Roll II Rule
- Thread starter Thorvald of Lym
- Start date
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
To actually answer the question: 1/3 of the way though California as we speak.
I was hoping to keep it a surprise, but we may launch tomorrow.
I was hoping to keep it a surprise, but we may launch tomorrow.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
19: All those angry white men bashing Resistance Radio... maybe they weren't so delusional after all. You are the Man in the High Castle: it's hard to tell where EKNC remnants end and the new administration begins, but for all practical purposes the nightmare continues. The new USA is an unholy vortex of corporate cronyism, virulent racism, fascist thuggery and totalitarian paranoia, glued together by a plutocratic slush fund and barbarous military. The people in power rule unopposed, while the citizen-slaves live in a state of perpetual anxiety, never knowing when the privilege of their own lives will be revoked.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Manifest Destiny: One nation under God, and by "God" we mean Christos. And by "nation", we mean "every last scrap of this continent". +3 casus belli against any foreign state in North America, -3 diplomacy with North American countries.
Closed Borders:
Military–Industrial Complex: The government's been bought out and the generals now write the lawbooks. The army gets what it wants, and the plutocrats are more than willing to provide it. All military forces gain +2 in combat and regain +5% strength when idle; -3 to civilian economy.
Ideological Purity: Physical elimination of opposition forces safeguards the stability of the ruling dynasty. +1 stability, +3 ideological defence, -4 science.
Free-for-All Market: The complete deregulation of the national economy has turned domestic markets into a battleground where the rich get richer and the poor are trampled to death. +75% private income, -100% national revenue, double effect of market fluctuations.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Christos Antonopoulos (christos200)
President-for-Life
100% approval
$22 billion
+$200/turn
Milo Yiannopoulos
Secretary of State
+2 to persecution of minorities
-5 morale to nearby underage boys
Steve Bannon
Chief of Staff
+3 to propaganda
-3 to actual information
Rand Paul
Secretary of the Treasury
+2 to deregulation
-3 to economic reform
Anakin Skywalker
Chief of Secret Police
Rank: Colonel (max. command: Brigade)
+2 combat
+3 attack to attached units
8: For millennia China has been an abundant breeding ground for old men in mountains, and thus far, at least, you've failed to break out of the pack. You have a modest home base in the western hills and a smattering of disciple-fanatics at your command, but unless you want to go down in history as yet another fringe doomsday cult, you're gonna need to improve your marketing.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Ascetic Virtues: What could be any more humble than a cult devoted to minimalism? (Someone that didn't start a cult, obviously.) All units gain +1 defence; -1 economy.
Evangelical Imperative: Small and naïve minds charge that you're some sort of evil conspiracy. What fools! You're trying to save the world, not destroy it! +1 proselytism to all units; -2 diplomacy with rival theocratic states; 20% chance of converting defeated units.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
The Prophet (poketwo)
Cult Leader
100% approval
+2 to proselytism
+2 mental defence
12 (14): Though your realm is small, under your beneficence Canberra has been transformed into a thriving city dubbed the Sydney It's OK To Like. Morale is high,
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Everything's Coming Up Bonza: Setting aside the question of whether civic freedom can exist under an absolute dictatorship, everyday Aussies don't have much to complain about, even on a bad day. +2 happiness to all citizens.
United in Faith: Thanks in large part to NinjaCow64's leadership, a majority of the ACT has turned to Saberism as its primary religion, providing a sense of civic unity in the face of external aggression. +1 ideological defence, +1 military defence, -1 diplomacy with rival theocractic nations.
Succession Strategy: The Lord Protector intends to rule forever, of course, but barring that a contingency plan is in place to return to elected government. +2 stability during régme change.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
NinjaCow64
Prime Minister for Life
100% approval
+2 to escape artistry
Inventory
QBZ-95 (+2 attack - 30 rounds - 2x magazine - equipped)
Anointed Armour (+2 to basic defence, +1 v. radiation - equipped)
5 (13): Well..! With the threat of global domination put to bed, you huffed it back to the DRC to resume your election campaign. You cinched that vote as smoothly as a scimitar through hot butter—or your palm through President George's face. Ahh, good times... But then just as it was all getting wrapped up, the Global Order collapsed and in the confusion the border lands broke off into little warlord-fiefdoms. Bother! Still, most of the country survives under you—barely, since beyond home base it's been eviscerated by decades of civil war and whatnot so it's a bit of a fixer-upper. But hey, you nabbed the royal slush fund off of Mr. Christos, so you've got plenty of cash for renos!
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
National Science Agency: Your patronage has turned the city of Mbuji-Mayi into a nexus of global research, as your own augmentations clearly attest! Mbuji-Mayi gains National Science Agency: +15% interest on end-of-turn Science surplus; scientific research is now pooled nationally.
Determinator: When your boss is a cyborg supersoldier that doesn't afraid of anything, you can't help but feel a little extra confident in battle. Military units gain +2 defence.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
CivCube
President
79% approval
+250 max. hitpoints
$67 999 445 736
+$29/turn
+$29/turn in Mbuji-Mayi
Immune to radiation damage
+1 mental defence
Can boost combat rolls at will (req. bloodlust)
+1 defence in lieu of combat orders
+3 to combat
+8 hp/turn
+1 to all rolls
+1 to statecraft
+2 to basic defence
+2 defence to host country
+1 to defence
+2 to mobility
Can force enemies to target self for half damage when fighting in group
Inventory
Pickaxe (+1 to mêlée - integrated - disabled)
Slonky
QuadK-47 (+4 to ranged attack - 340 rounds - integrated - disabled)
AK-74 (+1 to ranged attack - 96 rounds - integrated - disabled)
RPK (+1 to ranged attack; +1 v. massed enemies - 192 rounds - integrated - disabled)
TriBeretta 92 (+3 to combat - 19 rounds - integrated - disabled)
Horace Radar
Boss QBZ-95 (+3 to attack - 8 rounds - equipped)
QBZ-95 (27 rounds - 1x magazine)
Boss QSZ-92 (+2 to attack - 8 rounds - equipped)
Launch codes for Rhino nuke silo
Boss Type 82 (+4 to attack - 8 rounds)
Boss Combat Knife (+3 to mêlée, always inflicts bleeding)
.50 Desert Eagle (6 incendiary rounds - 1x incendiary magazine)
Lucky charm (+1 to all rolls)
AK-47 (30 incendiary rounds)
FAMAS F1 (5 rounds - 2x incendiary magazine)
AK-47 x4 (cargo)
RPK (cargo - 75 incendiary rounds - 5x incendiary magazine)
FAMAS F1 x3 (cargo)
Hand grenade x2
Horse Talisman (+20 hp/turn and immunity to ongoing physical injury)
18:The Empire is in shambles—and that was before the war! As the old order sloughed away, Britain was forced to retrench, abandoning its remaining overseas territories to shore up the home. The people were desperate and open to anyone to turn the ship around. And so you came; and so you said: Screw the banks, shut up Nigel, it's time to make Britain Great Again! And that's exactly what you did, summoning the Spirit of Attlee to reinvigorate the Body Politic with Old New... Old..? Labour. With a popular King and a committed army, you're pretty much ready for anything.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Democracy Under Siege: As the world's only remaining avowed democratic state (with the possible exception of Schulz, but he's a Jerry secessionist and thus doesn't count), it's imperative that Westminster Palace be protected against all aggression. +3 ideological defence; military units gain +3 defence.
Trainyards for Everyone: While going back in time to eliminate Dr. Beeching was the preferred option, the GM has disallowed such tactics after shenanigans erased Earthling from the Round 1 record. That said, laying double track through every little county hamlet comes a close second. Railways across the main island, and +2 to domestic economy.
Social Safety Network: With Nigel and Boris's buffoonery having lost the last shards of the Old Empire, more funds are available to bolster the home front with an array of classical Labour initiatives. All cities gain +3 health; +2 civilian happiness, and +3 defence against economic shocks.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
e350tb
Prime Minister
87% approval
+2 to statecraft
George VII
King of Britain
+1 morale to all units
+2 morale to nearby allies in combat
+1 statecraft to incumbent Prime Minister
6 (11): Of all the states to enter the World War, yours was the only one to emerge empirically better off... and there it has stayed. Untouched by war on the home front and battle-hardened on the field, Namibia's domestic situation is mostly secure—the only real hurdles are the crippling debt from the "Star Wars" project and the remilitarized Trumpniks. But that's why you sent that expedition, isn't it?
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Women's International: In the face of the Redcaps, it's more important than ever that the Feminist cause coalesces across all cultures and boundaries. +2 diplomacy with Feminist states, +1 diplomacy with Socialist states.
People's Bank: After seizing the means of production, one must seize the means of transaction. 3% interest per turn on state treasury and personal savings.
Red-Blooded Revolutionary: No sense having a revolution if you're not gonna export it! Military units gain +2 attack; begin with Bluecape partisans in New York State.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Omega124
Generalissima
100% approval
$304 086.82
+$96/turn
+3 to statecraft
+2 to intimidation
+2 to social rolls
+2 v. Elites
Inventory
Elegant battle dress (+2 basic defence, +2 social rolls - equipped)
Falchion (+2 to mêlée - equipped)
Police baton x3
AK-47 x3 (30 rounds ea. - cargo)
Browning M2 (600 rounds)
Trickle-Down Ray (+2 to attack, damage also steals money)
Hand grenade x12
ABM interception drone (+4 v. strategic missiles - active)
20: One day as Martin was touring Britain to remind them that Brexit was a terrible idea and they're all gonna die, he learned that his home country had undergone a feminist revolution and he was no longer a contender for Chancellor—mainly because that office was completely abolished! Well, he couldn't go home now, and he couldn't go to France since the demons of the 20th century can't hold a candle to literal demons... nothing left to do but Make England European Again!
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Popular Momentum: The SPD train has no brakes. Begin in control of all English parliamentary constituencies that voted "Remain".
United Europe: Together we are strong. Together we will win.+3 trade with European states, and +50% trade revenue with European partners; when fighting alongside European allies, both armies gain +2 combat.
Fortress Europe: With America having surrendered to the demons of the 20th century, Europe must look to its own for defence policy. +1 military recruitment, +3 military import/export with European countries.
Digital Fundamental Rights: Digital technology is now a foundational element of modern society. We must ensure that foundation is not subverted against public interest. +2 civilian happiness, +3 spy defence, +3 censorship resistance, -5 state surveillance.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Martin Schulz (SouthernKing)
President of Europe
100% approval
+4 to statecraft
+3 diplomacy with European states
+1% support for SPD per turn in host country
+20% support for SPD on the first visit to a foreign country
+3 casus belli against fascists
+3 casus belli against racists
*roll*
You are the lakes.
11: Investing all your money, your family's money, and all the money you could scrounge off your friends, you've somehow managed to buy territorial rights to all the lakes in the world. Also you're a sea dragon now.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Private Reserve: In lieu of an actual navy, you have a fleet of lawyers at the ready to enforce your de jure ownership. +5 casus belli against any country that uses your lakes without permission.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Double A
Lord of the Lakes
+100 max. hitpoints
+2 combat
-10 mobility outside of water
Can instantly teleport between lakes
1: Old empires. New empires. Foreign empires. Competing empires. Puppet empires. Empires by people that don't understand that the Mandate of Heaven isn't really a thing. It seems that whenever IOT and empires come together, China gets the short of it ('cept u Joecoolyo
). Well, China's got pretty damn sick of empires, especially those led by psychic Japanese schoolgirls (I mean seriously, remember what happened with the USV? Never. Again.). You've landed in Qingdao only to find the continent split between multiple opposing not!empires, and in all the nationalist jingoism you've barely managed to sway some impressionable youths to your side. But hey: no-one need tell you that showbiz ain't easy!NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Small State, Big Government: You've only got one city on your side (if even that), so you'd better make the most of it! Qingdao gains +1 civilian happiness, +2 domestic economy, +2 morale.
Signal Noise: Contrary to Freud's hypothesis, Will to Pleasure is the 'neutral' gear in lieu of an actual life purpose. Your powers of suggestion are of little use while China is distracted by fractious civil war! Neighbour NPCs gain +5 defence v. foreign influence.
Pretender to the Throne: Of all the would-be successors, you are undoubtedly the least legitimate contender. -3 casus belli against neighbour NPCs, while they gain +2 casus belli against you!
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Kougyoku Ren (Nuka-sama)
Empress
88% approval
+3 charisma
+1 morale to nearby units
10% chance to subdue, rather than kill defeated enemies.
Akio Tsuneo
Your oldest and most devoted fan (according to him), Akio is ready and willing to lay down his life on your behalf. That would probably sound more encouraging if he could actually, you know, fight.
-2 to combat
Huan Rong
You won him over with your star power; he deigned your attention by guiding you through the ins and outs of the city. Huan is so smitten that he gushes about you to anyone and everyone within earshot, though he can be clingy.
+1 national influence
-2 to all actions when away from Ren
Shunyuan Lei
His military credentials looked impressive; it's only after you hired him you learned he survived the war by running away from pretty much every fight.
Rank: Major (max. command: Company)
+1 combat to attached units
-3 morale
11: When the Saviour returned to His Kingdom on Earth, He found Albania corrupted by the Judas Alia. Religion, democracy, international participation! After shedding a single Marxist–Leninist tear, the Messiah set forth for the one region unsullied by revisionism. From His secret prefabricated bunker in
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Bunkers to Go: When you're surrounded by revisionists, you can never be too cautious. +3 to bunker construction; all bunkers convey +2 defence to garrisoned forces.
Anti-Revisionism: No wonder Communism failed, what with all these heretical appeasers. Fortunately you still know the True Path. +3 ideological defence; +1 casus belli v. foreign claims on Albania.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Enver Hoxha (Civ'ed)
First Secretary
100% approval
+3 mental defence
+3 v. revisionists
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
11: All those Euroskeptics that claimed the EU was a conspiracy to instate the Fourth Reich... they were right! ...Mostly right, anyway. Because instead of fascist it was socialist, and it's less about the DAX conquering Europe as it is its women overtaking the men. The new empire is a bizarre blend of the Holy Roman mandate, democratic socialism and workers' collectives bound together by Namibian-style gender militarism—the whole thing seems so contradictory it's likely the Kaiserin's will alone that keeps the machine running.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Triple Capitals: A government this big can't be confined to a single city! Delegation of power reduces legislative vulnerability in crisis situations, but impedes bureaucratic efficiency. +2 stability, -1 Action.
Byzantine Bureaucracy: There are so many layers of government, it's a wonder anything even gets done in this state! Still, at least final policy has been verified in triplicate. +1 statecraft to the Kaiserin; -3 to government reform.
Value Rolodex: Imperial? Democratic? Revolutionary? Take your pick! The pundits have mastered the art of rationalizing why it's the right fit. +1 non-cumulative diplomacy with Monarchic, Democratic, Socialist, and Feminist states.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Terra McKay I (Terran Empress)
Kaiserin
+1 to statecraft
+2 to social rolls
+2 morale to nearby units
16: A lot of slurs were thrown about during the World War, but no-one could have expected that the Eternal Kingdom would give way to literal monsters! France has succumbed to otherworldly forces seemingly overnight; whether their intentions prove good or ill remains to be seen, but the inhuman alliance is surprisingly well-organized and not to be taken lightly.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Dark Artistry: Coming from a world of magicians lends a unique tactical angle against these technocratic foes, though suspicion over your practices will be a stumbling block to winning their trust. +2 to black magic; -3 to diplomacy with non-Dark Arts practitioners.
Feudal Government: Bureaucrats. Bureaucrats. Bureaucrats! This ship would capsize if it wasn't a pyramid scheme. Still, the complex delegation of power allows local governments to take fairly large initiative, if at the cost of state-level control. +1 municipal economic development, -50% state revenue; +1 statecraft to regional governors.
Multiracial Empire: Achieving consensus amongst disparate human cultures is hard enough; you're roping together rival species! Though a shaky alliance at the best of times, it does provide a breaker against enemy sedition. -2 stability, +2 spy defence, +4 defence v. foreign influence.
Peasant Army: Each local lord retains a reserve force of men-at-arms to call upon in times of war. When the country first enters a war, a portion of all city population is automatically conscripted (these units will demobilize in peace but retain experience in future levies).
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Esther Solomon (Ailedhoo)
Empress
93% approval
+2 to magic
+2 national stability
-2 defence
Ysbal XI
Queen of Shee
+2 to magic
+2 to deception
-5 v. iron/steel
Leon II
King of Crete
+50 max. hitpoints
+3 to mêlée
13: I'd make a "Somali libertarian paradise" joke, but that's basically the country incarnate. A shaky definition of the "general will" permits virtually everything short of murder—and that last one is still being argued, both literally and figuratively, to death. Personal freedom is guaranteed to excess, resulting in a strong society but fairly weak state and largely pacifist attitude. You call it a utopia; everyone else calls it hedonism, and is taking bets to see how long the experiment lasts.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Schrödinger's Market: We put the economy in a box. In the event of a global shock, it may be Socialist or it may be Capitalist, but until the crisis is observed it exists in a simultaneous super-position. 50% chance each economic action or event will resolve to either Capitalist or Socialist effect.
No Borders: Citizens, immigrants, wild wanderers, they're all the same to you and can come and go as they please. It's not like customs officials could stop them if they wanted to—that would be unfree! +5 refugee desirability, +3 foreign trade, -5 spy defence.
Make Love, Not War: If there's anything "free love" genejacks like to do, it's exercise their equipment. Though the result is ungodly fecundity, there's not a lot of interest in leaving a bed to go die in a battle. Military units gain +10% strength when idle, suffer -3 morale; -2 to military recruitment.
Lazy-Faire: At this point, the government basically exists for the sole reason to qualify the region as a sovereign state, with all practical power usurped by corporate initiatives. The country's been doing surprisingly well running on autopilot, but good luck to anyone that wants to change the status quo. +2 municipal economy, -95% state revenue, -3 to regulation.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Tani I (SonicTH)
Emperor
+50 max. hitpoints
+3 mental defence
-2 mobility
Enemies killed in close combat restore hitpoints
19: No Gods, No Kings, Only Meme. A simple message—so simple in fact that it was probably cribbed from somewhere else and then given i-r-o-n-i-c twist. But All Art is Imitation so either way you're vindicated in the end. Great, lost my train of thought—but not as fast as the Old Order was chucked into the ash-heap of history (though in our case it's more the eternal tire fire of power politics, at once illuminating and yet choking the world with factional strife. Did you know Hobbes based his understanding of politics on mathematical laws? And did you know he got his maths wrong? True story. You know who else bases human dynamics on bad maths? Economists. And look where that got us!) But yeah, forget Tibet, forget the shadow puppets in Plato's fungeon, forget the Lost City of Eden that was apparently in Venezuela because Columbus only got that patronage by being dumber than real astronomers—the font of Enlightenment is really in California! No, seriously, maybe Governor "I'll Nevah Be Baaaack!" and 24/7 strip clubs were all the ice cream koans we needed to jolt ourselves awake from the stupor of material suffering. Long story short, them cowpokes shouldn't have been going west in the first place—the West lives in you.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Anarcho-Meritocracy: Putting the best people in the best roles to do the best job produces the best results. Who knew?! +3 statecraft, +3 stability, +3 civilian happiness.
Non-Lethal Methods: West Coast society has transcended such backward concepts as armed oppression and total warfare. All military units double as police: +2 to law enforcement, 25% chance to convert, rather than kill defeated enemies; civilian casualties reduced in all circumstances.
Solum Facta: It is the base and inconstant faith that seeks followers through words rather than deeds. The truth of Memery is not in question; therefore, show them the path, and they shall follow. +3 to national influence, +3 ideological defence.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Meme Man (Tolni)
President
∞% approval
+200 max. hitpoints
+3 to basic defence
+3 to mental defence
+3 morale to nearby units
+2 non-aggressive diplomacy
50% chance to convert defeated enemies
20 (20): All you wanted to do was squirrel yourself away in the farthest reaches of the Galaxy where no-one could harm you. Was that too much to ask? 1) Yes it was, and 2) That was a rhetorical question. Well, after finally defeating/escaping/getting ignored by that Monarchist division, you decided that if running away from your problems wouldn't work, you'd take the fight to them. Bullying the remnant drifters into assembling your own private starship, you set course for literally the last country the GM would expect to carve out your own little empire. NuZee's pretty small, but it's out-of-the-way and turned into a veritable citadel. Bring it on, world!
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Reluctant Hero: You've never liked getting entangled in other people's affairs; hell, given the choice you'd rather avoid "affairs" altogether. Military units gain +1 defence; -2 diplomacy, -2 starting or joining a war.
Totalitarianism: Ein Volk! Ein Reich! Ein Führer! There wasn't much of a state left by the time you got here, so setting up a crony government was easy. Of course, being surrounded by yes-men can make you complacent. +2 to statecraft, +5 defence v. foreign influence, -3 to political reform.
Thought Police: Control the present, command the future, conquer the past. Rigorous control of information ensures an obedient (if cynical) citizenry, at the cost of maverick innovation. -2 civilian happiness, +4 stability, +3 spy defence, -3 science.
Military State: There is no mistaking who runs this show, and on whose behalf it's being run. +3 military recruitment, -3 civilian economy; military units gain +2 combat and double as police: +3 to law enforcement, civilian casualties increased.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
CivGeneral
Autarch
100% approval
+3 to combat
+2 to intimidation
Inventory
Anointed Shield (+2 to basic defence - equipped)
Heavenly Sword (+3 to mêlée - equipped)
17: "When beholding the tranquil beauty and brilliancy of the ocean's skin, one forgets the tiger heart that pants beneath it; and would not willingly remember that this velvet paw but conceals a remorseless fang." Melville might've flubbed a couple words but he got the gist of it. Whereas the rest of the world squabbles over land, you know the true prize is the sea: long-distance shipping remains the artery of global commerce, and whoever best rides the waves sets the heartbeat.
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
Maritime Focus: Cats that like water! What next, feminist empires? Fascist America? Magic?? Needless to say, one doesn't forge an island empire without a lot of boats.+2 ship construction; +2 reliability to all watercraft, +2 combat to warships.
Merchant Marine: When you live leagues away from everyone else, it's vital that your supply lines remain strong. +100% foreign maritime trade revenue; cargo ships gain +1 defence and +2 mobility; garnish 10% cargo value of foreign trade ships passing through your territory.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
KaiserElectric
Leader
100% approval
+1 to mêlée
+2 charisma
+3 to interactions with foreign cats
Georg Alexander von Müwer
Rank: Admiral (max. command: 2 Fleets)
+2 combat to attached units
+2 mobility to attached units
18: The Islamists wanted to set back the clock. Sadly for them, with the implosion of America, Islamic Jihal'QaISIS lost most of its raison d'être and tore itself apart over which individual kingpin had the "true" interpretation of God's Truth. The result was both hands snapped off so now no-one knows what time it is. In the mess that followed, Istanbul declared independence as a neo-Sultanate, reasoning that "Eh, still better than
NATIONAL OUTLOOK
All for One: One city, one ruler. What more could you want? Rigid hierarchy gives everyone a sense of togetherness, though top-down management tends to squander individual initiative. +3 stability, +3 ideological defence, +3 defence to units in Istanbul; -4 stability during régime change.
Close to Home: With state and municipal policy so closely intertwined, it's easy to figure out the best course of action for everyone involved... as long as they stay in the city. +2 happiness, +2 economy, +3 statecraft in Istanbul; -2 statecraft everywhere else.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
Mehmet I (Mathalamus)
Sultan
96% approval
Nationality: Ottoman
+2 charisma
+3 morale to nearby units
R.I.P. dial-up users
Base borders map
News on the March
God Save the King
In a spectacular upset not seen since the Tories won a majority in 2015, numerous English counties have defected to Martin Schulz and the SPD. London is a city divided, with King George remaining at Buckingham while loyalist forces dig in on the east end. So far neither side has escalated the issue, but until the dispute reaches a formal settlement, both factions lose 2 stability and 1 economy in the city.
The Warring States
The Eternal Kingdom's implosion and the resulting power vacuum has led several competing factions to lay claims on the Chinese mainland, including an uppity pop star from Japan who so far has gone largely unnoticed by the rival cliques. No shooting has started yet, but given the border build-ups it is likely inevitable that someone will overturn the status quo:
People's Republic of China—Survivors of the Monarchist invasion, the PRC was the recognized prewar mainland government and seeks total control of China. It has retaken the southeast and formed a solid front against the Beijing clique, but the depleted army is now vulnerable to Taiwanese intervention.
Republic of China—Untouched by the world war, the RoC has found itself in a position to legitimately challenge the Chi-Coms for the first time in half a century... if it can secure naval superiority in the region.
Shen Yun Performing Arts—The Falun Gong-sponsored theatre company has diverted resources back to the mainland, securing Beijing and several central cities. The army is mostly historical re-enactors, but metal swords do a heck of a better job than plastic facsimiles.
Candidate Manchuria—With the Politburo's retrenchment, democracy advocates rallied into a breakaway republic across the northern frontier. The army is large but uses mostly scavenged equipment, and is surrounded by equally mobilized rivals.
Greater Joseon—Decimated by the Eternal Kingdom and having lost its nuclear arsenal to the invaders, North Korea was powerless to stop the South from settling the border dispute once and for all. With its own army unscathed and China in disarray, Sŏul seized the opportunity to take revenge for a history of servitude and pushed into the mainland. With the single largest army on the continent, the question becomes how far Korea is willing to test its luck.
Platinum Horde—Having held off the Monarchists for longer than anyone reasonably expected, Mongolia feels it's earned the right to some military prestige. Stripped bare in the occupation, there weren't a lot of arms to go around; but with a vast and ungoverned western frontier, there is ample opportunity for expansion.
Soviet Far East—Following the war's end, surviving forces rallied at regional headquarters in Yakutsk to secure the border. Expansive territory is offset by a moderate standing army that is mostly focused on securing the frontier before the Chinese conflict spills over.
"Not My Congo!"
It's pretty much a universal law that just as the DRC seems poised to finally get somewhere, something happens to screw it all up. In the chaos and confusion of the world war, frontier regions defied the national election and broke off from the central government. It remains to be seen how President CivCube will respond to these rebels:
West Congo—Headquartered in Kinshasa, as it controls the capital it considers itself the legitimate government. Controls the second-best army after Congo proper.
South Congo—Headquartered in Kolwezi, as it controls an air force it considers itself the legitimate government. Its standing army, however, is woefully inadequate.
East Congo—Headquartered in Bukavu, as it controls amphibious APCs it considers itself the legitimate government. It does not, however, have air cover of any sort.
Azande Rebels—As the state with an Azande consensus, it considers itself the legitimate government. Impressive claim for a faction with no major cities.
Divided States of America
From one tyranny to another: no sooner was the Eternal Kingdom defeated than the Trumpniks resumed the charade of government. Unluckily for the cabal in Washington, they returned too early for the New Yorkers to demobilize and too late to stop Calexit. Flanked by hostile forces and having stretched the home guard thin to secure the mainland, it looks like the USA is poised for a third Civil War.
Notes from the GM
And so after almost a month since it started, the update is finally complete. As long as nobody pulls a one-turn annex, future turns should proceed much quicker.
Player statistics and the current turn's maps are indexed on the front page, and will be updated each turn. Just in case Terra asks, all players have a minimum of one Action regardless of modifiers, unless explicitly stated otherwise.If you've been on IOT Chat, there is a 200% chance Ailedhoo has been spamming you about a public feast. To clarify: Whether or not attendance counts as an Action on your end depends entirely whether you choose to conduct it as an Action: you may respond simply as roleplay, or you may opt to use the opportunity of multiple world leaders congregated together for more substantial purposes.
Some notes on units
As previous stated, in order to avoid tedium, in lieu of direct orders units will respond to their environment as they deem appropriate. Likewise, you can give a group of units the same order and it will be counted as a single Action.
Units can be renamed and reorganized for free. Units come in two basic forms: Aggregate and Composite. An Aggregate Unit is most of what you'll see in the stats: it's a single entity with aggregated modifiers, typically representing a particular 'class'. A Composite Unit lists its individual components: most of the fleets are this; it can comprise heterogeneous sub-units and allows for their easy reassignment. Depending on the context these may use aggregated stats or list each component's modifiers individually. As a rule of thumb, the larger the unit, the higher its aggregate strength, but the less flexible it is in adapting to specific contexts.
Next update will start in a week's time or when all orders are in, whichever comes first. I'll be playing this by ear for the first few turns; once I've figured out the general pattern I'll aim to cut down the intervals as much as possible.
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The Cult welcomes those fellow players in this great game. The Prophet may use this invention called "IOT Chat" in the future. Anyways, we hope you shall all recognize the need for a minimalist utopia which has torn off the oppressive rules which restrict us. Join us, and we shall destroy Death itself!
christos200
Never tell me the odds
USA! USA! USA!
US #1
(Excellent update Thor! Well done!)
US #1
(Excellent update Thor! Well done!)
Mathalamus
Emperor of Mathalia
Sultan mehmet I is happy with the City State of Istanbul. a wealthy first world nation, a nicely formed well trained and equipped army, the administration running better than most machines, and a large number of fine people that he can be proud of.
in short, he is happy with life. happy with his job, and happy that everything is going well. His primary job, is, of course, being the leader, a well loved sultan. fair, nice, and just. he has a number of hobbies, many of which is military tactics, or knowledge of seafaring craft.
therefore, his single action is to:
1. Help the refugees settle nicely in Istanbul, making sure they all have decent lifestyles, a nice safe home, and put them on the road to becoming full citizens of the State.
(it is unknown how many actions i am permitted to make)
in short, he is happy with life. happy with his job, and happy that everything is going well. His primary job, is, of course, being the leader, a well loved sultan. fair, nice, and just. he has a number of hobbies, many of which is military tactics, or knowledge of seafaring craft.
therefore, his single action is to:
1. Help the refugees settle nicely in Istanbul, making sure they all have decent lifestyles, a nice safe home, and put them on the road to becoming full citizens of the State.
(it is unknown how many actions i am permitted to make)
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,847
The Lodge, Canberra
"Mmm, that was a nice update!" said I, NinjaCow64, after reading the update in my not-very-humble abode. "Well, I guess I should get my diplomacy sorted for starters. Let's see...firstly I'll probably have to refuse the feast-"
I made a sound that is similar to Jim Sterling's laugh in sheer delight.
"JEEVES!" I shouted at my butler, Jeeves.
"Sir," said Jeeves in a very British accent "I have told you multiple times that my name isn't Jeeves, it's B-"
"Jeeves," I responded "How much do I pay you again?"
"Quite a lot, sir." said Jeeves.
"So, considering the amount I pay you, what's your name again Jeeves?" I said once again. Jeeves gave a brief pause.
"Jeeves, sir." He responded, smartly.
"Very good then." I continued. "So, Jeeves, do you know if those Masterchef nerds survived the Abbott purges?"
"They did sir," Jeeves answered "They're currently in Dickson surveying the restaurants."
"Excellent!" I responded. "Ring them, tell them that their Prime Minister has a job opening for them."
To: Empress Esther Solomon of the Empire of Majterre
CC: Káto Tragoudistís, Diplomat to Australia
While I am honoured to be invited to your feast, unfortunately I have lots of business to attend to here in Canberra so I will be unable to attend. In my stead I will send the newly appointed co-Ambassadors to the Empire of Majterre; Gary Mehigan, George Calombaris and Matt Preston. We are sure that they will enjoy the feast and also show that Canberra wishes nothing but good relations with the rest of the world.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
P.S: Thor, this doesn't count as an action! You don't even need to give statistics to the three Masterchefs, just treat them like Aliedhoo's diplomats.
"Well, that's the most important piece of diplomacy done." I said after doing a nice, long stretch. "Hopefully there won't be any other major diplomatic actions I need to take today."
"I'm sorry to disappoint you sir," Jeeves said while disappointing me "But there is a diplomatic crisis. It appears that another IOTer has gained the rights to all the lakes in Canberra."
"What?" I responded.
"OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" I oh noed.
To: DoubleA, Lord of the Lakes
Canberra has a long cultural connection to our lakes. Ask any Canberran - Lake Buley Griffin and all the other lakes are very important. It is very important for us Canberrans to have territorial control of all of Canberra, including her lakes. Therefore we propose a trade, name a reasonable sum of money and we'll buy back the rights to our lakes. Please consider this offer, our lakes are really important.
May Saber bless you,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
"Well," I said "Now that I've done that diplomacy I may as well finish the rest of my diplomacy."
To: Autarch CivGeneral of the Kiwi Empire
Australia has had a long tradition of friendship with New Zealand. While everything changed when the China nation attacked, we hope they haven't changed that much. I hope for continued good relations with your nation. I would like to ask one little thing, I would heavily prefer it if you would stay off of Australia. I do intend to reunite it, eventually, and I feel like that would put a massive damper on our friendship. There are plenty of islands in the pacific to Imperialise, I'm sure there's no need to do it in Australia. Hopefully this won't be too much of an issue and we can continue our good relations like an eternal scuttlebug jamboree.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
To: President Meme Man of Nuevo Oso República de California
Your nation has some of the absolute heckest boys I have ever known. I hope we are cool.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
"Mmm, that was a nice update!" said I, NinjaCow64, after reading the update in my not-very-humble abode. "Well, I guess I should get my diplomacy sorted for starters. Let's see...firstly I'll probably have to refuse the feast-"
If you've been on IOT Chat, there is a 200% chance Ailedhoo has been spamming you about a public feast. To clarify: Whether or not attendance counts as an Action on your end depends entirely whether you choose to conduct it as an Action: you may respond simply as roleplay, or you may opt to use the opportunity of multiple world leaders congregated together for more substantial purposes.
I made a sound that is similar to Jim Sterling's laugh in sheer delight.
"JEEVES!" I shouted at my butler, Jeeves.
"Sir," said Jeeves in a very British accent "I have told you multiple times that my name isn't Jeeves, it's B-"
"Jeeves," I responded "How much do I pay you again?"
"Quite a lot, sir." said Jeeves.
"So, considering the amount I pay you, what's your name again Jeeves?" I said once again. Jeeves gave a brief pause.
"Jeeves, sir." He responded, smartly.
"Very good then." I continued. "So, Jeeves, do you know if those Masterchef nerds survived the Abbott purges?"
"They did sir," Jeeves answered "They're currently in Dickson surveying the restaurants."
"Excellent!" I responded. "Ring them, tell them that their Prime Minister has a job opening for them."
****************
To: Empress Esther Solomon of the Empire of Majterre
CC: Káto Tragoudistís, Diplomat to Australia
While I am honoured to be invited to your feast, unfortunately I have lots of business to attend to here in Canberra so I will be unable to attend. In my stead I will send the newly appointed co-Ambassadors to the Empire of Majterre; Gary Mehigan, George Calombaris and Matt Preston. We are sure that they will enjoy the feast and also show that Canberra wishes nothing but good relations with the rest of the world.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
P.S: Thor, this doesn't count as an action! You don't even need to give statistics to the three Masterchefs, just treat them like Aliedhoo's diplomats.
****************
"Well, that's the most important piece of diplomacy done." I said after doing a nice, long stretch. "Hopefully there won't be any other major diplomatic actions I need to take today."
"I'm sorry to disappoint you sir," Jeeves said while disappointing me "But there is a diplomatic crisis. It appears that another IOTer has gained the rights to all the lakes in Canberra."
"What?" I responded.
"OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" I oh noed.
****************
To: DoubleA, Lord of the Lakes
Canberra has a long cultural connection to our lakes. Ask any Canberran - Lake Buley Griffin and all the other lakes are very important. It is very important for us Canberrans to have territorial control of all of Canberra, including her lakes. Therefore we propose a trade, name a reasonable sum of money and we'll buy back the rights to our lakes. Please consider this offer, our lakes are really important.
May Saber bless you,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
****************
"Well," I said "Now that I've done that diplomacy I may as well finish the rest of my diplomacy."
****************
To: Autarch CivGeneral of the Kiwi Empire
Australia has had a long tradition of friendship with New Zealand. While everything changed when the China nation attacked, we hope they haven't changed that much. I hope for continued good relations with your nation. I would like to ask one little thing, I would heavily prefer it if you would stay off of Australia. I do intend to reunite it, eventually, and I feel like that would put a massive damper on our friendship. There are plenty of islands in the pacific to Imperialise, I'm sure there's no need to do it in Australia. Hopefully this won't be too much of an issue and we can continue our good relations like an eternal scuttlebug jamboree.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
****************
To: President Meme Man of Nuevo Oso República de California
Your nation has some of the absolute heckest boys I have ever known. I hope we are cool.
May Saber bless you all,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
Ailedhoo
wonderer
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2012
- Messages
- 7,798
Note: this post does not contain orders! The purpose is to lay the ground for future diplomatic relations.
---
To His Highness, Tani of the first of his name of the Faxumite Empire
Bonjour from the great Majterre Empire!
Her Imperial Excellence, Empress Esther Solomon, would like to invite a member of your royal household of a heroic champion of your realm to make visit to the majestic city of Paris for purpose of opening diplomatic relations between our realms and to plan for future deals we will eventually make a roll for. We promise feasts and other entertainments for your prestigious representative.
Heagal von Hisenberg, the famed goblin scientist, prince and the only lay member of the Warlock Council, has volunteered to serve as a personal tour guide for the one you send to Majterre. He will give you access to our governing chambers and allow you the chance to take in the wonders of Paris, as well as ensure your representative are well catered for to their tastes and pleasures. Heagal von Hisenberg has promised to make the timetable for the visit and has made communications to ensure excellent entertainment is provided.
So: who do you wish to send from your household, champions or of both dominions to Majterre?
Praise the rising sun of our relations!
Yours faithfully
High Voice Chidnor Iomalí, High Chancellor of Majterre, writing by instruction of Her Imperial Majesty.
P.S: the Australians are planning to send their own diplomatic party. We will ask them if they want to come at the same time as your arrival. Perhaps you fancy a three-way diplomatic consultation?
---
To Princess-Elector Terra - McKay I of the Rhineland
Salutations from the Empire de Majterre to Das Volksreich der Frau!
I seek friendly relations between our realms. It may time before we set a treaty but I would to like to lay the groundwork for when we do make the roll. As such I just wish to make my pleasures from having you as a neighbour be revealed. When the time comes I wish to ensure our empires are well linked as friends, process prosperity through a communion of imperial majesty.
There will of course be need of plans, including the links of our merchants. Eventually we are going to need to make a road between Nancy and Bern; such a waste of connectivity if there is no road of friendship between them. A road would bond us well and make joy for the burghers which will henceforth allow us more coinage in our vaults.
Anyhow: consider this the first of many letters. In time I hope to invite you for a feast or if you prefer a simple tea & cake would do nicely.
May the Fates smile on both our realms!
Yours faithfully
Empress Esther Solomon of Majterre
---
To NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory
We will take no offence to you not coming to our realm at this time and will gladly take Gary Mehigan, George Calombaris and Matt Preston. We are so happens are inviting one among the household of Tani to our realm; perhaps the Australian co-Ambassadors to the Empire of Majterre may like the chance to have a three way diplomatic meeting? We should ask the
Faxumite Empire about this. We will at any rate play the good host.
May the Fates smile on us all!
Yours faithfully
Empress Esther Solomon of Majterre
---
To: all
From: Majterre
As you know we send our diplomats to your realms; we will prepare to accept your diplomats in kind.
We would invite you all to a banquet but we are at the moment needing to make arrangements, so it may take time.
Praise the new friends to be!
---
To His Highness, Tani of the first of his name of the Faxumite Empire
Bonjour from the great Majterre Empire!
Her Imperial Excellence, Empress Esther Solomon, would like to invite a member of your royal household of a heroic champion of your realm to make visit to the majestic city of Paris for purpose of opening diplomatic relations between our realms and to plan for future deals we will eventually make a roll for. We promise feasts and other entertainments for your prestigious representative.
Heagal von Hisenberg, the famed goblin scientist, prince and the only lay member of the Warlock Council, has volunteered to serve as a personal tour guide for the one you send to Majterre. He will give you access to our governing chambers and allow you the chance to take in the wonders of Paris, as well as ensure your representative are well catered for to their tastes and pleasures. Heagal von Hisenberg has promised to make the timetable for the visit and has made communications to ensure excellent entertainment is provided.
So: who do you wish to send from your household, champions or of both dominions to Majterre?
Praise the rising sun of our relations!
Yours faithfully
High Voice Chidnor Iomalí, High Chancellor of Majterre, writing by instruction of Her Imperial Majesty.
P.S: the Australians are planning to send their own diplomatic party. We will ask them if they want to come at the same time as your arrival. Perhaps you fancy a three-way diplomatic consultation?
---
To Princess-Elector Terra - McKay I of the Rhineland
Salutations from the Empire de Majterre to Das Volksreich der Frau!
I seek friendly relations between our realms. It may time before we set a treaty but I would to like to lay the groundwork for when we do make the roll. As such I just wish to make my pleasures from having you as a neighbour be revealed. When the time comes I wish to ensure our empires are well linked as friends, process prosperity through a communion of imperial majesty.
There will of course be need of plans, including the links of our merchants. Eventually we are going to need to make a road between Nancy and Bern; such a waste of connectivity if there is no road of friendship between them. A road would bond us well and make joy for the burghers which will henceforth allow us more coinage in our vaults.
Anyhow: consider this the first of many letters. In time I hope to invite you for a feast or if you prefer a simple tea & cake would do nicely.
May the Fates smile on both our realms!
Yours faithfully
Empress Esther Solomon of Majterre
---
To NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory
We will take no offence to you not coming to our realm at this time and will gladly take Gary Mehigan, George Calombaris and Matt Preston. We are so happens are inviting one among the household of Tani to our realm; perhaps the Australian co-Ambassadors to the Empire of Majterre may like the chance to have a three way diplomatic meeting? We should ask the
Faxumite Empire about this. We will at any rate play the good host.
May the Fates smile on us all!
Yours faithfully
Empress Esther Solomon of Majterre
---
To: all
From: Majterre
As you know we send our diplomats to your realms; we will prepare to accept your diplomats in kind.
We would invite you all to a banquet but we are at the moment needing to make arrangements, so it may take time.
Praise the new friends to be!
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Tani Coyote
Son of Huehuecoyotl
- Joined
- May 28, 2007
- Messages
- 15,191
Actions:
Hire support staff. The Emperor values brains as much as looks!
Roleplay:
Executive Branch of the Empire
Ministry of Realization – Oversees and allocates funding for research projects, while also having jurisdictions over education funding and curriculum. Historically has a rivalry with the Development Ministry.
Ministry of War – Self-explanatory. Controls the armed forces in the fight against fursecution. Needless to say, the jokes are endless about the War Department’s name.
Ministry of Development – Issues regulations, where deemed necessary, on all commerce and personal behavior that affects the community. Also oversees tax collection and distribution of government funds. Due to extensive social responsibility on the part of worker cooperatives, in practice its primary job is distribution of the basic income. That said, it also helps with infrastructure projects when the market has not picked up the slack.
Ministry of State – Handles foreign relations and relations with subnational bodies, both government and NGO. As a result, it often has the most grassroots approach to legislation and foreign policy, allowing the Emperor to make wise decisions.
Ministry of Justice – Enforces national laws and court decisions and runs the sparsely-populated national prisons (which are mostly inhabited by sociopaths). Supreme authority over all police, although in practice there is devolution.
While the Emperor has all executive, legislative, and judicial authority, there is still a court system that enjoys nominal independence, with the Emperor only occasionally intervening to overturn its decisions (particularly if they are seen as pushing the country towards capitalism). There is no separate legislative body, but lobbying groups and organizations are welcome to petition the Emperor, or in practice, the State Ministry.
Realization Ministry
Minister: Selim Liquir Powell*
Bio: Dr. Powell is a brilliant polymath, and is widely credited with having made the Empire what it is. He spearheaded the development of the body modification technology, even being one of its first subjects; this has earned him respect for being willing to do anything to further the cause of discovery. Dr. Powell mutated himself into a fox, though the early process was imperfect and gave him three tails instead of one. Conspiracy theorists said he did this on purpose as part of some attempt to imitate the kitsune of Japan, or otherwise develop secret powers.
War Ministry
Minister: Raquil “Rocket” Alrrakun*
Bio: A promoted general with a heck of a trigger finger. While he is known for having a hotblooded disposition, this does not undermine his humanitarian values or his ability to quickly come up with decisive tactics and strategies. All that said, he loves experimental weaponry, and Dr. Powell’s ministry is routinely bombarded with requests for updates on new weapons. It is suggested the Emperor appointed him to the post so he would stay out of the battlefield and make more use of that Procyon brain of his.
Development Ministry
Minister: Biggs Sanders*
Bio: Born Bridget Sanders, Biggs was assigned female at birth. Moving to the Empire, he used incredible charisma and management ability to establish a sizable business empire, having such a large, efficient operation he amassed a considerable amount of wealth despite the equitable distribution of wages to his fellow worker-owners. He became famous for being the first person to change his sex and species at the same time. Many assume his short stature is a tactic to make people underestimate him. And it works.
State Ministry
Minister: Sylvester Conner Cooper*
Bio: Born to multicultural French immigrants, Cooper had many run ins with the law and the underworld in his youth, both in his native France as well as in the Empire. Having come before the Great Reform which abolished almost all social programs in favor of a single, unconditional income, he ended up on the wrong side of the tracks, turning to thievery for a living. The Reform was followed by a Great Pardon, which he was a beneficiary of, as he had acted nobly in his criminal acts and clearly was only doing so to provide for himself. Since his pardon, he became both a great businessman and a negotiator, easily winning company elections in every entity he joined. Cooper’s smooth talking and efficient management made him an ideal candidate for State Minister. It is unknown if Cooper was modified, or was already that way in France; he always talks his way out of answering.
Ambassadors:
TBA
Justice Ministry
Minister: Nicholas Piberius Wilde*
Bio: Wilde was originally a young man living in poverty on the fringes of the Empire; facing discrimination, he became a prominent figure the gray market, always skirting illegal activities. His criminal behavior in the end helped expose corruption in the government’s social services, which prompted the Emperor to abolish them in favor of a single basic income program. For his role, his body modification (being a process that is free for most citizens, but having a wait list due to the expense) was expedited, and he took the form of a fox.
Wilde’s experience with the underworld near the Empire’s frontier has made him invaluable in tracking and shutting down criminal rings, due to the tendency of murderers, smugglers and extortionists to call the same organization home.
(*All resemblances to people real or fictional are purely coincidental!)
Breaking News: Daring Escape from Imperial Prison
News has broken that infamous war criminal Sombra de Mar has managed to escape confinement, being smuggled out during a routine transit of goods into his facility.
Sombra de Mar, birth name Jose de Solis, rose to prominence as a virulent racial supremacist, proclaiming that the human race was inherently impure and could only be saved through bodily augmentation. At first, many compared him to vampire supremacists of fiction in forgetting his own human origins, but the jokes soon ceased. De Mar gradually built a following and he and his supporters, the Sombristas, advocated for harsh eugenic policies to make the Faxumite Empire a purely non-human state. As he and his backers turned to violence, they were banished by Imperial decree.
That was not the end of the movement, however. De Mar proceeded to undermine the authority of the Somali government (what else is new), before turning his fanatics on the Empire that had banished him. Fortunately, this was a strategic blunder on de Mar’s part, as the Empire soon routed him and struck at the heart of his operations in southern Somalia, though it only stayed long enough to ensure the movement did not return; the Empire was not interested in an occupation and annexation. De Mar and his inner circle were almost all captured or killed in combat, and this allowed his movement to wither and splinter.
However, the large yet brilliant de Mar has remained a hero to fur supremacists everywhere, the government too interested in avoiding capital punishment to dispose of him permanently. Measures were taken to try and prevent a resurgence of Sombrism, and it has since become illegal to request muscular enhancement on the level of de Mar’s, but there has always been a possibility of his threat returning.
And it appears that threat has returned. Search parties are scouring the country trying to locate him, as analysts predict he might try to reform his movement in Somalia. Others, however, think he has learned from his mistake, and will go elsewhere.
“Sombra’s a pretty clever guy, to say the least. Faxum might very well be under his fascist ideals if not for a single strategic miscalculation to try and strike at the Empire from Somalia. If I had to guess, he’d probably befriend fellow fascists. I hear those types are right at home in the USA right now, for example.” An anonymous source within the State Ministry said.
When asked why humans would accept a fur supremacist, the source responded, “Realistically, Sombra is never going to achieve his plan of human genocide. He is, however, charismatic, brilliant, and has enormous physical strength on top of it. He might plan to kill the humans he allies with last, but so long as he never gets to the point he actually can do so, he’s a net gain for anyone with nefarious intentions. He’s an alt-fur, and would be in good company with an alt-right regime like the USA’s. All this assuming that’s where he goes, of course.”
Imperial News Network shall keep you updated as information comes about de Mar and his followers.
Sombra de Mar has the appearance of a black male wolf, with red eyes, cut red hair, and an imposing, tall and muscular appearance. The Emperor has announced a reward for any details leading to his recapture.
Diplomacy
To: Majterre
State Minister Sylvester Cooper shall attend the feast in Majterre, wishing to see Paris and France for the first time since childhood.
To: Australian Capital Territory
Sylvester Namurr has been named ambassador to Australia and Tasmania. After previous discussions with the Australian Capital Territory government, he will be making a visit before heading to Tasmania. He will be accompanied by a small group of scientists and security detail, seeking to collect flora and fauna samples. Tasmania is hailed as a holy site by many in the Faxumite Empire, so the visit to the area has enormous cultural significance. The Empire requests the ACT's public signing off of this joint diplomatic and scientific expedition.
To: World Lakes
Offerings are made to the Lake Monster in the hopes it shall peacefully coexist with the Empire.
Hire support staff. The Emperor values brains as much as looks!
Roleplay:
Executive Branch of the Empire
Ministry of Realization – Oversees and allocates funding for research projects, while also having jurisdictions over education funding and curriculum. Historically has a rivalry with the Development Ministry.
Ministry of War – Self-explanatory. Controls the armed forces in the fight against fursecution. Needless to say, the jokes are endless about the War Department’s name.
Ministry of Development – Issues regulations, where deemed necessary, on all commerce and personal behavior that affects the community. Also oversees tax collection and distribution of government funds. Due to extensive social responsibility on the part of worker cooperatives, in practice its primary job is distribution of the basic income. That said, it also helps with infrastructure projects when the market has not picked up the slack.
Ministry of State – Handles foreign relations and relations with subnational bodies, both government and NGO. As a result, it often has the most grassroots approach to legislation and foreign policy, allowing the Emperor to make wise decisions.
Ministry of Justice – Enforces national laws and court decisions and runs the sparsely-populated national prisons (which are mostly inhabited by sociopaths). Supreme authority over all police, although in practice there is devolution.
While the Emperor has all executive, legislative, and judicial authority, there is still a court system that enjoys nominal independence, with the Emperor only occasionally intervening to overturn its decisions (particularly if they are seen as pushing the country towards capitalism). There is no separate legislative body, but lobbying groups and organizations are welcome to petition the Emperor, or in practice, the State Ministry.
Realization Ministry
Minister: Selim Liquir Powell*
Bio: Dr. Powell is a brilliant polymath, and is widely credited with having made the Empire what it is. He spearheaded the development of the body modification technology, even being one of its first subjects; this has earned him respect for being willing to do anything to further the cause of discovery. Dr. Powell mutated himself into a fox, though the early process was imperfect and gave him three tails instead of one. Conspiracy theorists said he did this on purpose as part of some attempt to imitate the kitsune of Japan, or otherwise develop secret powers.
War Ministry
Minister: Raquil “Rocket” Alrrakun*
Bio: A promoted general with a heck of a trigger finger. While he is known for having a hotblooded disposition, this does not undermine his humanitarian values or his ability to quickly come up with decisive tactics and strategies. All that said, he loves experimental weaponry, and Dr. Powell’s ministry is routinely bombarded with requests for updates on new weapons. It is suggested the Emperor appointed him to the post so he would stay out of the battlefield and make more use of that Procyon brain of his.
Development Ministry
Minister: Biggs Sanders*
Bio: Born Bridget Sanders, Biggs was assigned female at birth. Moving to the Empire, he used incredible charisma and management ability to establish a sizable business empire, having such a large, efficient operation he amassed a considerable amount of wealth despite the equitable distribution of wages to his fellow worker-owners. He became famous for being the first person to change his sex and species at the same time. Many assume his short stature is a tactic to make people underestimate him. And it works.
State Ministry
Minister: Sylvester Conner Cooper*
Bio: Born to multicultural French immigrants, Cooper had many run ins with the law and the underworld in his youth, both in his native France as well as in the Empire. Having come before the Great Reform which abolished almost all social programs in favor of a single, unconditional income, he ended up on the wrong side of the tracks, turning to thievery for a living. The Reform was followed by a Great Pardon, which he was a beneficiary of, as he had acted nobly in his criminal acts and clearly was only doing so to provide for himself. Since his pardon, he became both a great businessman and a negotiator, easily winning company elections in every entity he joined. Cooper’s smooth talking and efficient management made him an ideal candidate for State Minister. It is unknown if Cooper was modified, or was already that way in France; he always talks his way out of answering.
Ambassadors:
TBA
Justice Ministry
Minister: Nicholas Piberius Wilde*
Bio: Wilde was originally a young man living in poverty on the fringes of the Empire; facing discrimination, he became a prominent figure the gray market, always skirting illegal activities. His criminal behavior in the end helped expose corruption in the government’s social services, which prompted the Emperor to abolish them in favor of a single basic income program. For his role, his body modification (being a process that is free for most citizens, but having a wait list due to the expense) was expedited, and he took the form of a fox.
Wilde’s experience with the underworld near the Empire’s frontier has made him invaluable in tracking and shutting down criminal rings, due to the tendency of murderers, smugglers and extortionists to call the same organization home.
(*All resemblances to people real or fictional are purely coincidental!)
Breaking News: Daring Escape from Imperial Prison
News has broken that infamous war criminal Sombra de Mar has managed to escape confinement, being smuggled out during a routine transit of goods into his facility.
Sombra de Mar, birth name Jose de Solis, rose to prominence as a virulent racial supremacist, proclaiming that the human race was inherently impure and could only be saved through bodily augmentation. At first, many compared him to vampire supremacists of fiction in forgetting his own human origins, but the jokes soon ceased. De Mar gradually built a following and he and his supporters, the Sombristas, advocated for harsh eugenic policies to make the Faxumite Empire a purely non-human state. As he and his backers turned to violence, they were banished by Imperial decree.
That was not the end of the movement, however. De Mar proceeded to undermine the authority of the Somali government (what else is new), before turning his fanatics on the Empire that had banished him. Fortunately, this was a strategic blunder on de Mar’s part, as the Empire soon routed him and struck at the heart of his operations in southern Somalia, though it only stayed long enough to ensure the movement did not return; the Empire was not interested in an occupation and annexation. De Mar and his inner circle were almost all captured or killed in combat, and this allowed his movement to wither and splinter.
However, the large yet brilliant de Mar has remained a hero to fur supremacists everywhere, the government too interested in avoiding capital punishment to dispose of him permanently. Measures were taken to try and prevent a resurgence of Sombrism, and it has since become illegal to request muscular enhancement on the level of de Mar’s, but there has always been a possibility of his threat returning.
And it appears that threat has returned. Search parties are scouring the country trying to locate him, as analysts predict he might try to reform his movement in Somalia. Others, however, think he has learned from his mistake, and will go elsewhere.
“Sombra’s a pretty clever guy, to say the least. Faxum might very well be under his fascist ideals if not for a single strategic miscalculation to try and strike at the Empire from Somalia. If I had to guess, he’d probably befriend fellow fascists. I hear those types are right at home in the USA right now, for example.” An anonymous source within the State Ministry said.
When asked why humans would accept a fur supremacist, the source responded, “Realistically, Sombra is never going to achieve his plan of human genocide. He is, however, charismatic, brilliant, and has enormous physical strength on top of it. He might plan to kill the humans he allies with last, but so long as he never gets to the point he actually can do so, he’s a net gain for anyone with nefarious intentions. He’s an alt-fur, and would be in good company with an alt-right regime like the USA’s. All this assuming that’s where he goes, of course.”
Imperial News Network shall keep you updated as information comes about de Mar and his followers.
Sombra de Mar has the appearance of a black male wolf, with red eyes, cut red hair, and an imposing, tall and muscular appearance. The Emperor has announced a reward for any details leading to his recapture.
Diplomacy
To: Majterre
State Minister Sylvester Cooper shall attend the feast in Majterre, wishing to see Paris and France for the first time since childhood.
To: Australian Capital Territory
Sylvester Namurr has been named ambassador to Australia and Tasmania. After previous discussions with the Australian Capital Territory government, he will be making a visit before heading to Tasmania. He will be accompanied by a small group of scientists and security detail, seeking to collect flora and fauna samples. Tasmania is hailed as a holy site by many in the Faxumite Empire, so the visit to the area has enormous cultural significance. The Empire requests the ACT's public signing off of this joint diplomatic and scientific expedition.
To: World Lakes
Offerings are made to the Lake Monster in the hopes it shall peacefully coexist with the Empire.
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Ailedhoo
wonderer
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2012
- Messages
- 7,798
Not Orders
Dear Sylvester Cooper
We have in communications with Emperor Tani taken pleasure to know you will be our guest.
Heagel von Hisenberg will greet you as you arrive and will serve as your own personal escort.
We will be honoured to have you as a guest and are glad you can enjoy your return to France.
What methodology will you travel? We need to know where Heagel will greet you. You will likely be arriving in the later afternoon so that will be focused in getting you to the rooms we prepared for you and a nice evening meal.
Anyway we attached a letter of timetable for your visit...
The day after you may make a quick catch up meeting on matter with the Imperial Chancellor Ariel Main. Heagal will escort you as you leave.
We hope you will enjoy your stay!
Yours faithfully
High Voice Chidnor Iomalí
Dear Sylvester Cooper
We have in communications with Emperor Tani taken pleasure to know you will be our guest.
Heagel von Hisenberg will greet you as you arrive and will serve as your own personal escort.
We will be honoured to have you as a guest and are glad you can enjoy your return to France.
What methodology will you travel? We need to know where Heagel will greet you. You will likely be arriving in the later afternoon so that will be focused in getting you to the rooms we prepared for you and a nice evening meal.
Anyway we attached a letter of timetable for your visit...
Spoiler plans of the day :
The day after you may make a quick catch up meeting on matter with the Imperial Chancellor Ariel Main. Heagal will escort you as you leave.
We hope you will enjoy your stay!
Yours faithfully
High Voice Chidnor Iomalí
e350tb
Stupendously Illogical Englishman
No. 10 Downing Street
The Present Day
The Prime Minister threw open the door of his bedroom. He adjusted his tie and tucked his hands behind his back before beginning his walk down to the Cabinet Room. As he did so, a collection of nameless staffers approached him, folders in hands.
"Draft for the Industrial Development Act, Prime Minister."
"Ah yes, got to get those Smoking Chimneys of Prosperity going up," nodded the Prime Minister, "Well, maybe not smoking chimneys, the environmentalist wing of the party probably wouldn't like that too much..."
"Majterre's sent a diplomatic envoy, sir."
"Welcome them, tell them they can set up at the old French embassy at their earliest convenience, send them some cognac or whatever it is they drink..."
"Prime Minister, York has agreed to rebuild Flying Scotsman to 1920s specifications, although they say it might not be the most efficient set-up for tourist workings..."
"Well, they can lump it, can't they?"
"Morning Times, sir."
"Ah yes, it's nine o'clock."
"Uh...no sir, I mean-"
"Well ladies and gentlemen," said the Prime Minister as he reached the door to the Cabinet Room, "Thank you for your time, but I'm afraid I must get to work. If you have any more papers, leave them with my secretary - lord knows Bernard needs something to justify his existence. That'll be all."
The Prime Minister walked merrily into the Cabinet Room and sat down, grinning widely as he regarded the rest of the cabinet.
"So, what's first on the agenda?" he asked before sipping his water.
"The imminent civil war, Prime Minister."
The Prime Minister swallowed his drink.
"Ah. Damn," he said, "And when did this situation come about?"
"It was in the update, Prime Minister," the Home Secretary, the Right Honourable Arthur Wilson.
"I suppose I shouldn't have skimmed that, should I?" the Prime Minister sighed, "Alright, what's the strategic situation?"
The Minister for Defence stood up, pointing to a map on a board behind her.
"As you can see," said Pearl, tapping the map with a stick, "We still control most of Great Britain. The SPD have major strongholds in the south of England and have taken Liverpool. They also control most of Cornwall."
"Not the tin mines!" the Prime Minister exclaimed.
"What is the military situation?" asked Wilson.
"We outnumber them about 3 to 1 in ground and air forces," replied Pearl, "In London specifically, we have twice their forces, and their air support is negligible."
"We can't exactly bomb our own city, though, can we?" interrupted the Prime Minister.
"Hopefully it won't come to that," shrugged Pearl, "But if it does...eh, we can rebuild what we bomb."
"Do we have any peaceful options?" the Prime Minister asked.
"We could divide them from possible support from Europe," suggested the Foreign Secretary, Doctor Stanford F. Pines, "Make agreements with them before the SPD can. I highly doubt the Kaiserin or the Empress are going to enamored with Schultz going around calling himself President of Europe."
"Fantastic idea," the Prime Minister nodded, "Somebody draft a message for the Volksreich and Majterre!"
-----
TO: The Kaiserin of the Volksreich der Frau; the Empress of Majterre
FROM: The Prime Minister of the Great Britain
CC: King George VII of Great Britain
My esteemed friends;
The Kingdom of Great Britain expresses a formal interest in establishing official diplomatic relations between our great nations. We welcome your diplomats and humbly request permission to do the same.
In the interest of peace and co-operation among the nations of Europe, we would also like to propose a non-aggression pact and a free trade treaty between our nations.
With kindest regards,
Prime Minister E350
London, Great Britain
-----
"Yep, that ought to do it," the Prime Minister nodded, "Any other suggestions?"
"We surrender unconditionally?"
"Rimmer, shut up and keep taking minutes," grunted the Prime Minister.
Arnold J. Rimmer offered his characteristic salute and continued to note down the minutes of the meeting.
The culture secretary, Mabel Pines, raised her hand eagerly. The Prime Minister nodded.
"Maybe we should try to convince the people supporting Schultz to come back to us?" she asked, "Remind them that we need to stick together!"
"We could send the King to make an address to him," suggested Ford, "He's popular."
"Do you really think that's wise, sir?" asked Wilson, "What would happen if he gets shot?"
"Prince William becomes king?" shrugged the Prime Minister, "I mean, he's young and handsome and he's have the advantage of succeeding a martyr. That's a bonus, all things considered."
The cabinet regarded the Prime Minister with shock.
"I'm not hoping he dies!" said the Prime Minister, crossing his arms, "I'm just answering Wilson's question."
"Alright," said Wilson, "So, we reach out to Europe while launching a propaganda campaign at home. This is sounds fairly straight-forward...what do you suggest the army do?"
"I say we dig in for now," replied Pearl, "We have our defensive boosts, after all. Let them start the war."
"And if worse comes to worse, we can send Pearl out to duel Schultz," the Prime Minister added.
"Are you sure the public will accept another duel so soon after your engagement with Mr. Corbyn?" asked Wilson.
"Only if we're at war, and hopefully we can still avoid that," shrugged the Prime Minister, "Right, that's the civil war issue given it's fifteen minutes; I want to talk about railways..."
-----
Misc. Non-Action Diplomatic Messages;
TO: The United States of America
FROM: The Kingdom of Great Britain
Great Britain harshly condemns the policies of your government with a Strongly Worded Letter indicating our Disapproval with your methods. We have also learned from the past and will not be sending you any jet engine parts.
TO: The Empress of Majterre
FROM: The Prime Minister
In light of the domestic issues I am currently facing, I must decline to attend your feast. I am, however, prepared to send an official envoy.
TO: [REDACTED]
FROM: The Prime Minister
We have reviewed your character, and in light of your utter lack of redeeming qualities such as nobility, kindness, decency and fairness, we have decided that you are the perfect choice for Attorney-General.
We await your arrival in London, Mr. Blackadder.
TO: The GM
FROM: The Prime Minister
Would roleplaying constitute an action?
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- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,847
TO: Everyone
I propose we team up together to get our hecking lakes back. We might not agree on everything, but I'm sure most of us want to have territorial sovereignty over our lakes.
Also DoubleA, if you're reading this, the offer to buy the lake peacefully is still on the table. But one way or another, we are getting our hecking lakes back.
May Saber give strength to the righteous,
NinjaCow64, Prime Minister for Life of the Australian Capital Territory.
EDIT: This post and the action has been rendered null and void due to diplomatic iniatives later in the thread.
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It shall.
And that's no good.
lol nvm
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THE PROCLAMATION OF THE PROPHET!:
HERE YHE HERE YHE!
I, THE PROPHET OF MINIMALISM, HAVETH A PROCLAMATION!
WE SHALL NOT BE SPAMMING YHE WITH DIPLOMATS, NOR SHALL WE ATTACK SEA DRAGON DOUBLE A!
WE SHALL BE RESTRICTING OURSELVES TO SPREAD OUR PEACEFUL RELIGION IN CHINA. SO THAT MINIMALISM SHALL BEGIN TO HAPPEN!
PRAISE THE DICE!
HERE YHE HERE YHE!
I, THE PROPHET OF MINIMALISM, HAVETH A PROCLAMATION!
WE SHALL NOT BE SPAMMING YHE WITH DIPLOMATS, NOR SHALL WE ATTACK SEA DRAGON DOUBLE A!
WE SHALL BE RESTRICTING OURSELVES TO SPREAD OUR PEACEFUL RELIGION IN CHINA. SO THAT MINIMALISM SHALL BEGIN TO HAPPEN!
PRAISE THE DICE!
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2010
- Messages
- 8,847
Glorious news! We have come to an agreement and DoubleA has agreed to become a citizen of Canberra! This once again makes the lakes of Canberra Canberran! We are so overjoyed by this news that we are spending our action on it!
Action: Make DoubleA a citizen of Canberra.
Action: Make DoubleA a citizen of Canberra.
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