Nerds need not apply!

[Cheetah]

I'm sure many of you have heard of this, but I felt it was worth posting anyway.

From the department of "I just write on a tech-blog - he's a nerd and should be locked up!"...

http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2011/08/my-okcupid-affair-with-a-world-champion-magic-the-gathering-player

My OkCupid Affair With A World Champion Magic: The Gathering Player

This story sounds mean. It’s about a girl judging a boy because he’s a nerd (like so many of us!) that she met on OkCupid. But that’s the point: Judging people on shallow stuff is human nature, and the magic and absurdity of online dating is how immediately and directly it throws that into relief. One person’s Magic is another person’s fingernail biting, and no profile in the world is deep enough to account for that.

Australian Editor’s Note: We disagree with the US author of this post, more: Alyssa Bereznak Just Reminded Us That Women Can Be Predators Online Too

Earlier this month, I came home drunk and made an OKCupid profile. What the hell, I thought. I’m busy, I’m single, and everybody’s doing it. Sure, I’d heard horror stories, but what was the worst that could happen?

Two weeks into my online dating experiment, OKCupid had broken me down. It was like the online equivalent to hanging out alone in a dark, date-rapey bar. Every time I signed on, I was hit by a barrage of creepy messages. “Dem gurl u so foine, iwud lik veru much for me nd u to be marry n procreate.” Or “your legs do look strong.” So when I saw an IM from a guy saying, “You should go out with me ” I was relieved. He seemed normal. I gave him my name. “Google away,” I said. Then dinner was ready, and I signed off without remembering to do the same.

We met for a drink later that week. He was thin and tall, dressed in a hedge fund uniform with pale skin and pierced ears. We started talking about normal stuff — family, work, college. I told him my brother was a gamer. And then he casually mentioned that he played Magic: The Gathering when he was younger.

“Actually,” he paused. “I’m the world champion.”

I laughed. Oh that’s a funny joke! I thought. This guy is funny! But the earnest look on his face told me he wasn’t kidding.

I gulped my beer and thought about Magic, that strategic collectible card game involving wizards and spells and other detailed geekery. A long-forgotten fad, like pogs or something. But before I could dig deeper, we had to go. He had bought us tickets for a one-man show based on serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer’s life story. It was not a particularly romantic evening.

The next day I Googled my date and a wealth of information flowed into my browser. A Wikipedia page! Competition videos! Fanboy forums! This guy isn’t just some professional who dabbled in card games at a tender age. He’s widely revered in the game of Magic that he’s been immortalised in his own playing card.

Just like you’re obligated to mention you’re divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn’t someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles? But maybe it was a long time ago? We met for round two later that week.

At dinner I got straight down to it. Did he still play? “Yes.” Strike one. How often? “I’m preparing for a tournament this weekend.” Strike two. Who did he hang out with? “I’ve met all my best friends through Magic.” Strike three. I smiled and nodded and listened. Eventually I even felt a little bit bad that I didn’t know about the game. Here was a guy who had dedicated a good chunk of his life to mastering Magic, on a date with a girl who can barely play Solitaire. This is what happens, I thought, when you lie in your online profile. I was lured on a date thinking I’d met a normal finance guy, only to realise he was a champion dweeb in hedge funder’s clothing.

I later found out that he infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people I sort of know, including one of my co-workers. Mothers, warn your daughters! This could happen to you. You’ll think you’ve found a normal bearded guy with a job, only to end up sharing goat cheese with a world champion of nerds. Maybe I’m an OKCupid arsehole for calling it that way. Maybe I’m shallow for not being able to see past his world title. But if everyone stopped lying in their profiles, maybe there also wouldn’t be quite as many OKCupid horror stories to tell.

So what did I learn? Google the out of your next online date. Like, hardcore. Also, for all you world famous nerds out there: Don’t go after two Gawker Media employees and not expect to have a post written about you. We live for this kind of stuff.

Australian Editor’s Note: We disagree with the US author of this post, more: Alyssa Bereznak Just Reminded Us That Women Can Be Predators Online Too

So there you have it. If you're a nerd you're creepy and terrible. And it's your duty to warn about that on your dating profile!

There's so many levels of fail in this story. Alyssa Bereznak as her name is, is a relatively unknown writer for Gizmodo, obviously can't stand anything nerdy, and have the good common sense to try to publicly ridicule someone because he's good enough to be a world champion at something nerdy and having thousands of fans (and even his own Wikipedia page)...

There should be a prize for people like her.

Well, she did get her own, cheap, short-lived, Internet-meme:

Also, here's the Washington Post's take on it:

Spoiler :

Jon Finkel, Magic game master, and the travails of dating online

It’s tough out there in the dating world, especially in this confusing digital age. When you break up, do you defriend the ex on Facebook? Before a date, should you Google the prospective lover? Do you go for the free OkCupid profile or spend a little cash to upgrade to Match.com?

These were not questions our grandparents had to ask.

However, they all seem relatively stress-free compared to the one Jon Finkel had to ask himself Monday night: when a date goes bad, and she blogs all about it on a famous gossip site, how do you respond?

Two weeks ago, Finkel had a couple dates with a young lady he met on OKCupid. They had dinner, took in a show, the normal accoutrements of a New York date. They hit it off enough to set up a second meeting.

That young lady, Alyssa Bereznak, happens to write for tech gossip blog Gizmodo. Uncharmed by the second date, she took to the blog Monday to write up her “Brief OKCupid Affair With a World Champion Magic: The Gathering Player.”

It seems Finkel, when not escorting women about town, loves the stragetic card game Magic. Not only does he love it; he’s very, very good at it, winning the top prize at international contests nine times over the last decade.

While on the date with Bereznak, he mentioned this bit of personal history and she choked on her beer. She wrote: “Just like you're obligated to mention you're divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn't someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles?”

Many readers were unhappy with Bereznak’s portrayal of the gaming world. Even actress Felicia Day came to his defense, “I'm so appalled at this article if he actually didn't know she was gonna post it. What a violation.”

Gizmodo Australia disowned the article, writing its own post saying “women can be predators online too.”

Bereznak amended her post to say it was meant as a humorous cautionary tale about online dating, and then disappeared online.

As for Finkel, the card player could have played the blogpost off causally, ignored it even, but he embraced the story with aplomb, taking to Twitter and Reddit to respond to people’s interest in the tale.

Finkel may not have Bereznak’s heart, but he does have a whole slew of dating offers, international attention and thousands of anonymous online fans.

Love in the Internet age. Ain’t it grand?

-------------------------

If there wasn't enough discussion material in this OP:

Should nerds need to identify as such, especially when seeking a date, so that normal people can avoid them?

 

[Newbunkle]

Saw that a while back. She sounds like a right arse, but I'm more annoyed that someone made a horrible Magic card in MS Paint when Magic Set Editor is easier and looks more professional. Also, WotC sucks now and.they've made Magic really boring.

 

[PeteAtoms]

I thought geek was chic these days? Or has that been a fad that's come and gone

Should nerds need to identify as such, especially when seeking a date, so that normal people can avoid them?

Definitely not.

 

[Defiant47]

Very displeased with the contents of the story, but interested in seeing other people's reactions and comments on it.

 

[Zack]

She writes for a tech blog, and she's taking potshots at someone for being nerdy?

That would be like a Cracked writer criticizing someone on CollegeHumor for writing an immature article.

 

[Whiskey_Lord]

Jon Finkel is legendary. Women should be lining up outside his bedroom.

 

[LucyDuke]

Shallow twits need to identify as such, especially when seeking a date, so that normal people can avoid them.

I don't see how he lied - or why she's blaming him for her failure to do even a cursory googling.

 

[bombshoo]

Funny thing, I bet he didn't write about it on his profile, not because he was ashamed, but because he didn't want to brag or have people pestering him too much about it.

 

[Luckymoose]

This is disgusting. She wasn't looking for love she was looking for a rich guy with a normal job. If I met a girl who was a champion at Magic I would certainly not reject her. Making hundreds of thousands of dollars playing Magic takes commitment, intelligence and hard work. All things that can only help a relationship. This is sickening. Hope she marries an abusive banker.

@Bombshoo, I agree. He probably has a paparazzi attack when he goes to conventions.

 

[Arwon]

Quality trolling. *raises glass*

 

[SS-18 ICBM]

While I agree that she was incredibly shallow, I am very amused by the nerd rage emanating from the Internet's response.

 

[Quackers]

With her attitude she'll end up like the cat throwing woman in the Simpsons.

 

[emzie]

While I agree that she was incredibly shallow, I am very amused by the nerd rage emanating from the Internet's response.

Well, she made fun of a nerd... while writing for a tech blog.

I mean, what she said isn't that different from what I've seen guys say about online blind dates, "she didn't say she was fat in her profile!"

 

[mangxema]

She writes for a tech blog, and she's taking potshots at someone for being nerdy?

That would be like a Cracked writer criticizing someone on CollegeHumor for writing an immature article.

My thoughts as well.

 

[Miles Teg]

I'm not quite feeling the hate for her. She had a silly pet peeve about nerdy hobbies, and she didn't feel like she could get past that, so she broke it off after the second date. No harm, no foul. It's not like she's obligated to go out with the guy.

Of course, the bit about "lying" and infiltrating OKCupid is silly, but I imagine people have had similar reactions after discovering some deal-breaker that wasn't mentioned in the profile.

 

[bombshoo]

I'm not quite feeling the hate for her. She had a silly pet peeve about nerdy hobbies, and she didn't feel like she could get past that, so she broke it off after the second date. No harm, no foul. It's not like she's obligated to go out with the guy.

Of course, the bit about "lying" and infiltrating OKCupid is silly, but I imagine people have had similar reactions after discovering some deal-breaker that wasn't mentioned in the profile.

No one was demanding she click with the guy, the outrage was over the fact she tried to publicly humiliate him.

 

[Defiant47]

I'm not quite feeling the hate for her. She had a silly pet peeve about nerdy hobbies, and she didn't feel like she could get past that, so she broke it off after the second date. No harm, no foul. It's not like she's obligated to go out with the guy.

Her judgemental tone is the most alarming thing of all. The problem isn't that she broke it off with him because of his hobby. The problem is that she felt it necessary to write an article calling out his actions as unacceptable.

 

[Trajan12]

I'm not quite feeling the hate for her. She had a silly pet peeve about nerdy hobbies, and she didn't feel like she could get past that, so she broke it off after the second date. No harm, no foul. It's not like she's obligated to go out with the guy.

Of course, the bit about "lying" and infiltrating OKCupid is silly, but I imagine people have had similar reactions after discovering some deal-breaker that wasn't mentioned in the profile.

What strikes me as audacious is how she takes the attitude that people with different interests than her don't even belong in the dating world. As though there's some kind of mass conspiracy to hook unassuming Normal People™ up with card game players.

 

[Ajidica]

I can't tell whether this is proffessional real life trolling, or whether she is just a bimbo.

 

[Quackers]

I can't tell whether this is proffessional real life trolling, or whether she is just a bimbo.

The trolling is a bit weak, I think she could get in waaay more outrage with the amount of legitimacy she is using. Bimbos are meant to be hot too