20 questions for heterosexuals

All right, all right, ya got me. I'm coming out of the closet: I've been a hetero ever since I was born. I was just hiding it because I was afraid nobody would accept me for who I was. :(
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

The instinct to reproduce.

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?

First time I had a crush on a girl

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?

No

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?


No

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?


I got enough bros.

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?


No

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?


Because I know what I prefer

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?


If most people are straight, then most people with a mental condition are straight

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?


My Bros, they were proud of me.

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?

Why do you feel compelled to think all straight people want to seduce others to straightness?

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?

I'd want them to be whatever they want, but I'd prefer straight of course.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?

Yes. Most of American's terrorers are Muslim, is it safe to expose children to Muslims?

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

When does this occur?

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?

I see no reason too, I'm happy.

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?




16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

heterosexuals

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?


HAs nothing to do with preference

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?

Too many solutions to list

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?


Who are the unhappy ones?

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?

No
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

Satan interfered with my DNA

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?

I didn't even realize the alternatives until it was too late.

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?

No

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?


No

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?


I don't know what that means.

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?


Just the opposite, actually.

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?

Lack of interest.

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?


A disproportionate number of everyone is heterosexual.

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?


They dealt.

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?

To increase the potential number of sex partners.

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?

Sure. More odds of grandkids that way.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?

Same risks either way.

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

Just an exhibitionist, I guess.

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?

Mental health is over rated.

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?


Chicks look better nakkid.

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

Everyone else does too.

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?


Because humans are involved.

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?

There are other ways to limit population.

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?


No. I'm used to my misery and would miss it if it were gone.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?

Nope. Biology.
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

The devil, the world, and my own sinful flesh.

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?

Late 80's, early 90's. How is none of your business.

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?

That sounds painful.

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?

I am NOT neurotic! I got beaten up all the time in grade school and have a very good reason to fear others of the same sex, thank you very much.

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?

That's not how that song goes! It's just "All you need is love".

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?

Not at all. I've been rejected by plenty of women.

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?

I've never slept with other men because they snore, keeping me awake all night. Also, other guys always insist on taking the top bunk. Annoying, to say the least.

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?

Maybe they're crazy for each other?

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?

I disclosed them to my wife. She responded in kind.

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?

Hey, I'm a person, not a people. Singular can't be plural.

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?

My kids are going to take math in school just like everybody else's kids. They can tough it out, just like their old man did.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?

Of course not. I send my kids to school clothed just like every other sensible person.

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

I didn't leave the windows open again, did I?

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?

My lack of prosthetic devices has convinced me that in fact I already am a whole person.

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?

I just can't stand my bodycount being hampered by the number of spells I can cast per day. I prefer to play as the sword-weilding butt-kicker.

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

Because that's where the action is.

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

Because there are many more doghouses than stables.

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?

Space colonies.

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?

Yes, but as a side effect I wouldn't be able to listen to Beethoven's 9th anymore, the doctors told me.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?

Didn't you read my answers to #1 and #4?

A very insightful and uplifting questionnaire, as these sorts of things alwas are. :lol:
 
Easy questions !

1) God / Jesus

2) When God gave me life.

3) Not as long as i avoid catching teh gay

4) It stems from my neurotic fear of God

5) All i need is the Bible

6) Out of fear of God

7) But i poop from there !

8) Because of basic math

9) They thanked God, nature and evolution

10) Because it is my duty to save your confused soul.

11) What problems ?

12) Yes, because i taught my children, the only thing to accept inside them is Jesus

13) Simply to troll homosexuals

14) Because i like my heterosexual object.

15) Because i like RPGs.

16) Because of sex

17) God forbids divorce - you must be getting your statistics from godless communist countries.

18) Cannibalism.
Or if that's gross, we could simply exterminate all the fat people on earth - that way we can reduce resource consumption by 46% worldwide.

19) No mention of that in the Bible.

20) No, God is what makes you heterosexual.
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
Fear of men.

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?
When I first saw tits.

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?
Possible but unlikely.

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?
Extremely possible.

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?
Is downtown available?

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?
Nah, men are just scary in general.

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?
Because men are scary.

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?
Crazy is more fun.

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?
It's a secret to everyone.

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?
Because they're sexy and I want to do them.

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?
Oh yeah, they deserve to be able to enjoy boobies.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?
As long as they're male teachers, there shouldn't be a problem, right?

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
But I keep it a secret?

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?
Does it count to get screwed in the arse by a woman using a strap on?

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?
For fun.

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
Sex is fun.

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
Not enough love, and by love, I mean sex.

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?
Eat people.

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?
Don't want to change, I like tits.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
Yep.
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
I was born that way

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?
I didn't

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?
No

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?
No

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?
I have thought about that, but I don't think so

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?
No

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?
I don't know that. It just doesn't seem an attractive option to do.

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?
Because a disproportionate amount of people are straight, or at least appear that way

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?
Everyone who asked for it, including you. They usually reacted as if nothing special happened, which I think is the most obvious response.

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?
I don't feel compelled to this at all.

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?
Yes.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?
The great majority of people are heterosexual (so heterosexuality isn't the cause), so yes.

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
I don't make spectacle out of it.

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?
Maybe I'll try one day, but I promise nothing.

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?
You base this on what?

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
Because we are humans.

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
Becaue heterosexuals have more choice and thus are more picky?

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?
By birth control. If that's unavailable, abstaining is the only option

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?
Never.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
Personal experience says no.
 
Why are people replying to this like it's a real thing
emotsmith.gif
 
Well, now that we've established that it's a waste of time for homosexuals and heterosexuals alike, all that's left are the joke answers.
 
2. At the age of 8.

The answers to the rest of the questions would all narrow down to doing the motorboat between a woman's breasts.
 
I'll bite

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

biology. It's the brain chemistry my brain was born with.

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?

Never decided, I've liked boobies and women since as long as I can remember.

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?

No

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex?

No

5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?

No

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?

No

7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?

Never done so (although I did have some experimentation as a kid).

8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?

No idea

9. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?

I keep it hidden

10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation?

I don't force anyone, they can do as they please.

11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?

Yes I'd want them to be heterosexual, but it's their choice ultimately. I cannot change who they are.

12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?

It's not safe, children should be taught by robots. :p

13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

I keep it to myself mostly, but I do make sexual jokes from time to time (only in company that appreciates such jokes).

14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential?

I explored enough as a kid, I know what I like.

15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to
narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such
unhealthy role-playing?

It's not that I cling to it, it's what I am.

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

I like to *deleted*

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

I blame societal changes. People have the tendency to look for the next best thing. And given that we all live in cities, it's easy to find someone better than your current spouse (for most people).

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?

Overpopulation will take care of itself via famines and disease. Nature's will (or of you are a believer, god's will), will take care of everything.

19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really want to.
Have you considered aversion therapy?

Don't need it, I'm happy when I'm *deleted*ing.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?

This might actually be true. I don't get along with men very well. But I don't hate or distrust them. I just don't have much in common with other men.
 
Er, no, that's right, you shouldn't. As a matter of fact, I'm dumbfounded as to why everyone in this thread are replying as if it were a serious questionaire:confused:. Think the point went sky high over some peoples' heads.

You forgot the (mostly because I'm bored right now) part which even though it's in parentheses is the most important part.
 
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
I was born one

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?
When I was young and saw a woman

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?
NO!

4. Is is possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of
the same sex
?
No

6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in Gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection?
No

16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
Cause were humans, duh

17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation?
Most in the first world nations are already limiting, by choice, to one to two kids on average.

20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
No, heterosexuals just prefer sexual and romantic encounters with the opposite sex.

Picture response to questions 5, 7-15, & 19:

notsureifserious.jpg


All sound baitish to me
 
CivGeneral, have you completely missed that the only serious thing about this thread is that those questions are considered fit for homosexuals but apparently not for heterosexuals?
 
CivGeneral, have you completely missed that the only serious thing about this thread is that those questions are considered fit for homosexuals but apparently not for heterosexuals?
No, I just consider the questions baitish and poking at my sexuality in an attacking manner.
 
Good. Then you understand perfectly why it's so offensive for them to be levelled at homosexuals.
 
Good. Then you understand perfectly why it's so offensive for them to be levelled at homosexuals.
Though I don't relay those questions to gays and lesbians, I just pretty much mind my own business. :confused:
 
And if everyone minded their own business, the world would be a much nicer place.
 
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