“Melancholy nostalgia: They auditioned hundreds of elcor. I made it all the way through the auditions, callback after callback. Seeking praise: I look the part, don’t I? I’m properly big and imposing, old but not frail, warm and fatherly. I’ve got it all. Mr. Francis Kitt went with a younger actor in the end. Jaded bitterness: Don’t they always? But I was assured by the studio that I was absolutely their second choice. With defiant certainty: He might have been younger, but he didn’t love Hamlet more. No one does. Conspiratorially: I do not believe that Shakespeare wrote it. I do not believe any human wrote it.” Yorrik was not accustomed to speaking or thinking this quickly. An elcor’s life was large and long. They could afford to consider. And reconsider. And reconsider their reconsiderations. They did not share with outsiders. They did not make small talk. But now, fueled by revival drugs, Yorrik’s intellect moved at the speed of an overstimulated salarian. He could not stop himself. “With disdain: I have met many humans. They move fast, shoot quickly, speak carelessly. Withheld revelation: Hamlet has the soul of an elcor. He cannot decide. He must deliberate for a long, long time. With excitement: Do you not think the famous line, ‘Accusatory: Eyes without feeling, feeling without sight, ears without hands or eyes, smelling sans all’ could describe the sensory organs of my people? We have four feet but no hands,” Yorrik lifted one massive foreleg and flexed his long, thick, soft gray three-fingered toes to demonstrate, “and our eyes are weak in comparison to our sense of smell. Why else would Hamlet say, ‘Wry awareness of double meaning: You shall nose him as you go up the stairs?’ Humans cannot even tell their mothers from a batarian war beast with their puny noses. Additionally, Dennmaark sounds far more elcor than human. Some have theorized it is a bastardized form of Dekuuna. Bashful admission: By some, I mean me. I have theorized that. With deep spiritual certainty: There is no possibility that it was written on Earth. Thoughtful speculation: Perhaps, if Hamlet had had an elcor combat VI system, he could have run a simulation, and been more confident of the correct choice. Confidential whisper: Yorrik is not my real name. I was born Naumm, in New Elfaas on the planet of Ekuna, a very respectable, very serviceable, very plain name. I changed it, to honor the greatest play ever written. Quiet desperation: To remind myself of my dream. In Andromeda, there will be no Francis Kitt to cast a younger elcor. There will be Yorrik, and many people thirsty for entertainment. With fierce ambition: I spent my time on Hephaestus Station writing elcor Macbeth, which is not quite as good as Hamlet but has a higher kill count among the dramatis personae. It is sixteen hours long. The Nexus will love it, I am certain.”