Random Rants XLIX - IT CHAFES MY ARSE!!!

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I'm genuinely questioning whether I've ever been sicker. My tonsils are massive and literally a deep scarlet.....I can feel the infection and pain in my ears!! My tongue has swollen to the size of Michael Jordan's shoe insert. My head pounds so consistently and hard it's like a metronome (doesn't matter where I move). Lastly, my joints are screaming and if the tiniest bit of cold air breaches my twin doona (possible) death bed, it feels like it's come from Antartica.

Now I know many good souls frequent this place so I've got a challenge to cheer me up. No one is allowed to post anything of a sympathetic nature at all, if you felt like wishing me the best instead fire off a mean spirited if not morbid reply. Im possibly feverish so please excuse if this is insane, I guess I figure it would be fun.
 
rLf, you better have put me in your effin' will you kangaroo jockey. Serves you right gettin' sick. You're Public figure. Hopefully you didn't infect any other car salespeople, or it looks like Sydney citizens will have to take the bus.

Sent via mobile.... How was that, rLf?
 
Just go walkabout and wait for the drop bears to finish you off, leaving your bloodies carcass for the crocs to dine on. You'll feel better about everything in the morning if you do.
 
Haha, I just knew you two would be first. In fact I'm wondering if I even needed to suggest that you hang s..t on me lol.

You're like an older, hairier Tom Sawyer/Huckleberry Fin duo!

Just got back from the doctor....temperature was 40.1 degrees. He gave me a doctors certificate to take the weekend off :goodjob:
 
This is a good time to practice separating from reality and focusing on whatever you are doing. Headphones can help a lot.
 
rugbyLEAGUEfan said:
I'm genuinely questioning whether I've ever been sicker. My tonsils are massive and literally a deep scarlet.....I can feel the infection and pain in my ears!! My tongue has swollen to the size of Michael Jordan's shoe insert. My head pounds so consistently and hard it's like a metronome (doesn't matter where I move). Lastly, my joints are screaming and if the tiniest bit of cold air breaches my twin doona (possible) death bed, it feels like it's come from Antartica.

Now I know many good souls frequent this place so I've got a challenge to cheer me up. No one is allowed to post anything of a sympathetic nature at all, if you felt like wishing me the best instead fire off a mean spirited if not morbid reply. Im possibly feverish so please excuse if this is insane, I guess I figure it would be fun.
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I told you to get that dead tooth pulled you frakking moron. Serves you right!
 
CivGeneral said:
That should be a rave :p.
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Agreed, it's a rave in the sense that the doctors certificate is such a cool thing. Freakin' Bill Gates couldn't harm me if I worked for Microsoft. Office whispers go like this "rLf has just had three days off sick. He just had two days off"..... "Hold on, he's got a doctors certificate"

VRWCAgent said:
Lost sales cuz he's not there to motivate his team is not a rave! :mad:
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Yes, I quite enjoy work sometimes. Having said that I'd trade the weekend off for having to defend myself from a headshot by my flat mate, who's convinced I'm a Zombie

Kozmos said:
This is a good time to practice separating from reality and focusing on whatever you are doing. Headphones can help a lot.
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Gonna try but they hurt my ears just from the pressure. Unfortunately, "Whatever I'm doing" just happens to be continually licking the swollen lump at the back of my throat.

To clarify, I am not a brave man.

hobbsyoyo said:
I told you to get that dead tooth pulled you frakking moron. Serves you right!
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Right on cue. I actually set my alarm to prove it. 9.41pm, Hobbs will "I told you so" me in the rants thread.
 
Cricket bats are better than gunshots for zombie invasions!

In all seriousness now that I've done my joke post per your orders, I do hope you get to feeling better soon!!
 
@rLf: you deserve it. Car salesmen in general deserve it.

@azzaman33: get a job at the car dealership of the man who doesn't know what real rugby is.
 
But, y'know, that dealership's in Sydney, and he's studying in Melb. Somehow I dont think he'd be able to do both.
 
You open a new facility and rLF adopts azza so as to make him his heir. Nepotism for everyone.
 
Joecoolyo said:
Yeah, this was me last year. Except my roommate was nice enough to just not bring people over a lot of the time.

This year its like that as well, but since I have my own room I can just close the door and not interact with all the strange people my roommates bring over.
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Nice. I'm living in a one-room triple, which I guess isn't an ideal situation, but things seem to have calmed down a bit. And at least I'm not in Glassell!
 
I lived in a two-room triple last year. I think I was the only one of the three people living in it that never brought people over.
 
You could've hosted a Seattle CFC meet, chox.
 
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