Random Rants LIII: F My Life

[Borachio]

Ha!

The "almost" should qualify that as a rave, I think.

 

[shadowplay]

It's only Tuesday. Normally I don't run into road vomit until the weekend.

 

[H4run]

I somehow doubt that this is related to the chewing.

Maybe you are right, I thought like that because it is all start after eating, and each time I feel much better, it is again get worst after I eat something. Now it is much better even though it still in pain. And I already finish 3 from 5 of the paper I should finish.

I can be more relax now.

 

[Borachio]

How can stuff change there that fast?

I've worked for firms like that. It's typically ones that are trying hard to make major profits at the expense of their work force. Keep your employees guessing and on their toes, separate the wheat from the chaff... or something like that.

They can be a nightmare to work for.

They will often talk in lofty tones about a "flexible" work force. And "redeployment". And such guff.

 

[SamSniped]

Indeed. The best thing to do is probably to ask them out, even though you know the answer's no, if only for closure. Then you can slowly move on.

(See response to azzaman's post)

It is difficult, but as Phrossack said it's better to just get it over with so to speak rather than keeping it inside.

Of course, that said, tkae my advice with a grain of salt. A major incident of my life was when I fell in love with my best friend towards the end of high school; asked her out to prom, got rejected so quickly I barely realized it. We managed to sort things out after a couple months of awkwardness, but I only realized later how lucky I was that she was pretty chill about the whole thing and was pretty sympathetic, compared to a lot of other friendships that end up falling apart (the infamous "friendzone" crap, which I don't entirely understand). Of course, a lot of people are more chill than we realize, so who knows.

Yeah, it's good that this girl is more sympathetic and, in her own words, "not at all awkward about anything, because...

Unless they reject you at that time, but leave the door open for the future. That really causes issues.

...this is my exact situation. It's not that she just wants to be friends, it's that she wants to be friends for now, leaving me wanting her to be mine but not knowing when she'll want me, if ever.

Not to make this a competition or to imply you don't have a reason to feel crummy, but for someone in your position think of it this way:

Unrequited love is terrible, but what about if you had their love for a time and then lost it, but didn't lose them? You see them every day, you desire them every day, and you know that they once loved you like that too and now it's gone.

That's the worst result of this terrible situation, so it might be a good idea to see it from a more "optimistic" perspective? I don't know. I haven't figured it out myself.

I don't know, to be honest. I would rather love her and risk it all, but at the same time I don't want to ever lose her friendship or make things awkward between us, so it screws with my head.

 

[The_J]

Had that fear too.
But at some point I couldn't take it any longer, and confessed to my best friend.
She was surprisingly cool with it.
We still talk about very private things, still give each other hugs, etc., don't think *that* much has changed.
And now I at least know that I have to find someone else.
Knowing that, and together with all the other considerations, and all the other internal pressure, I have to say I felt relieved afterwards.

One thing to think for yourself: If you don't do anything, everything will stay as it is.
Do you want that? Or do you want that things change? It can't get better if you don't do anything about it.
-> your choice.

 

[azzaman333]

Need to stop poking myself in the eye.

 

[Phrossack]

Need to stop poking myself in the eye.

Wear goggles.

 

[schlaufuchs]

...this is my exact situation. It's not that she just wants to be friends, it's that she wants to be friends for now, leaving me wanting her to be mine but not knowing when she'll want me, if ever.

You gotta move on mang. She's just using you as a safe backup if things go wrong with whoever she may be pursuing. Either that or she's not interested in you romantically and wanted to let you down easy.

Either way you're getting the bad end of the stick, even if she does decide she's interested.

 

[Kozmos]

Wear goggles.

But they do nothing?

 

[Borachio]

Don't they stop you poking yourself in the eye?

I suppose it does depend where you wear them.

 

[Kozmos]

Don't they stop you poking yourself in the eye?

I suppose it does depend where you wear them.

Link to video.

 

[cybrxkhan]

Yeah, it's good that this girl is more sympathetic and, in her own words, "not at all awkward about anything, because...


...this is my exact situation. It's not that she just wants to be friends, it's that she wants to be friends for now, leaving me wanting her to be mine but not knowing when she'll want me, if ever.

If she hasn't made things clear, then, as Owen said, she might be using you as backup. My best friend, she made it very clear that she wasn't interested in me; at lest back then, she was a blunt, matter-of-fact person, so when she said "no" to me, she definitely 100% meant no. Some people aren't like that, I'm aware. Also I think she made it clear when we talked things out that if I would try to win her over she would beat the crap out of me (alright, we were joking with each other, but it was used to make her point clear, and I appreciate that - a lot of people are very vague with things).

I think my friend's blunt persona really helped. I knew she would tell the truth, so I didn't have doubts. Not all people are like that.

But hopefully you'll have it all sorted out eventually. It took me a few months to sort things out with my friend, but it was worth it.

Had that fear too.
But at some point I couldn't take it any longer, and confessed to my best friend.
She was surprisingly cool with it.
We still talk about very private things, still give each other hugs, etc., don't think *that* much has changed.

Yay, so my experience wasn't unique! After reading about all the horrible drama and terrible stories about people getting friendzoned or losing friends after love confessions or what other sort of soap opera drama you can think of, I was seriously wondering whether my experience was some sort of fantasy that would never happen in the real world. Thankfully, it's not. My friend and I were pretty reasonable about the whole situation (relatively speaking) and I'm really glad for that - in fact in a way it made our friendship stronger.

Though we don't really hug a lot. Which is fine, our friendship was kind of like that to begin with.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

RT said it better than I can Hobbs. He's right. You're a great guy from what I can tell. Hope everything goes as best it can.

@hobbsyoyo: Condolences, and please do not be upset with yourself. How you feel is how you feel, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve.

My own grandfather died in 1986, and at the time I didn't grieve because we had been having a lot of bitter, angry arguments in the previous several years. It took me 15 years after that to finally understand - a bit - where he was coming from, and forgive him. And since I don't forgive easily, that was a major thing.

Maybe you'll come to that point some day; maybe not. But only you know how you feel, and nobody has the right to say you're not feeling the "right" things.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

This is certainly true. And bereavement can be really unpredictable.

When my father died, to whom I felt quite close, I was very sad but pretty much unmoved at his funeral.

When my mother died, who had always seemed quite distant to me - in a friendly kind of way - it was all I could to do not to sob out loud (I thought I was going to burst). I was very, very surprised.

Anyway, Mr Hobbs, I'm sorry for your loss; no matter how it's affecting you.

Thanks everyone.

 

[gay_Aleks]

For the last week, it seems God turned on the thermostat in Bulgaria. It's bloody hot everywhere, and it's not even July yet!

 

[GamezRule]

This isn't really a rant but it's also not a rave. More just a comment on life.

My recent dealings with military recruiters has taught me that the only way I can trust somebody I don't know is if they don't stand to benefit from lying. Typically they do.

 

[Borachio]

Can I ask what your dealings have consisted of?

Have you been trying to get into the military yourself? Or are you already in the military, or associated with it in some way, and recruiting others?

 

[Goodfella]

I'm so sick of this!



Aaaaargggghh %&^*%!!!! @!#$@ %$^$!!!!!

 

[Borachio]

That is... so... blue!!

But what do you keep looking for?

 

[Goodfella]

I click that number (958 in the picture) to generate the 'who posted' window. I then have to wait 15 seconds before I can do anything. This happens once every so often but it builds up man, it builds up.