So you're in love with your best friend, Part Deux

[Nylan]

Wouldn't have done that ^^. Talking to the best friend normally gets me nowhere.

Sorry to hear that

everyone needs someone they can talk to

 

[Kozmos]

Cheezy have you dreamed of her? In my experience this is usually the worst phase when the woman-friend penetrates your complicated mental shielding and enters your dreams. You are denied your only refuge and she is constantly on your mind.

After that, when the dreams go away the whole thing kind of fades away.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Cheezy have you dreamed of her? In my experience this is usually the worst phase when the woman-friend penetrates your complicated mental shielding and enters your dreams. You are denied your only refuge and she is constantly on your mind.

After that, when the dreams go away the whole thing kind of fades away.

All the time. It's never been one of "those" dreams groucho, often we're just there, together, doing something, like walking down the street, or just sitting together. But regardless, they are always good dreams, they are my favorite dreams. I am always happy the day after a dream about her, and always wake well-rested, you know, with that ready-to-jump-out-of-bed, carpe diem attitude.

 

[Kozmos]

Yes mine too havent been of kind.

 

[Shylock]

it can mean the world to a girl, even if you've done everything not to break down.

Or they'll bring the whole world down upon you for even daring to suggest you have any kind of feelings.

You can't win this one.

 

[Jawz II]

I said it once in the last thread and Ill say it again: This is a lose-lose situation.

Cut your losses and get out right now. Youre like a fat kid who cant eat any candy, but still keeps hanging around some delicious candy, all day every day = Torture.

You will just end up hating her for not loving you back. There are many more out there, and belive it or not, likely better looking/nicer/smarter ones too.


STOP WASTING YOUR TIME AND GET OUT RIGHT NOW!

Ps. Im speaking from personal experience, I spent a whole year chasing this one girl, and she was only using me to inflate her own ego.

 

[Brighteye]

Are you sure it's not just the love of a friend that you're feeling? Might you not just really like her as a friend?
Go and date other girls, but don't think of them as competition or replacements for your friend. Think of them as potential new friends who you might like as much, eventually.
Just imagine how much fun life would be if you could have double the amount of time spent with people you feel this way about!
If you're dating other girls, or even if you just go on a few dates, it'll also stop your friend feeling intimidated or worried by your love for her (if she does). She'll be more relaxed if she knows that you're at least dating. It's only polite to do this: it's for her, after all.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Okay, so an update on the situation. Rather, the resolution, my Final Solution to the whole deal.

I said that I asked the best friend about it, and what she told me. Well, if you read the first thread about this, you'd remember the old ex boyfriend (and my old best friend). He's still around. In fact, I found out today that, not only are the dating again, but she's pregnant by him.

Now, by the time I found out about the pregnancy, I had already come to my decision about what to do.

However, after I found out about her going back to the ex again, I had a strange realization. I can't win. I had always hoped that I could be friends with her, with the understanding that I would never act on my feelings, and that those feelings would eventually go away. I realize now that this is not possible. As long as I'm with her, these feelings will continue to come back, I will continue to relapse, and I will never make any sort of progress.

She is a drama magnet, and I don't need it in my life. I don't need her in my life. I should have known better the first time around; the moment that you and the other person are not on the same page affection-wise, it's already over. I'm only now realizing this, but I'm not a fool enough to close my ears and scream "it's not true!" just because I don't like what I have realized, what I have to do. It's the right thing to do, and it's the best thing to do, for me, and for her.

So today, for the first time in a long time, I am emotionally free! It feels great.

That, folks, is how you resolve an OT girl advice thread. Game, set, match.

 

[Shylock]

Okay, so an update on the situation. Rather, the resolution, my Final Solution to the whole deal.

I said that I asked the best friend about it, and what she told me. Well, if you read the first thread about this, you'd remember the old ex boyfriend (and my old best friend). He's still around. In fact, I found out today that, not only are the dating again, but she's pregnant by him.

Now, by the time I found out about the pregnancy, I had already come to my decision about what to do.

However, after I found out about her going back to the ex again, I had a strange realization. I can't win. I had always hoped that I could be friends with her, with the understanding that I would never act on my feelings, and that those feelings would eventually go away. I realize now that this is not possible. As long as I'm with her, these feelings will continue to come back, I will continue to relapse, and I will never make any sort of progress.

She is a drama magnet, and I don't need it in my life. I don't need her in my life. I should have known better the first time around; the moment that you and the other person are not on the same page affection-wise, it's already over. I'm only now realizing this, but I'm not a fool enough to close my ears and scream "it's not true!" just because I don't like what I have realized, what I have to do. It's the right thing to do, and it's the best thing to do, for me, and for her.

So today, for the first time in a long time, I am emotionally free! It feels great.

That, folks, is how you resolve an OT girl advice thread. Game, set, match.

No, this is how you end an OT girl advice thread.

Ok, I'm ending an OT girl advice thread.

Take that

Anyway, good show on walking away from it. Some women are just idiots who will go back to whatever loser they've always had, and get knocked up to boot.

 

[Nylan]

Considering the situation, you did the right thing (ex bf pushed it out of "just friends" possibilities)

"you are now free to move about the country"

 

[Prince_Imrahil]

And This is how you spam... but I shouldnt lest I get banned... So Congratz Cheezy for getting out of that situation. Less baggage next time.

 

[Shylock]

Being emotionally free feels good doesn't it?

I can't wait till graduation. No more entanglements for me, for a little while.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Considering the situation, you did the right thing (ex bf pushed it out of "just friends" possibilities)

"Just friends" stopped being a possibility six months ago, when I voiced my feelings for her, and she did not return them in magnitude. It wasn't until just now that I realized that, and acted on it.

 

[Nylan]

Point is, you're free and rightly so

Go forth and prosper

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Go forth and prosper

Didn't God say something like that to the Isrealites, when he wanted them to make lots of babies to populate Palestine?

 

[CaptainF]

Yay you!

 

[ComradeDavo]

I fancied the hell of my best female friend. The feeling was not mutual though, as I have learned these past couple of days.....

 

[Rossiya]

Sounds like a good conclusion to have Cheez. You have done well.

 

[Winner]

Good for you. At least you're clear on what you feel. At least you feel something to someone. Anything is better than to feel nothing.

 

[Azale]

Good job! Wish I was as strong as you, I'm clearly not. This seems to be a common problem...