EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT! LIGHTHEARTER'S "STATE OF THE WORLD" EDITORIAL COLUMN!
Hot off the presses in Paris comes the world's most popular newspaper!
In this chaotic world of ours it is a global endeavor for society, strength and tranquility that most of all ensures we lack such things. Recently though, the fifteen sovereign Empires of note have begun major efforts toward securing a brighter future for their people by expanding and dethroning warlords and natives from their thrones in once great principalities across the globe. At the same time, the North Seas Empire has also civilized Ireland. What a rabid bunch of leprechauns offer this nation that claims the legacy of Albion I'll never know, but let us not dally.
The biggest news of the year comes from Russia. The Republic has swept up huge swathes of the old Russian Empire from Siberia to Finland, but that's hardly the news of the day, as they have invaded the Eastern European principalities under rule of the Jagiellon Commonwealth, commonly known for its unification a few years ago and the suppression of an Austrian baron known as Von Badguy, bent on raping and pillaging the great city of Danzig. We shall have to see if Poland-Lithuania's successor state can survive the Russian bear.
In my mind there is little doubt that Eastern Europe will soon be consigned to the hellish furnace of total war that it deserves, as Cossacks, Russians and Poles all fight to the death over a few measly acres of worthless farms. Such I suppose is the nature of Easterners. Speaking of Easterners, perhaps the Qing or the Makerons will take issue to Russian expansionism in the far East, and we shall see the delightful sight of foreign barbarians all killing each other in the name of heathen kings and disgusting Republican ideals. I rather look forward to watching Russia burn, as will all cultured gentlemen.
Of course, the only state that can compare to the barbarity of the East is that disgusting slave state in America, New Liberia. I wonder how long it will take for the Mexicans or the Columbians to bring it down? Or, that failing, when civilization will smite those barbaric souls into the ash heap of Hell where they belong. I rather hope the Italians and the North Seas men will set sail this very afternoon to pillage Norfolk. Europe needs to reassert its dominance before these lower classes and indigenous people get all uppity and start thinking they can equal Britain's old glories.
~ ~K. V. H. Lighthearter, Esq. ~ ~
INTRODUCING - WONDERS OF THE WORLD!
Pick one of the Wonders on the left and one of the bonuses on the right. One Wonder per territory. No two Wonders can have the same bonus - if more than one person tries to build the same Wonder on the same turn, it's RNG'd. Once all Wonder names are used, no more Wonders can be built - when a Wonder is destroyed, it's gone, and its bonus with it. You can rename your Wonders if you want, but you have to specify which of the actual names I remove from the list.
-L
