Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[hoplitejoe]

We shall make our own village! where man and rhino can live together without fear of judging eyes.

 

[Dhoomstriker]

1: Guns 'n Magic aren't a good mix. It explodes violently, inflicting 20 damage to everyone in the area.

Using my medical knowledge and supplies from the library's nursing station, I heal everyone who was affected by the wand's blast.

 

[Terrance888]

I gather a horde of lions to assault Mythmonster2.

 

[mythmonster2]

Assault a dead guy? Best plan I've ever heard.

 

[Terrance888]

With you as my standard, i shall fulfill my destiny.

 

[mythmonster2]

Your destiny is to unite the lions. How is maiming my corpse going to help with that?

 

[hendo]

I ask the Master what he thinks mine and Dhoomstriker's quest should be.

 

[Terrance888]

You tried to stop me. Your body will be on my banner.

 

[Skwink]

I convince Samuel he is a girl.

 

[EnglishCrusader]

But not before I kill you! I reload my MAC-50 and shoot more! (BANG BANG BANG)

 

[Abaddon]

I buy a lucky charm with my money.

 

[CivCube]

I enter a nearby cave and undergo a vision quest.

 

[GenMarshall]

I find gold.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Sorry for the delay. The weekend was exceptionally busy, and the next may be too.

I ask to join the government forces.

10: You have no government forces to ask.

I present the hyenas with my bounty.

3: OH NO THEY'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED!

I throw away the used rifle bullet and the AK-47, and search for a new weapon.

4: They bounce off the side of the pit and hit you for 14 damage.

We shall make our own village! where man and rhino can live together without fear of judging eyes.

4 (5): After hours of exhausting scavenging, you have barely enough sticks to make a sundial at the expenditure of 6 hitpoints.

Using my medical knowledge and supplies from the library's nursing station, I heal everyone who was affected by the wand's blast.

1 (4): DRAT. It's bad magic, and reacts badly to your attempt to intervene, dealing an additional 8 damage to everyone.

I gather a horde of lions to assault Mythmonster2.

20: You lay waste to his corpse.

I ask the Master what he thinks mine and Dhoomstriker's quest should be.

14 (14): Take control of the rebel group, and then exploit Skwink's salient into Mexico to seize the country; from there, WORLD DOMINATION!

I convince Samuel he is a girl.

5 (3): He gags you so you don't distract him.

I reload my MAC-50 and shoot more! (BANG BANG BANG)

20: ONE HITPOINT LEFT.

I buy a lucky charm with my money.

16: You spend eight bucks for a trinket that boosts your rolls by 1.

I enter a nearby cave and undergo a vision quest.

13: "Oooh, dancing animals!"

I find gold.

9: Not a lot of open mines around here.

 

[Terrance888]

I eat it for the HP!

 

[Red_Spy]

I run to my allies Russia for help.

 

[landlubber]

I begin my hunt for the hyena caper.

 

[Dhoomstriker]

1 (4): DRAT. It's bad magic, and reacts badly to your attempt to intervene, dealing an additional 8 damage to everyone.

Combining my knowledge of magic (to counter the bad magic), engineering, and healing, as well as some of my popsicle sticks and some of my duct tape, I convert the library's vending machine into a passive healing machine that heals all of my allies when they are within its vicinity.

14 (14): Take control of the rebel group, and then exploit Skwink's salient into Mexico to seize the country; from there, WORLD DOMINATION!

OOC: Since the Master was delirious when he made that comment, I say that we reject that idea as insane ramblings. I sent help to Skwink because I support him staying alive... I don't see a reason to go and turn around and fight him and his rebel allies. A much more peace-oriented quest would be preferable.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Who said anything about killing them..?

 

[Skwink]

I get mad at Sam and gag her back.