[RD] I'm transitioning. If you've ever been confused about the T in LGBT, ask me anything

[Manfred Belheim]

However, if the person is going to have the operation, and you truely do like them, I think its only fair to stick around and let them have the oppritunity to show off their correct parts. They have been dreaming of that moment for years themselves, and they would want nothing more than their new field to be plowed.

Okay, that all makes sense. I read your initial post to be talking about having sex now (in whatever form), not holding off for the future. Would you not agree that it would be reasonable to have some sort of time limit though, even if the person in question plans to transition? As in if you're just getting into a relationship with someone, maybe a few months in at most, and you know they intend to transition, but not for 5 years or more while they get through college and then save up some money or something like that? That's a long commitment to make up front, and a long time to go without plowing a field. Plans made that far in advance are likely quite fluid anyway (no pun intended), so to all intents and purposes it would be almost the same as being with someone who's got no definite plans to transition at all. Surely at some point it's reasonable to say "this is not for me" without it qualifying as transphobia to you?

 

[Akka]

That's pretty much what I've been saying all along. I'm not advocating lying about being trans, but if that's so important to you, generic OT user, why don't you just ask?

And then be prepared for the most likely cisgirl slapping you for what could be connotated as a pretty rude question but your funeral

You realize you're kinda answering your own question here, right ?
That's not really something which would be appreciated by most

Also, the chances are extremely low, so obviously it's not really a question that springs to the mind.

 

[Evie]

I know the thread has been left alone for a few weeks, but I figured Here is the best place to say it - as Contre already knows, I've come around to thinking of myself as transgendered too (from my uncertainties earlier in the thread). I've been on the psy waiting list for a month, got the call for my appointments yesterday (on transgendered visibility day, too!).

I'm in this weird mindspace where utter terror - because this is terrifying, delirious joy and incredible peace of mind are all happening at the same time.

 

[Mouthwash]

What are you transitioning from/to? It says male in your information but I don't know whether you changed that after you realized you were trans.

 

[emzie]

I know the thread has been left alone for a few weeks, but I figured Here is the best place to say it - as Contre already knows, I've come around to thinking of myself as transgendered too (from my uncertainties earlier in the thread). I've been on the psy waiting list for a month, got the call for my appointments yesterday (on transgendered visibility day, too!).

I'm in this weird mindspace where utter terror - because this is terrifying, delirious joy and incredible peace of mind are all happening at the same time.

<3

 

[Evie]

Ah, thanks for pointing out the profile thing Mouthwash. I haven't updated it yet; I used to identify (uncomfortably) as a man. Woman is the new normal

 

[shadowplay]

I know the thread has been left alone for a few weeks, but I figured Here is the best place to say it - as Contre already knows, I've come around to thinking of myself as transgendered too (from my uncertainties earlier in the thread). I've been on the psy waiting list for a month, got the call for my appointments yesterday (on transgendered visibility day, too!).

I'm in this weird mindspace where utter terror - because this is terrifying, delirious joy and incredible peace of mind are all happening at the same time.

(hugs) I wish you the best.

 

[Omega124]

I know the thread has been left alone for a few weeks, but I figured Here is the best place to say it - as Contre already knows, I've come around to thinking of myself as transgendered too (from my uncertainties earlier in the thread). I've been on the psy waiting list for a month, got the call for my appointments yesterday (on transgendered visibility day, too!).

I'm in this weird mindspace where utter terror - because this is terrifying, delirious joy and incredible peace of mind are all happening at the same time.

So much hugs direct from me to you. If there is anything I can do for you, please don't hesitate, and ask.

Um, I don't want to steal the thunder from Oda or anything, but I actually had an update myself. Had, because this actually happened in early March, but I never got around to sharing it here. Didn't really feel like bumping the thread for it, but since we are celebrating Oda's wonderful news, mind as well?

I did my very first lecture on the 4th. It was on transgender expressison in the early medieval period, particularly focusing on merovingian francia. The actual lecture went fine, but that's actually not the relevant part. The relevant part is that my sister came to watch me, and I was in girl mode. Probably the first time she saw me in a skirt and what not. So it was a really big deal to me.

She actually tried. She called me a girl a few times, and refrained from using any male-gendered language about me. I actually really appreciated it, and I know it wasnt easy for her. Didnt once call me Megan, but baby steps. I was so happy, and that was the highlight of the day and even month for me (and my birthday was the 12th!)

 

[Evie]

Hugs to you as well, Megan . Glad to hear you got some progress with your sister

 

[Terran Empress]

Congrats Oda, I wish you the best in the future. I don't really have much more going on in my life right now, but I do have a business starting soon (tm) but that's not really related to this thread now is it

 

[Ryika]

Ah, thanks for pointing out the profile thing Mouthwash. I haven't updated it yet; I used to identify (uncomfortably) as a man. Woman is the new normal

(Honest Question that just sounds a bit stupid: )
Will you request a name change for your forum account, or do you disassociate from the male gender of the historical figure?

 

[Evie]

I've been debating it. It IS the name people know me by here, but I haven't really identified with it in years, and even less so now.

Not as bad as all those forums were I use part of my (old) real first name, though.

 

[Omega124]

I've been debating it. It IS the name people know me by here, but I haven't really identified with it in years, and even less so now.

Not as bad as all those forums were I use part of my (old) real first name, though.

You should totes rename yourself to Uesugi Kenshin

 

[JohannaK]

Takeda Shingen or bust.

Now for real, if Kenshin really was a woman, that'd be crazy interesting.

 

[Omega124]

Takeda Shingen or bust.

Now for real, if Kenshin really was a woman, that'd be crazy interesting.

It's practically impossible to prove, there is quite a few holes in the theory, and even if the first two weren't a thing, that would still probably leave Uesugi as a transman if they went out of their way to consciously present themselves like a man for their literal entire life.

But it's still a really cool theory :3

 

[Mouthwash]

I've been debating it. It IS the name people know me by here, but I haven't really identified with it in years, and even less so now.

Not as bad as all those forums were I use part of my (old) real first name, though.

I just know you as the person who isn't proud of their ancestors.

(Seriously, that leaves an impression every time I see you post. The eye is drawn to it.)

 

[Evie]

It is. But it'd still be a male identity, and I wouldn't be more comfortable with that name than my current one

 

[Omega124]

Fair enough, I suggested it more to be funny than anything else.

I'll refrain from more name suggestions to hopefully not spam the thread. If you do actually want help, though, feel free to PM me.

 

[Synobun]

I'm not trans but did go through a bit of an identity crisis many years ago as a result of my upbringing and a general discomfort with being associated with my "bloodline". While it wasn't for an online persona, I did change my IRL name in order to take control of my own identity.

When I did that, I took from material that either inspired me or made me feel better about life (as a concept). My middle name is Benjamin after Benjamin Sisko from Deep Space Nine because the character's perspective on morality and his being forced into a position of divinity (relevant to my cult upbringing) was "inspiring" to me. Likewise, my last name is Kent and I took that from Clark Kent, Superman. I admire the "hidden hero" trope, the person that is everyone's rock but is always ready and prepared to fade away into obscurity. I've often been obsessive over always having an 'out' and minimizing a person's ability to remember me (even my own ability to do so). Deep Space Nine and Smallville kept me grounded in my darkest moments so that's what I took from.

If you've come to identify with your online persona, my recommendation would be to look at material that helped you process the realization that you were trans. It doesn't have to be trans material, of course, but something that made you feel safe or more confident in the new path you're forging for yourself.

 

[Evie]

Update : I've officially got a psy to help me through this. Need to make sure my wonderful Canadian health insurance is in order so they can cover the hormones when it comes to that.

Could be as little as 3-4 meetings before she refers me. Could be more. Depend on a variety of factors.