God: IN THE BEGINNING...
God: THERE WAS NOTHING!
Reg: No, no, no, you've got your screen all fluppy. Try a bit of the vertical knob.
Reg: No. Not quite.
Reg: Nope. That's back to how it was before. Look, will you let me try it?
God: WELL IT'S MY TELE.
Reg (under his breath): Then you might want to learn how to use it.
God: I HEARD THAT!
Reg: There! Look you've got it.
God: IN THE BEGINNING...
Reg: You already said that.
God: YES, I KNOW. I JUST FIGURED...
Reg: Is there any way we can get on with this? I
am in a bit of a hurry. Beginning of history and all...
God: YOU THINK IT'S SO EASY, WHY DON'T YOU DO IT THEN?
[Sound from the clouds of a door slamming shut]
Reg: Right, where were we? Oh yes, that's right. [Reg shuffles through the script] Beginning...star...wise men. Ah! Wise men. There were Three Wise Men!
Mr. Big Nose: Hey! There's four, I count!
Reg: Oh, bugger off, Big Nose. Look, we can't bloody well go around calling them the
Four Wise Men, else we'd have to find 'em another gift. Frankensesce, Gold, Myrh. One, two, three. What'd'ya wanna give the baby, Big Nose, your sock? Didn't bloody well think so. Now who's running this show? You or me? I say Three Wise Men and you bloody better just nod that big bloody nose of yours in agreement. If I didn't have a bad back...
Mrs. Big Nose: Will you just shut up? I've got to get to the stoning later. Look, you did Beginning, you did the Star, you did the Three [Mr. Big Nose: Four, dear] Four Wise Men. Isn't it about time you got to the baby.
Reg: Oh f--k off!
[Reg storms off. Sound from the clouds of a door slamming shut.]
Mrs. Big Nose: F--k it. Let's go to the stonin'. I'm sure the wise men will find the right baby without us.
God: TO BE CONTINUED...