Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Phew! Took me a while to write that. Now I can actually start playing the game! 
The Renewal
- Thread starter Verarde
- Start date
Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Very interesting update Verarde! I look forward to more when the time comes.
Fixed.
Announcement: My new laptop literally arrived today, so it will take me a few days to get it all set up (hopefully I can install civ3 with no issues, glad there are walkthroughs here). In the meantime I'll be writing some more, and then I can get playing!
CELTICEMPIRE
Zulu Conqueror
good update.
Very interesting update Verarade
EDIT: :facepalm: managed to spell his name wrong... my fault.
You edited it to say you spelled Verarde's name wrong but didn't fix it?
Optical
The Fall of the Eleventh
Subpost, this looks awesome Verarde!
tR1cKy
taking over the world
A post apocalyptic America, nice idea for a story, let's see how it develops.
A hint: try to space better your paragraphs, if they're too clumped readability worsens. 'Blood and Iron' is a good example, although it tends, from time to time, to an excess in the opposite way. Vanadorn and Sisiutil are the real masters here.
A hint: try to space better your paragraphs, if they're too clumped readability worsens. 'Blood and Iron' is a good example, although it tends, from time to time, to an excess in the opposite way. Vanadorn and Sisiutil are the real masters here.
Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Thanks General Olaf, and thanks to all who have been supportive so far!Subpost, this looks awesome Verarde!
tR1cKy himself has come down to visit us?
Thanks for the tip. It looks better in MS Word, but next update I'll try to space the paragraphs more. If I have time later today, I'll go back and edit the first two updates for better readability. And announcement: C3C was successfully installed, no issues as of yet. My documents, including the file containing 3000+ words of The Renewal has also been successfully transferred over. I'll be spending this weekend writing and playing, and hopefully have an update by the end of the week.
Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Chapter Three - Salmon
These events took place 23 hours later.
The ceremonial robe didn't quite fit. It had been made for a larger man, and Gordan wasn't quite sure it had been meant for him. It was deeply dyed with the stains of berries, and it had been dried in the sun. The colors had literally baked on to whatever material made up the robe.
That showed how unqualified he really was for this job. How could he make deals with nations and tribes when he couldn't even name the material that made his robe? He knew he had to work hard at this job, or everything could go up in smoke.
His thoughts turned to the tribe he was to meet later that day. They knew so little about them. The Americans did not even know their name, let alone their culture, their way of life--or whether they were hostile or not. Gordan could only hope that the lavishness they were presenting would sufficiently awe them. It would have to. This was the upper limits of the American luxury, and if this entourage didn't impress the native tribe, nothing would.
Daniel came into Gordan's tent, pushing the flap aside. A silence passed between them as Daniel examined Gordan for imperfections. Anything out of place might deter this meeting from a good standpoint into a possible failure.
Finally Daniel nodded his approval. "I think you're ready."
Gordan still felt tense, and Daniel noted this. "Well, perhaps on the outside, you are. But on the inside? That's what truly matters. If you let your nervousness show, the tribe's leaders will pick up on it, make no mistake. And from that, they will be less apt to consider anything that you may have to say. So, breathe. And remember to keep doing that."
Gordan smiled. "So, is there a specific strategy that you want me to follow?"
Daniel shook his head. "No. In fact, all I want you to do is introduce yourself, who we are, and our intentions of settling to their north. From there, see what their actions are. Let them make the first move.
"Alright," said Gordan.
"I have the utmost confidence in you, Gordan. You can make our tribe a great example, and it starts with meeting these locals. Now go. Jonathen and his men are waiting."
After a subtle push, Gordan found himself outside. The late summer's hot air made the robe even more uncomfortable. Stifling a yawn brought on by the early morning, Gordan made his way to where Jonathen's scout squad stood ready to venture into the unknown.
Daniel leaned over Gordan's shoulder and whispered. "I think you should say a few words before you leave."
Expectant faces turned to Gordan. He cleared his suddenly dry throat, trying to find words that would give these men confidence in abilities he wasn't too sure he had.
"Friends...this is a journey that may build us up or tear us down. Rest assured I will be doing my part to see that it is the former. I hope you will do your part as well. I...have the utmost confidence in you." Gordan could almost feel Daniel rolling his eyes behind him. But the small words worked, and the men applauded vigorously as Gordan passed between them to take the lead at the head of their formation. Jonathen shook hands with Daniel and then with Gordan, who then shook hands with Daniel.
Then they were off.
These events are estimated to be about a day later.
They had camped the previous night in a small grove of trees and had spent the better part of the morning slowly making their way towards the dwelling places of the tribe, taking great care to show that their presence was anything but hostile. Now they were in the center of the group of small cottages, and a growing crowd of curious onlookers began to form. Gordan saw one of his men let his hand draw close to his side, where it appeared that he had stowed a weapon of some kind. Gordan's eyes met Jonathen's. He had seen this as well and stepped to the side of the man, whispering something into his ears. The man's eyes widened, and his hand visibly moved away from his side.
Now the crowd was parting, creating a channel in which a man was coming through. Gordan straightened. This must be their leader, he thought.
The man coming toward them was tall, with short black hair and a well-worn face that didn't signify weakness as much as it did wisdom and strength. He had darker skin, but so did all the people. The one thing that marked him from all the others was the sheer amount of feathers adorning the band tied around his head. Some of the men accompanying him also had feathers, but none had as many. Gordan felt a nudge from Jonathen and stepped forward to assert his role as leader of the expedition.
Holding his hands out in front of him, palms facing the leader in order to signify peaceful intentions, he intoned: "We are Americans. I am Gordan."
The leader said something unintelligible in return. Gordan's hopes for an easy conversation began to waver but were renewed as quickly when the leader pointed to himself, saying, "Tyee."
Gordan pointed to the man. "Tyee?" He nodded. Gordan pointed to himself. "Gordan."
These events then took place 30 minutes later.
Gordan sat inside the chief's tent, which he had pointed to and said, "Tepee." The two of them were trying to teach each other words of their languages. A meal sat before them, consisting of greens and a type of fish Gordan had never seen. It had pink flesh, and Gordan made motions asking what it was called. "Salmon," replied Tyee.
"Tastes pretty nice," said Jonathen, and he gave Tyee a thumbs up. Tyee smiled in recognition of the sign and returned one himself. "So far, this has been going pretty well, eh Gordan?"
Gordan nodded. He turned to Tyee. "Water?"
Tyee's brow furrowed. It was clear that he wasn't sure what Gordan wanted. Gordan pantomimed drinking. The eyes widened, and Tyee stood up from where he was seated, and left the tent. Jonathen shrugged at Gordan. "Wonder what's up with him?"
Tyee soon returned with three large jars and an equal amount of cups. He proffered one to Gordan while taking the first jar and placing it in front of Gordan. He pointed to the cup, then pantomimed dipping the cup and drinking. Gordan nodded and smiled in acknowledgement. He took his cup and, retrieving the dark liquid inside, put the cup to his lips. His tongue was met by a sweet tasting liquid, obviously alcoholic. Whatever it was, it was enjoyable. He shook his head no, and Tyee looked disappointed. Gordan pointed to the first jar and made motions to ask what it was called. "Lum," said Tyee. Gordan nodded and gave the rest of the jar to Jonathen, who received it gladly. The next jar contained something bitter, yet rich and invigorating. Gordan again shook his head no. According to Tyee, this drink was known as kopi. The next jar was more promising. It was full of that thirst quenching and clear liquid known to Gordan as water. He nodded his approval, pronouncing water clearly while pointing to the jar. Tyee understood, and helped Gordan understand that they called it chuck.
At last, we're getting somewhere, thought Gordan.
These events happened three weeks later.
It was late at night, with the wind blowing about Tyee's tent as Gordan sat there. He shivered and pulled his cloak more tightly around him. The two had been conversing in the most basic of Chinook. Gordan found that his memorization skills were better than the thought, and he had quickly taken to the Chinook language. He now knew enough to have a basic conversation with Tyee--but it was enough. Gordan had sent back two of his men to Daniel to report on the findings, and they had returned with the leader's approval. This was what they wanted, to establish good relations with those around them. Gordan took a deep breath and cleared his throat. Tyee's attention was immediately upon him, and Gordan smiled as he began to relate their true intentions for their being here in his limited Chinook.
"Tyee, I have something very important to tell you. As you know, we are Americans. For untold and unknown years we have been wandering these vast lands. And now, we have decided to stop doing so and settle down and build a village like your tribe's."
Tyee nodded. "Yes, but there is more."
"A lot more. We have decided that our village isn't going to be ordinary--no offense. But we want our village to grow, and we want the American name to be recognized as one of the most powerful in the world. And we can do it. But we need your help."
Tyee looked confused. "What do you need our help for?"
Now comes the clincher, thought Gordan. "We have started building across the river, to the north. After it is completed, we will mark our territory. And your village will be inside the borders." There. It was out of his mouth before he could pause.
Tyee seemed unfazed. Then he sighed. "I will talk with the elders. Tomorrow, we shall inform you of our decision. For now, sleep."
This event happened the next morning.
Gordan awoke to Jonathen furiously shaking him. "Gordan, you must see this!"
He was instantly awake. Pulling his cloak over him, he muttered to Jonathen, "What's going on?"
"You had best see for yourself, sir."
A large group of Chinook men had gathered outside their tent. These men were wearing very little except for what appeared to be small skirts around their waists. They also carried axes that had ornamentally carved wooden handles and sharp stone blades. They looked very formidable, and Gordan found himself wishing that he had told his men to being along some sort of weapon. His thoughts raced as he considered the possibilities. Could it be that the Chinooks did not like the fact that they had neighbors, and were ready to go to war, with Gordan and his men being the first casualties? Or could it be that they were to be forced from their new home, and left to wander under the sky again until they would find a new place to settle? Tyee approached them, and Gordan watched him silently.
"These are yours," spoke Tyee in his limited American.
Gordan was confused. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"These men are yours to command! We have decided to join you and build the American tribe with you."
Gordan stammered, his surprise evident. "Th-thank you, Tyee. And thank you all, for joining us."
A Chinook man strode forward. "I am their leader. What are your orders, sir?"
Gordan thought for a moment. "We will go north. We will take you, your men, the elders, and you as well, Tyee, to Daniel, our leader. He will decide where you will best fit."
This event happened 15 minutes later.
Jonathen leaned toward Tyee as the formation marched north to where the American people were building their town. "Out of curiosity, where did you get the salmon?"
"From the big chuck," replied Tyee.
"The big water? Where is that?"
"A few day's journey to the southeast. We catch the salmon in nets as they attempt to travel up the river. It's been that way for time untold."
End of Chapter Three.
These events took place 23 hours later.
The ceremonial robe didn't quite fit. It had been made for a larger man, and Gordan wasn't quite sure it had been meant for him. It was deeply dyed with the stains of berries, and it had been dried in the sun. The colors had literally baked on to whatever material made up the robe.
That showed how unqualified he really was for this job. How could he make deals with nations and tribes when he couldn't even name the material that made his robe? He knew he had to work hard at this job, or everything could go up in smoke.
His thoughts turned to the tribe he was to meet later that day. They knew so little about them. The Americans did not even know their name, let alone their culture, their way of life--or whether they were hostile or not. Gordan could only hope that the lavishness they were presenting would sufficiently awe them. It would have to. This was the upper limits of the American luxury, and if this entourage didn't impress the native tribe, nothing would.
Daniel came into Gordan's tent, pushing the flap aside. A silence passed between them as Daniel examined Gordan for imperfections. Anything out of place might deter this meeting from a good standpoint into a possible failure.
Finally Daniel nodded his approval. "I think you're ready."
Gordan still felt tense, and Daniel noted this. "Well, perhaps on the outside, you are. But on the inside? That's what truly matters. If you let your nervousness show, the tribe's leaders will pick up on it, make no mistake. And from that, they will be less apt to consider anything that you may have to say. So, breathe. And remember to keep doing that."
Gordan smiled. "So, is there a specific strategy that you want me to follow?"
Daniel shook his head. "No. In fact, all I want you to do is introduce yourself, who we are, and our intentions of settling to their north. From there, see what their actions are. Let them make the first move.
"Alright," said Gordan.
"I have the utmost confidence in you, Gordan. You can make our tribe a great example, and it starts with meeting these locals. Now go. Jonathen and his men are waiting."
After a subtle push, Gordan found himself outside. The late summer's hot air made the robe even more uncomfortable. Stifling a yawn brought on by the early morning, Gordan made his way to where Jonathen's scout squad stood ready to venture into the unknown.
Daniel leaned over Gordan's shoulder and whispered. "I think you should say a few words before you leave."
Expectant faces turned to Gordan. He cleared his suddenly dry throat, trying to find words that would give these men confidence in abilities he wasn't too sure he had.
"Friends...this is a journey that may build us up or tear us down. Rest assured I will be doing my part to see that it is the former. I hope you will do your part as well. I...have the utmost confidence in you." Gordan could almost feel Daniel rolling his eyes behind him. But the small words worked, and the men applauded vigorously as Gordan passed between them to take the lead at the head of their formation. Jonathen shook hands with Daniel and then with Gordan, who then shook hands with Daniel.
Then they were off.
These events are estimated to be about a day later.
They had camped the previous night in a small grove of trees and had spent the better part of the morning slowly making their way towards the dwelling places of the tribe, taking great care to show that their presence was anything but hostile. Now they were in the center of the group of small cottages, and a growing crowd of curious onlookers began to form. Gordan saw one of his men let his hand draw close to his side, where it appeared that he had stowed a weapon of some kind. Gordan's eyes met Jonathen's. He had seen this as well and stepped to the side of the man, whispering something into his ears. The man's eyes widened, and his hand visibly moved away from his side.
Now the crowd was parting, creating a channel in which a man was coming through. Gordan straightened. This must be their leader, he thought.
The man coming toward them was tall, with short black hair and a well-worn face that didn't signify weakness as much as it did wisdom and strength. He had darker skin, but so did all the people. The one thing that marked him from all the others was the sheer amount of feathers adorning the band tied around his head. Some of the men accompanying him also had feathers, but none had as many. Gordan felt a nudge from Jonathen and stepped forward to assert his role as leader of the expedition.
Holding his hands out in front of him, palms facing the leader in order to signify peaceful intentions, he intoned: "We are Americans. I am Gordan."
The leader said something unintelligible in return. Gordan's hopes for an easy conversation began to waver but were renewed as quickly when the leader pointed to himself, saying, "Tyee."
Gordan pointed to the man. "Tyee?" He nodded. Gordan pointed to himself. "Gordan."
These events then took place 30 minutes later.
Gordan sat inside the chief's tent, which he had pointed to and said, "Tepee." The two of them were trying to teach each other words of their languages. A meal sat before them, consisting of greens and a type of fish Gordan had never seen. It had pink flesh, and Gordan made motions asking what it was called. "Salmon," replied Tyee.
"Tastes pretty nice," said Jonathen, and he gave Tyee a thumbs up. Tyee smiled in recognition of the sign and returned one himself. "So far, this has been going pretty well, eh Gordan?"
Gordan nodded. He turned to Tyee. "Water?"
Tyee's brow furrowed. It was clear that he wasn't sure what Gordan wanted. Gordan pantomimed drinking. The eyes widened, and Tyee stood up from where he was seated, and left the tent. Jonathen shrugged at Gordan. "Wonder what's up with him?"
Tyee soon returned with three large jars and an equal amount of cups. He proffered one to Gordan while taking the first jar and placing it in front of Gordan. He pointed to the cup, then pantomimed dipping the cup and drinking. Gordan nodded and smiled in acknowledgement. He took his cup and, retrieving the dark liquid inside, put the cup to his lips. His tongue was met by a sweet tasting liquid, obviously alcoholic. Whatever it was, it was enjoyable. He shook his head no, and Tyee looked disappointed. Gordan pointed to the first jar and made motions to ask what it was called. "Lum," said Tyee. Gordan nodded and gave the rest of the jar to Jonathen, who received it gladly. The next jar contained something bitter, yet rich and invigorating. Gordan again shook his head no. According to Tyee, this drink was known as kopi. The next jar was more promising. It was full of that thirst quenching and clear liquid known to Gordan as water. He nodded his approval, pronouncing water clearly while pointing to the jar. Tyee understood, and helped Gordan understand that they called it chuck.
At last, we're getting somewhere, thought Gordan.
These events happened three weeks later.
It was late at night, with the wind blowing about Tyee's tent as Gordan sat there. He shivered and pulled his cloak more tightly around him. The two had been conversing in the most basic of Chinook. Gordan found that his memorization skills were better than the thought, and he had quickly taken to the Chinook language. He now knew enough to have a basic conversation with Tyee--but it was enough. Gordan had sent back two of his men to Daniel to report on the findings, and they had returned with the leader's approval. This was what they wanted, to establish good relations with those around them. Gordan took a deep breath and cleared his throat. Tyee's attention was immediately upon him, and Gordan smiled as he began to relate their true intentions for their being here in his limited Chinook.
"Tyee, I have something very important to tell you. As you know, we are Americans. For untold and unknown years we have been wandering these vast lands. And now, we have decided to stop doing so and settle down and build a village like your tribe's."
Tyee nodded. "Yes, but there is more."
"A lot more. We have decided that our village isn't going to be ordinary--no offense. But we want our village to grow, and we want the American name to be recognized as one of the most powerful in the world. And we can do it. But we need your help."
Tyee looked confused. "What do you need our help for?"
Now comes the clincher, thought Gordan. "We have started building across the river, to the north. After it is completed, we will mark our territory. And your village will be inside the borders." There. It was out of his mouth before he could pause.
Tyee seemed unfazed. Then he sighed. "I will talk with the elders. Tomorrow, we shall inform you of our decision. For now, sleep."
This event happened the next morning.
Gordan awoke to Jonathen furiously shaking him. "Gordan, you must see this!"
He was instantly awake. Pulling his cloak over him, he muttered to Jonathen, "What's going on?"
"You had best see for yourself, sir."
A large group of Chinook men had gathered outside their tent. These men were wearing very little except for what appeared to be small skirts around their waists. They also carried axes that had ornamentally carved wooden handles and sharp stone blades. They looked very formidable, and Gordan found himself wishing that he had told his men to being along some sort of weapon. His thoughts raced as he considered the possibilities. Could it be that the Chinooks did not like the fact that they had neighbors, and were ready to go to war, with Gordan and his men being the first casualties? Or could it be that they were to be forced from their new home, and left to wander under the sky again until they would find a new place to settle? Tyee approached them, and Gordan watched him silently.
"These are yours," spoke Tyee in his limited American.
Gordan was confused. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"These men are yours to command! We have decided to join you and build the American tribe with you."
Gordan stammered, his surprise evident. "Th-thank you, Tyee. And thank you all, for joining us."
A Chinook man strode forward. "I am their leader. What are your orders, sir?"
Gordan thought for a moment. "We will go north. We will take you, your men, the elders, and you as well, Tyee, to Daniel, our leader. He will decide where you will best fit."
This event happened 15 minutes later.
Jonathen leaned toward Tyee as the formation marched north to where the American people were building their town. "Out of curiosity, where did you get the salmon?"
"From the big chuck," replied Tyee.
"The big water? Where is that?"
"A few day's journey to the southeast. We catch the salmon in nets as they attempt to travel up the river. It's been that way for time untold."
End of Chapter Three.
Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Merry Christmas to you all! As my gift to you, an update! For this one, I did try spacing out the paragraphs a bit more, as per your suggestion tR1cKy. Do let me know how it looks, and if it is better, I'll go back to the previous sections and edit those around as well!
Merry Christmas, and have a wonderful New Year! I'll be busy working on the next part of The Renewal!
Merry Christmas, and have a wonderful New Year! I'll be busy working on the next part of The Renewal!
Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
I think I'll just take this opportunity to say that you, sir, are an awesome writer. Good update.
Nice update Verarde, keep it up!
Thanks guys! I appreciate the compliments.
I'll likely be not writing as much in the upcoming month. I'm running a spelling bee, as well as studying for the SATs, and also part of an orchestra/choir, besides school, so free time is limited. What I do have will likely be spent playing games or writing though, so I hope to have another update out by the end of the month.
Tycho
AFK Forum Warrior
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2011
- Messages
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Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
Good evening. This is not dead. I recently got reinspired, wrote a thousand words today, and finished turn 0. Still on track. Expect an update within the week. With pictures.
Optical
The Fall of the Eleventh
(Yeah, that's all I can think of to say.
)
CELTICEMPIRE
Zulu Conqueror
SouthernKing
crickety cricket
Great job so far!
I'll subscribe, hoping that this isn't dead.
I'll subscribe, hoping that this isn't dead.
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