Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[Verarde]

This angers me. I put hits out on all my old contacts.

 

[Terrance888]

I transfer my consciousness into one of the dudes I killed, since it is still fresh. Try to get that guy I killed by punching his heart so hard it stopped, because I just need a battery to start it up again.

 

[Skwink]

I set out on a quest to become King of India.

 

[hoplitejoe]

I launch a communist invasion of Dubai!

 

[Dhoomstriker]

The Master, being tipped off by some of the rebels, leads the rebels to Samuel North's location, where he attempts to revive Samuel North.

Spoiler :

My wife gives birth to the heir of the Kingdom.

8 (9): Wait a few months.

Mmmm, that roll was a good one--otherwise the "heir" most likely wouldn't have been yours! :O

 

[EnglishCrusader]

Hmm... I bring back Darth Caesar to serve me.

 

[landlubber]

I apply to join the UN.

 

[Abaddon]

I let it be known what I want.. my infamy means it happens.. I obtain Boundless' cloak.

 

[GenMarshall]

I heal myself to full health (again).

Geeze, stop hurting me because I am inactive.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I shake off my guilt and tell him to allow free elections, because I have to photos of something his wife would be a little "mad" to see, and not afraid to mail them to her.

20 (17): He promptly hangs up, but it seems to work; the country announces a return to "free, fair" elections.

This angers me. I put hits out on all my old contacts.

18: And thus you consolidate your power, collecting royalties worth $38 every turn.

I transfer my consciousness into one of the dudes I killed, since it is still fresh. Try to get that guy I killed by punching his heart so hard it stopped, because I just need a battery to start it up again.

13 (9): That might just be crazy enough... to be completely unfeasible.

I set out on a quest to become King of India.

6 (5): LOOK OUT TERRISIS!!
ROLL TO DODGE!
15 (14): You bust some combat moves on his ass and give his gun to your wife.

I launch a communist invasion of Dubai!

12 (14): The initial blitz is a success, tovarishsh!

The Master, being tipped off by some of the rebels, leads the rebels to Samuel North's location, where he attempts to revive Samuel North.

12: The Master and some bodyguards track him down to Texas.

I apply to join the UN.

7: Drat! You're not a sovereign state!

I let it be known what I want.. my infamy means it happens.. I obtain Boundless' cloak.

2 (5): They can't find it!

I heal myself to full health (again).

5: Turns out those herbs weren't edible after all. You lose 6 hitpoints.

 

[Red_Spy]

I call the rebel leader and tell him free elections are in place.

 

[GenMarshall]

...I seek out a medicine man in the group I encounter to heal me.

 

[landlubber]

I draft a constitution specifically labeling my holdings as a sovereign state.

 

[Boundless]

nevemind!

 

[Abaddon]

I endure a longer search, really leaning my infamy on a few select people...get me that cloak!

 

[Verarde]

I continue growing my massive advertising empire.

 

[Terrance888]

The Alien Medallion spills a liquid on me, transforming me into a perfectly healthy alien!

 

[Dhoomstriker]

The Master, being evil and all, gives Samuel North a good hard pinch.

 

[CivCube]

I begin my search for Darth Caesar's remains...under the pretense of anthropology.

 

[EnglishCrusader]

You missed mine!