Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[mythmonster2]

I think I want to retreat to the Ultimate Weapon.

 

[!!!!!]

I melt my gold coconut and put it on my shield.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I think I wanna hurt mythmonster.

1: mythmonster hurt you, for 30 damage.

I examine the purple crystal again.

1: A beam of sunlight refracts right into your eye for 15 damage. You lose sight in your right eye and suffer a -2 penalty to actions requiring visual coordination.

I demand to know why I got a 1! I should have gotten a 0!

Anyways, I get better..

(I cap net rolls at 1 and 20. 0 would probably mean instant death.)

9 (7): A -3 hp short-circuit dispels the myth.

Can we look at something besides myself? Please?

19: You spy a cargo ship, fully-loaded and seemingly in distress.

I attempt to send away for a mail order degree in archeology again.

8: You don't know where to apply to.

I think I want to retreat to the Ultimate Weapon.

13: You take up position in your little fort.

I melt my gold coconut and put it on my shield.

5: You melt the gold, all right.
ROLL TO DODGE!
12 (14): The molten liquid does not pour over you, but over your shield, increasing its net worth by about 200%.

kill fire's mafia members have arrived with transportation.

 

[Double A]

The Covies heal me in their ship by giving me an Energy Sword (it heals my confidence!)

 

[civplayah]

Great. I think I'll tear apart some of my house to build a weapon.

 

[mythmonster2]

I fire at civplayah.

 

[landlubber]

I signal the cargo ship with a cannon flare.

 

[GenMarshall]

Rebecca, Bill and I head into the basement

 

[merciary]

I send applications to the following places; Oxford, The Ohio State, and the local college hoping to get at least one to accept me.

 

[bestrfcplayer]

Can I rejoin?

 

[Double A]

You have to roll to.

 

[bestrfcplayer]

Well, in that case, my action: I rejoin the game.

 

[Seon]

I fail.

 

[Double A]

Watch Seon roll a 20.

 

[!!!!!]

i work for the medical school and gain money and any thing else they have to give me like a better medical job

 

[Abaddon]

I stop choking.

 

[remake20]

I gather supplies to build a large house.

 

[kill fire]

Me and Horace get on the boat and go back to Ukraine

 

[Anonymoose]

I MUNCH on some more grass.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

The Covies heal me in their ship by giving me an Energy Sword (it heals my confidence!)

12: It's a somewhat faulty make, but it does restore 8 hitpoints.

I think I'll tear apart some of my house to build a weapon.

3: You get a nasty splinter for 16 damage.

I fire at civplayah.

14: You further his suffering by 14 damage.

I signal the cargo ship with a cannon flare.

3: The recoil rocks your boat violently.
ROLL TO DODGE!
9: You take on some water, but not enough to threaten your seaworthiness.

Rebecca, Bill and I head into the basement

6: You trip down the stairs.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18: You make a smooth recovery into a corvette.

I send applications to the following places; Oxford, The Ohio State, and the local college hoping to get at least one to accept me.

11: Your applications are mailed off.

rejoin the game.

4: You rejoin with 50 hitpoints, since it's already too crowded.

I fail.

11 (9): You feel mildly successful.

i work for the medical school and gain money and any thing else they have to give me like a better medical job

2: You botch an operation, have your degree suspended, and are forced to recompense the grieving family with $2000 that you don't have.

I stop choking.

9: You fail to administer the Heimlich manoeuvre to yourself.

I gather supplies to build a large house.

2: A tree falls toward you.
ROLL TO DODGE!
20: Incredulously, a domino effect creates a commendable log cabin.

Me and Horace get on the boat and go back to Ukraine

19: The trip back is unbelievably faster than the trip down, and you arrive in Odesa.

I MUNCH on some more grass.

4: You swallow a bug whose awful taste smothers 6 hitpoints.