Let's Talk About Death

[Richard Cribb]

Huh. is there a reason that the mostly first world users on this forum are plopping down like 50-60 as age to die, gien the access to modern medicine and just general statistics on life expectancy?

I know lot's of family history stuff, etc, that is personal, but most economically developed places are somewhere in the 70s (often upper 70s). Rough guess after 5 seconds of googling is heavy smokers may have ~1 decade less, but can recover a lot of that if they quite smoking before 40.

I don't think the cfc population is a bunch of obese packaday smokers, for the most part. And although medical conditions can strike anyone and any time (eg cancer can develop in perfectly healthy young people, etc), it's not statistically likely.

Yes speaking for myself there is a reason, but there is only so much personal information I want to reveal publically. Sufficient to say that I am far from being an "obese packaday smoker", (I never smoked in my whole life, I don't drink alcohol, I live on quite a healthy diet) but I have a number of chronical medical issues which not only make every day full of annoyance, but also potentially exciting. I was actually close to expire last, and something one learns from being a professional patient is that modern medicine to the extent one can afford it is impressive but can't perform miracles. I was asked to guess. As it is my habit to have quite low expectations of most things, I just imagined that living for 10 more years is realistic. Which doesn't mean that I am not hoping for more.

 

[Traitorfish]

1) Do you fear death?

Yes.

1a) Why do you fear death

Horror of non-being.

2) Do you feel you lived a full life if you died tomorrow?

Probably not.

3) Do you believe in an afterlife?

Nope.

4) If you died tomorrow what would your biggest regret be?

Chronic indecisiveness.

5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?

Recent family history offers precedents from fifty to ninety, so I couldn't say.

6) Have you ever seen someone die?

No.

7) Do you think modern civilizations reduction of exposure to death is a good thing? (i.e., most people die in hospitals and not at home etc)

I'm not sure.

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)

Devoured by carrion-birds. That's not a joke, for the record, I really am quite impressed by the practice, because although it seems morbid, I think that it's really quite a powerful affirmation of life.

9) If you somehow knew that you were to die on a desert island and nobody would ever find your remains, would that bother you?

No, unless I'd put particular effort into dying in an amusing pose.

10) If you had a memorial or tombstone with a message for the following generations, what would it say?

"Grave before shave", with a picture of a bearded skull. Gotta have your principles, ken?

 

[Hygro]

URL="http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/Calvin/Snowman15.jpg"]Horror of non-being.[/URL]

That's really it.

And the smaller fear of horror of forever-existence.

 

[Terxpahseyton]

I think the horror of forever-existence is relatively easy to deal with.
Don't think about it.
This is also the standard approach to deal with the horror of non-existence I'd say, but it works not so good with death because death means abrupt change.
Forever-existence on the other hand means things stay the same, so it is easier to just not think about it.

Just as in general things which don't change get less attention by us.

So I'd argue that the horror of forever-existence is not so much a natural instinct as the horror of non-existence but merely someone overthinking it.

 

[Tee Kay]

1) I don't fear death. I fear the pain that I'd experience immediately before death, but not death itself.

2) No, I wouldn't feel I've lived a full life.

3) I'd like to say I'm open to the possibility of an afterlife, but no, no to be honest I don't believe it that anymore.

4) I'd regret that I had to live.

5) Maybe 80-ish if I don't kill myself first; otherwise, within the next five years is a good bet.

6) I was there when my grandmother passed.

7) Sure.

8) Donated, then cremated.

9) Yes, actually. I'd want to leave a message to people I knew.

10) I'm not thinking that far ahead.

 

[El_Machinae]

It bothers me more knowing that my loved ones are gone forever. They're not just 'away', they're 'lost'.

 

[CavLancer]

You will be surprised.

 

[El_Machinae]

Not if I can help it.

 

[Traitorfish]

"'Asleep'? I don't think so. Dead. Gone. Absent. ****ing inert."

(nsfwish language)

 

[Leifmk]

1) Do you fear death?
1a) Why do you fear death?

Not in and of itself. I do have some fear of the process of dying, depending on what form it takes.

2) Do you feel you lived a full life if you died tomorrow?

No. I have young kids and I need to be around to raise them.

3) Do you believe in an afterlife?

No. We were nothing before we were born, we will be nothing again. Anything else is wishful thinking.

4) If you died tomorrow what would your biggest regret be?

Not being around to raise my kids.

5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?

Judging from family history, either pretty young (lots and lots of otherwise healthy men dropping dead from heart attacks or strokes in their 50s or early 60s), or else pretty old (past 90). Betting on the latter, barring accident, since I believe I have a pretty good handle on why all those relatives died young (a particular genetic weakness to high cholesterol levels, which is fairly easy to control).

6) Have you ever seen someone die?

No. Have visited elderly relatives on their deathbed but never happened to be present during the last moments.

7) Do you think modern civilizations reduction of exposure to death is a good thing? (i.e., most people die in hospitals and not at home etc)

No particular opinion.

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)

Donate whatever may be useful, burn the rest.

9) If you somehow knew that you were to die on a desert island and nobody would ever find your remains, would that bother you?

Not particularly, except for the missing closure for my family.

10) If you had a memorial or tombstone with a message for the following generations, what would it say?

I wouldn't want one.

 

[warpus]

1) Do you fear death?

I fear the act of dying. I fear the act of other people, who I love, dying.

Does that mean I am afraid of death? I guess I'm not sure because there are a couple ways to interpret 'death'. I am not afraid of death in general.

1a) Why do you fear death?

Because dying would probably hurt... a lot! Plus it would hurt people who love me emotionally after the fact.

2) Do you feel you lived a full life if you died tomorrow?

Yes and no. For one, I would be unable to see all the amazing (and stupid) human accomplishments of the future. I want to see humans on mars and all, so if I died before that happened that would suck.

On the other hand I would be happy with the things I've accomplished and the places I've been and seen. But I would leave this planet without an heir, which while I am childfree by choice and might continue this for a while yet.. it still doesn't feel 'complete'.

3) Do you believe in an afterlife?

No, I've seen no reason to believe that one might exist. I am open to the idea, but nobody's ever been able to budge me from my "There's no reason to think that an afterlife exists" position.

4) If you died tomorrow what would your biggest regret be?

To be honest, probably not acting on a couple love interests. Maybe not having kids? Who knows.

5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?

82.

6) Have you ever seen someone die?

Only in online videos.

7) Do you think modern civilizations reduction of exposure to death is a good thing? (i.e., most people die in hospitals and not at home etc)

I don't know about that, but I think people need to talk about death more. It shouldn't be a taboo subject.

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)

I want to be flown into the sun.

9) If you somehow knew that you were to die on a desert island and nobody would ever find your remains, would that bother you?

Only because that implies that it would hurt dying - and that's the one thing I'm most afraid of wrt death.

10) If you had a memorial or tombstone with a message for the following generations, what would it say?

"You only live once, make the best of it. Don't be afraid of failure and don't be a jerk. BBL"

 

[Mechanicalsalvation]

1) Do you fear death?
Yes and no. I fear death as a untimely force snatching me away from the world stage. I welcome death as a way to rest when my time is due.
1a) Why do you fear death?
Becouse its merciless even though its just.


2) Do you feel you lived a full life if you died tomorrow?
I do have some sense of fulfilment but if compared to what I think can be achieved its next to nothing.

3) Do you believe in an afterlife?
Yes, existence continues after the death of physical life. Our limited individual human consciousness is part of an infinite and immortal reality. The game goes on...

4) If you died tomorrow what would your biggest regret be?
I dont believe in regret but in detachment. But I suppose my worst sin is wasting time...


5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?
Around seventy sounds like a good time to go. If I am in the decent shape I will hope for longer life though.

6) Have you ever seen someone die?
My grandpa is currently in the proces of very long and slow departure...
7) Do you think modern civilizations reduction of exposure to death is a good thing? (i.e., most people die in hospitals and not at home etc)
Any society which avoids reality is bound for decadence and destruction. There is nothing wrong with it. Its natural process.

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)
Handled with care...

9) If you somehow knew that you were to die on a desert island and nobody would ever find your remains, would that bother you?
That sound more scarry then death itself. I must make sure never to travel to far off places and deset islands

10) If you had a memorial or tombstone with a message for the following generations, what would it say?
Something nice and inspiring but I dont really care for such a thing....

 

[Narz]

+1,000

Glad you like.

5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?

Between 20-25.

Why so early?

5) Maybe 80-ish if I don't kill myself first; otherwise, within the next five years is a good bet.

Why would you kill yourself?

We should really have a CFC-suicide prevention thread.

It bothers me more knowing that my loved ones are gone forever. They're not just 'away', they're 'lost'.

Yes it sucks. My best friend killed himself at age 25, really awful. For many months I had frequent dreams he was still alive but at the end of his rope & the whole dream revolved around me trying to save him (trying to find out where he was, get a hold of him on the phone, convince him to meet me, penetrate his depression). These were nightmares I guess you could say but more depressing than terrifying.

 

[Synobun]

Why so early?

Health.

 

[Narz]

You have a disease that will kill you in the next few years?

 

[Synobun]

You have a disease that will kill you in the next few years?

Either kill me or make the rest of my life an excruciating and miserable experience, yes.

 

[MilesGregarius]

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)
Buried under a fruit tree that feeds me family. On my property, not at a gravesite.

+1,000

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)
Stick me in the ground and plant a tree on top of me. Preferably a mango, a zapote, or a sapodilla. Maybe an avocado.

Glad you like.

I've been thinking this way for some years. You're the first person besides myself I've encountered with the same idea.

 

[El_Machinae]

Yes it sucks. My best friend killed himself at age 25, really awful. For many months I had frequent dreams he was still alive but at the end of his rope & the whole dream revolved around me trying to save him (trying to find out where he was, get a hold of him on the phone, convince him to meet me, penetrate his depression). These were nightmares I guess you could say but more depressing than terrifying.

That sucks. It sucks that he perceived his life that way, such that he decided to kill himself.

 

[CavLancer]

1) Do you fear death?
No

1a) Why do you fear death?
I don't, but dying looks like it may have some pretty steep downsides, or not. Its like the proverbial door. Everyone ends up at the door and there one gets something like a Monopoly card from the stack. It says how you will die.
Some get to have a heart attack while sleeping, its like a get out of jail free card. Some suffer a terrible death and many are somewhere in between. Everyone goes through the door eventually, that's the good part.

2) Do you feel you lived a full life if you died tomorrow?
Yes

3) Do you believe in an afterlife?
I know its true. Had an experience in my 20s where I was really low, prayed, and was filled with a spirit of love beyond description. Such knowledge really helps. Of the thousands of people I've described it to 3 have accepted it, the rest don't, or worse, think I'm lying. I'm not.

4) If you died tomorrow what would your biggest regret be?
Miss the kids we're adopting, want many years with my wife. Then there's little stuff, want to finish the pizza oven and open our business, see it a success before I go. A future for the kids...

5) If you had to guess, what age will you die?
I'm 56...maybe 70? Who knows?

6) Have you ever seen someone die?
Yes

7) Do you think modern civilizations reduction of exposure to death is a good thing? (i.e., most people die in hospitals and not at home etc)
No

8) How do you want your body to be handled after death? (cremation, buried, etc)
Whatever makes the wife feel better.

9) If you somehow knew that you were to die on a desert island and nobody would ever find your remains, would that bother you?
It would bother me to die without my family, but no to the remains bit.

10) If you had a memorial or tombstone with a message for the following generations, what would it say?
'Dust lies here, I'm so gone.'

 

[Pegasus_77]

My life is hugely unfulfilled and I have a lot to do.
I want at least one beautiful girlfriend to further fulfill my life. I want to be rich. I want to be healthy all life long.