Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[Verarde]

I suddenly become a nice person, keeping the sword, but trying to bring all players together as friends.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I type in "god mode" on console.

15 (13): You manage to prevent impending asphyxiation.

I hold my strange medallion near one of the locks

18: Its alien technology manages to manipulate the internal mechanism and unlock a container containing a bulk shipment of matériel. You help yourself to a combat uniform and lasgun.

I fail.

12 (5): You succeed amicably, overcoming your concussion.

I patheticly break down to arouse sympathy in the guards.

18: So despicable a wreck are you that they toss you some First-Aid Spray™.

Be a person who is too willing to help out others and take on all of civplayah's penalties (but only the ones that don't have to do with losing health. I'm not that nice).

11 (10): A for effort, but F for results.

my bodyguard takes down drum student as i heal

13: You throw the vial at him which manages to knock him down without shattering.

I buy my new lover some coffee.

14: Things really seem to be heating up.

I suddenly become a nice person, keeping the sword, but trying to bring all players together as friends.

10: Deeds, not words, must prove your intention.

 

[Seon]

I bond with the spirit of Nyarlathothep to become the Messenger of the Chthonic Gods

 

[Darth Caesar]

I spray myself down and start to feel better about myself.

 

[!!!!!]

i help drum student to bring all players together as friends.

 

[landlubber]

I take a deep breath and ask her out.

 

[mythmonster2]

Take a snooze to get over my embarrassment.

 

[Abaddon]

I make my way to the brig.

 

[civplayah]

I discover a way to get the worst rolls possible.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I bond with the spirit of Nyarlathothep to become the Messenger of the Chthonic Gods

5 (1): You are consumed by the evil that is Nyarlathotep, your body becoming a puppet to his will. Actions you take running contradictory to his objectives will invert the final roll; conversely, your negative SAN provides a bonus when realizing his orders.

I spray myself down and start to feel better about myself.

7: The damn thing runs empty before it takes effect.

i help drum student to bring all players together as friends.

11: It is your destiny.

I take a deep breath and ask her out.

6: She smiles, leans across the table, and whispers: "I don't bat for your team."

Take a snooze to get over my embarrassment.

14 (13): You wake up so groggy you can't even remember what you were unhappy about.

I make my way to the brig.

19: Seeing you armoured, but not seeing your face, the security staff jumps to attention.

I discover a way to get the worst rolls possible.

10 (5): You discover an exploit whereby affixing $INT_OVERRIDE_MODIFIER and suffixing an integer to your action, you will boost your final roll by that number. There is, however, the risk that a large discrepancy between the base roll and the outcome will alert Dr. Hax.

 

[Darth Caesar]

I wait until I arrive at the destination and see what they do to me.

 

[civplayah]

I just drop all these modifiers- I want to get back to the game!!!

 

[Abaddon]

I order them to jettison the brigs cells into space

 

[mythmonster2]

Get a cup of coffee.

 

[!!!!!]

i find mythmonster2 then i ask him i f he wants to be my ally
EDIT: i use my money to complete mythmonster2's medical training

 

[mythmonster2]

(You don't need to do that as an action mate, it's a free action.)

I accept !!!!!'s proposal. Friendship FTW!

 

[Seon]

I dress myself in Nyarlathothep worshipper's attire: white suit, a white fedora, a cane, and a permanantly glazed smile.

 

[landlubber]

I convince her to go on just one date with my manly charm.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I wait until I arrive at the destination and see what they do to me.

This might take a while...

I just drop all these modifiers- I want to get back to the game!!!

5 (3): You pick up a random and vaguely-described modifier that negates the curse.

I order them to jettison the brigs cells into space

2: "That's structurally impossible, sir!"

Get a cup of coffee.

3 (4): The God-awful brew saps you of 13 hitpoints.

i use my money to complete mythmonster2's medical training

10 (13): You buy him his degree for $200.

I dress myself in Nyarlathothep worshipper's attire: white suit, a white fedora, a cane, and a permanantly glazed smile.

16 (16): The sharp ensemble conveys an air of subtle menace that provides a +3 bonus to intimidation.

I convince her to go on just one date with my manly charm.

15: Amused by your determination, she agrees. The ensuing dinner restores 17 hitpoints.

!!!!! and mythmonster2 have formed a pact! They're an Army of Two™.

 

[landlubber]

I ask her if she'd be willing to go on a second date, despite her lesbian.