Relationship deal-breakers....

[Che Guava]

I simple question for you today: What's your relationship deal-breaker?

If you were looking for someone to have a long-term relationship (marriage, for eg), and found someone that suited you well in looks, personality and interests, what would the least they have to say to make it clear in your mind that this could NEVER be the person for you....


Keep i mind I said 'least'. Yes, I know that you probably wouldn't date someone with a history of serial killings, but would a different religion be a deal-breaker? political leanings? snoring? says 'like' too much?

 

[Bozo Erectus]

Not willing to put up with my nonsense and leaving me would defintely be my deal breaker.

Couldnt care less about religion and political leanings, and someone being able to snore louder than me would violate the laws of physics.

 

[thetrooper]

"I've been to Ayia Napa at least a dozen times".

A long history of promiscuity would be enough to turn away.

 

[Alpine Trooper]

"Im a man"

 

[Che Guava]

"Im a man"

That's the least? You must have a high tolerance for people....

 

[JohnRM]

Anything involving...

being unfaithful
abusing drugs/alcohol
wanton violence
facist or socialist ideology
a tabacco smoker


...thats a good start.

 

[IglooDame]

- past infidelity
- emotional game-playing
- inability to trust
- cruel to animals
- rude to people
- irresponsible

Obviously, the earlier in the relationship that one of these come up, the less serious it has to be to be a deal-breaker.

 

[PrinceOfLeigh]

Over 10 unanswered text messages on any given day.
3 if there's a Cup Final on.

 

[Che Guava]

Interesting stuff. I think past promiscuity might be a factor in my decision, but i wouldn't be a deal-breaker. The thing I can't handle is persistent negativity. Drives me insane!!!!

An additional question: are there any secret/less-noble dealbreakers you have? For eg, years ago when I was dating an indian girl (I'm white), I had a few friends of mine admit to me that they wouldn't have started a relationship with someone of a different race because they were afraid things would get too complicated with family, church, etc.....

 

[thetrooper]

Less noble: you look at her mother and realize how she will look in 30 years.

 

[Che Guava]

too true...!

 

[Richard Cribb]

General dishonesty first and foremost. Certain political leanings would be difficult. Promiscuity doesn't matter - I haven't been a saint myself.

Less noble: you look at her mother and realize how she will look in 30 years.

I have no reason to worry about that.

 

[ComradeDavo]

I couldn't be with a conservative or a christian/muslim/etc. Just wouldn't work.

 

[IglooDame]

Less noble? Well, if she's flat-chested, I wouldn't have considered an intimate relationship with her in the first place, does that count?

 

[PrinceOfLeigh]

Sorry, smoking gets the boot from me. Can't stand the smell

 

[Leifmk]

Interesting stuff. I think past promiscuity might be a factor in my decision, but i wouldn't be a deal-breaker. The thing I can't handle is persistent negativity. Drives me insane!!!!

Past promiscuity would be a non-issue for me at least as long as there were no secondary consequences to deal with such as STDs. In fact I'd feel flattered by someone with many previous partners wanting to settle down with me. Fidelity while in a committed relationship is a must, so a pattern of infidelity would be a problem.

Persistent negativity would make the relationship a non-go under the "suited you well in ... personality..." clause from the original post. In fact given the parameters set forth in the original post I'd have to say that about the only things that would be dealbreakers would be irreconcilable differences in the religious/political arena. It's not as if my partner would have to share my opinions in all matters (as indeed my actual lady does not), but any differences must be such that mutual respect can be maintained. I'd not sleep easy next to an Idiot Party voter...

 

[Zuffox]

Original list:

• Islamofobic - the racist way - with derogatory comments.
• Brags, mentions every little personal victory such as good grades, praise from teachers, friends or family. Overly exhibitionistic tendencies.
• PMS all the time, voluntarily gets involved in fights - with others as well as me - being the grubler that she is.
• Constantly keeps trash-talking people, friends, family, what have you - especially when it's over nothing, because she has a habit of overanalyzing.

Added afterwards:

• If she made remarks about me being bad at og neglecting something, unless it was said in a humorous tone instead of downright critisizing.
• Cruel to animals.
• Making me choose between her and another (here I of course don't mean in terms of mistress or lover, but familty, friend etc.), when there is no logical reason to have to make a choice.

 

[Grisu]

a quick temper, I just can't cope with people who get angry just because I said the wrong word or something like that. They scare me.

women who 'like' fighting too, couldn't have that.

 

[silver 2039]

If she's not into S&M and I can't get my sexual fulfillement. Also she has to be...well whippable for lack of better word, that means good looking generally and rounded, plump, buttocks. Thats important....its not required but I would like it if she was white, I like how white girls go red...haha

Oh yah I can't stand any fundie of any sort be it related to political ideology or religon or whatever.

 

[Rambuchan]

Soap opera addict. Actually, that'd give me some time to myself...
Shopping freak. So would that...
Bad cook. I'm pretty good myself.
Snoring. I sleep like a log.

Errrr. I'd have to settle with Smelly Feet I think. Is that 'least' enough?

Silver: It's easy to get 'persuasive' in the heat of the moment.