Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[civplayah]

I smite Seon.

You shouldn't have messed with God, Seon.

 

[Seon]

God came back and fired you, civplayah.

 

[TheLastOne36]

God likes me enough to send me one full revive (also from the Pokemon Series. ) to revive me after I am dead.

 

[Earthling]

I can pick up some awesome food when I get to Odessa. All we've got here are cactus for now...but:

I catch a Road Runner (cartoon version) who's amazing agility is more than enough to tow my car along to the speed for the time travel mechanism to activate; the car part doesn't matter so much. Beep Beep! That's All 1982 Folks!

 

[Abaddon]

Cast Soul Reave on MM2.

The Cult can continue to attack.


Can there be some effect on the fact im home... and he is in HELL? I mean, he should have to die to be here?

 

[GenMarshall]

I pick up the knife and continue to the headquarters

 

[kill fire]

While choxorn kills TLO, I take a breather.

EDIT: Yay for typos!

 

[choxorn]

Can there be some effect on the fact im home... and he is in HELL? I mean, he should have to die to be here?

Since when did this game make since?

 

[Perfection]

PERFECTION BURSTS INTO THE SCENE GUNS BLAZING!

 

[Anonymoose]

I'll hang around in hell and see if I can pick up a trick or two while I'm here.

 

[tuxedohamm]

Grow flight capable wings and fly to attack the airforce.

 

[Omega124]

I go into a Borders, tugging my machine along, and find a book called "How to get Heroes and Villians in Video Games to cooperatie FOR DUMMIES".

 

[mythmonster2]

Lie in the shadows and whisper words of doubt into Abaddon's cult telling them to join me.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I set my angelic retinue and the brownie fairies onto civplayah while yelling "THIEF! THIEF!"

14: Your horde swarms him for 20 damage.

I land the helicopter on top of TLO to crush him and finally kill him.

14: You hear a crunch.

I smite Seon.

14: You hit Seon with your shovel for 12 damage.

God likes me enough to send me one full revive (also from the Pokemon Series. ) to revive me after I am dead.

12: You receive the Scales of Justice (free action to use)... and hold onto one hitpoint.

I catch a Road Runner (cartoon version) who's amazing agility is more than enough to tow my car along to the speed for the time travel mechanism to activate; the car part doesn't matter so much. Beep Beep! That's All 1982 Folks!

3 (2): He's pulling the car the wrong way! The time travel mechanism is drained of all power!

Cast Soul Reave on MM2.

2 (2): You syphon 2 hitpoints out of him.

I pick up the knife and continue to the headquarters

8 (9): You can spot guards patrolling the entrance.

While choxorn kills TLO, I take a breather.

5: Nothing of interest occurs.

PERFECTION BURSTS INTO THE SCENE GUNS BLAZING!

"All player slots are currently reserved. Please try again next round."

I'll hang around in hell and see if I can pick up a trick or two while I'm here.

17: You and your posse will now gain strength with each foe defeated.

Grow flight capable wings and fly to attack the airforce.

9: You grow wings that are nothing more than decorative. Confident with their air superiority, the armed forces send in the marines.
ROLL TO DODGE!
5: Heavy suppressing fire deals 15 damage.

I go into a Borders, tugging my machine along, and find a book called "How to get Heroes and Villians in Video Games to cooperatie FOR DUMMIES".

6: You find the book, but you have no cash with which to purchase it.

Lie in the shadows and whisper words of doubt into Abaddon's cult telling them to join me.

17: Their mindlessness outweighs their fanaticism, and you manage to convert them to your side.

 

[Seon]

I buff my horde attacking civplayah with blessings

 

[TheLastOne36]

What do you mean by free action to use?

 

[choxorn]

After briefly contemplating why TLO is still alive, I steal his scales of justice and hit him with a pathetically weak attack to remove his remaining 1 HP.

 

[Perfection]

I SHOTGUN IN A NEW SLOT. TAKE THAT N00BS!

 

[kill fire]

I slap TLO if he isn't killed this turn by anyone else. If he is, then I continue to rest.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

What do you mean by free action to use?

Its success is not determined by rolls of the die; like diplomatic talk, it can be performed in addition to a "standard" action.