gypsy kids who I think were sniffing glue in the stairwell, I mean people normally don't inhale out of a bag unless they're doing that right? It was a pedestrianized street though so at least it wasn't terrible noisy.

The electricity wasn't grounded so sometimes I would shock myself on the stove and the washing machine. The washing machine was especially problematic because it was in a wet place, once I gave myself quite a shock but I normally just kept it unplugged when I wasn't using it.

For heating it had a huge wall unit that was gas, but I was always afraid to use it thinking it might blow up or something and I heard about people who got killed from leaving the gas on. Whenever I had company they would often turn it on and it actually worked very well, got a little too hot really.

Around the corner was a flat terrace where people hung out laundry and there were always lots of cats that hung out there, at night it was like a chorus with them screeching and moaning. Around the block was a nightclub and you could hear their music, just the beat really, fortunately it wasn't that loud and I only could hear it in the bathroom. I went there once and it was full of prostitutes.

The living room had no windows which I found a bit odd, but the bedroom had really high ceiling which I do kind of miss. I also found a Soviet coin under the fridge and what I think were broken bottles of rat poison or something like that.

Anyway, it was really gritty but not without a bit of charm.

 

[Farm Boy]

I told the landlord about it, and his reply was simply "oh yeah, sorry about that." He told me to use iron out with the laundry. I thought I had found a solution. But alas, the chemical reacted with dyes in my clothes, and turned a bunch of black and blue colored clothes into various shades of purple! Kind of hilarious, but equally destructive to my wardrobe and my wallet. So, after finally realizing the futility of washing clothes there, which I had wanted so badly to do, since I was finally living in a place where I didn't have to pay for laundry machine use, I was forced to pack up my hamper every time I wanted to do laundry, and drive across the county to my parents' house and wash it there. They were happy, of course, to have me around more often again, and it was nice to go "home" so often, but that water situation was a deal-breaker for me. It was the log that broke the camels back, that made sure I wouldn't stay when my lease was up. Too bad, because it was in a supreme location.

Water softeners are just sort of required from what I can tell with most well fed homes. I've had direct wells all my life until recently(my parents still do) and you just need to have one. I'm surprised you didn't mind cleaning stuff with iron out - the fumes from that once you get it wet aren't very good for you at all. I still don't mind the well water itself as much as I hate grubbing around in the well pit with a heatlamp on the coldest days of winter to keep everything from freezing and exploding.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

I can think of one person I know with a well-fed home (I grew up in the country) who has a water softener. They're only required if your water is bad or if you're a wimp and don't like the taste. We might have needed one when I was young, because we had a shallow well also, but instead my parents got a new well that was three times as deep, and all was well.

 

[ace99]

What you can do is to withhold rent and put it into an escrow account until the landlord fixes the condition. Alternatively, you may make the repair yourself and withhold that amount from your rent.

But landlord-tenant laws differ in different states and you should consult an attorney, got to legal services if you can't afford it. You don't want to put yourself in a position where you thought you could withhold because the implied warranty of habitability was breached but found that the condition is insufficiently egregious to qualify.

The first step is to take a look at your lease. There should be a clause there that most states require that the landlord shall conduct repairs and maintenance.

And naturally you shouldn't consider my advice as being legal counsel.

 

[holy king]

My flat mate is still pissing himself laughing after I read him the opening sentence of the OP

?????

Hey yall,
This is a thread for people to share stories about crappy conditions in their apartment or home.

i dont see the humour, sorry...

 

[Farm Boy]

I can think of one person I know with a well-fed home (I grew up in the country) who has a water softener. They're only required if your water is bad or if you're a wimp and don't like the taste. We might have needed one when I was young, because we had a shallow well also, but instead my parents got a new well that was three times as deep, and all was well.

Huh, it's probably just a clothes/shower thing. Water softeners aren't super cheap but they aren't crushingly expensive to operate either. We've always had softened water to all the faucets except the kitchen - so the drinking water isn't softened(adding salt to your drinking water just seems counterproductive ). Naturally, this is all relative to where you live - as the water tables are going to be different. Maybe you have generally cleaner wells in your parts. I just generally figured installing a minor filtration device or softener is a more economical approach then digging more well than you really need for a usually easily solvable issue.

 

[rugbyLEAGUEfan]

My flat mate is still pissing himself laughing after I read him the opening sentence of the OP

?????.

Yeah sorry, that was a little cryptic. My flat mate just laughed as he looked at his surroundings and how apt the OP was when describing our situation.

If I was being generous I'd describe our place as rustic (it's an extremely old building which the owner wants to knock down and build an apartment block but can't get council permission yet. So the rent is dirt cheap on the understanding that we don't expect him to fix stuff).

But I'm sure the local kids are not as generous. I'm sure they think it is the local witches house.

 

[Glassfan]

...While this isn't necessarily a problem, the owner is a little old lady who will not upgrade anything that isn't completely broken.

...It sounds like a jackhammer or a woodpecker that's in the walls. I don't hear it scurry around, but I get woken up every fracking day by the pounding...

Are you certain that's an animal? It sounds more like the water pipes - "water hammer" - banging caused by changes in water pressure in old pipes.

And... Don't complain too much about lazy or absentee landlords. They let you get away with things a more alert or nosey landlord won't.

Landlord is a funny word, ain't it? Like a feudal Baron to whom you owe tithe and military service.

 

[Farm Boy]

Are you certain that's an animal? It sounds more like the water pipes - "water hammer" - banging caused by changes in water pressure in old pipes.

And... Don't complain too much about lazy or absentee landlords. They let you get away with things a more alert or nosey landlord won't.

Landlord is a funny word, ain't it? Like a feudal Baron to whom you owe tithe and military service.

I hadn't thought to much about that. It could also be a loose valve in one of the faucets in the complex.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Are you certain that's an animal? It sounds more like the water pipes - "water hammer" - banging caused by changes in water pressure in old pipes.

And... Don't complain too much about lazy or absentee landlords. They let you get away with things a more alert or nosey landlord won't.

Landlord is a funny word, ain't it? Like a feudal Baron to whom you owe tithe and military service.

While it could be that, I'm not sure it is. If it was, it would probably be going on at different times instead of roughly the same time everynight but I'm going to have it checked out. But thanks for the tip and I'll ask about that too.

I would rather have a 'nosey' landlord if it didn't mean I was paying good money to live in a dump. In fact, a nosey landlord would keep the other apartment dwellers from dumping trash, etc. everywhere which contributes to the roach problem.

It's my first apartment and I had no help selecting it so I really didn't know better.

 

[Farm Boy]

While it could be that, I'm not sure it is. If it was, it would probably be going on at different times instead of roughly the same time everynight but I'm going to have it checked out. But thanks for the tip and I'll ask about that too.

I would rather have a 'nosey' landlord if it didn't mean I was paying good money to live in a dump. In fact, a nosey landlord would keep the other apartment dwellers from dumping trash, etc. everywhere which contributes to the roach problem.

It's my first apartment and I had no help selecting it so I really didn't know better.

Not necessarily. If it's a loose valve on say a shower, your neighbor *might* be taking a shower at the about the same time everyday. That's just speculation though. Water pulses through pipes is really rather loud and mechanical sounding. An animal would probably be less regular.