Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[kill fire]

Why the hate?

 

[GenMarshall]

I along with Bill and Rebecca exit the hotel

 

[mythmonster2]

I attempt to slit KFC's throat.

 

[kill fire]

Wouldn't you like, fall off?

 

[mythmonster2]

I'm hoping for a good dodge roll.

 

[Abaddon]

I start crying again

 

[Double A]

Why the hate?

Even someone who didn't play TF2 would know.

 

[kill fire]

What, you mean the spy? What about him?

 

[Seon]

Why the hate?

Because random shooting is fun

 

[Double A]

What, you mean the spy? What about him?

Red Heavy: "BOOM! Entire other team is babies!"
Red Medic: "I am fully charged!"
"Red" Spy: *stabs medic*
Red Heavy: "NOOOOOO!" *gets torn apart by Blue Heavy*
Blue Spy: *Cloaks and runs away*

 

[kill fire]

Actually, compared to some of the other classes, the Spy isn't that annoying. Now the Pyro is annoying as .

*Red team is charging through Blu defenses killing everyone*
Red Soldier: Nice work!
Blu Pyro: HUDDA HUDDA HU! *w+m1*
Red Spy: I do believe I'm on fire.
Red Soldier: I! AM! ON! FIRE!
Red Scout: AAAUGH!
Blu Pyro: HUHUHUHU! *runs away*
Red Team: AAAAAAAAAAAAH! *dies*

 

[choxorn]

The Pyro isn't that annoying. Now, the sniper...

Red Heavy: Waaa... Waaaaa.... AHAHAHAA!!
Blue Sniper: *Kills entire red team with a few sniper shots*
*Red Team Dies*

 

[kill fire]

Only on 2fort .

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

I fly up into the air again.

19: With a mighty surge of strength, you overcome your mortal limitations and blast into the sky. mythmonster2 is not so aerodynamic, and plummets to the ground, surviving, but less 30 hitpoints.

Uh... we look for some pizza to eat while we wait for the UNSC ships to arrive.

15 (16): It's a damn good pizza.

yes, my first 20! we invent some medical thingy in my rudimentary clinic

3: IT'S A MONSTER!!
ROLL TO DODGE!
20: It's a jackal-type creature that can "smell" diseases and features an intrinsic, if rudimentary knowledge of first aid.

I punch the rhino and get the EMT's attention.

2: The rhino slams you against the ground for 19 damage.

Ooh, I want the rhino! I offer him/her some counseling to overcome their issues.

19: "Why did he punch me? I wasn't doing anything wrong, was I? It was very... very rude. It's because I'm short-sighted, I bet. No respect. No respect for the rhino."
The rhino joins your team.

The Medic and I get beamed up to the Covie ship, where we are given new medic guns/healed (I think you can figure out who gets what).

2: "OMFG DON'T SMOKE AROUND THE-"
ROLL TO DODGE!
18: Thinking quickly, you fill the sky with shrapnel that area-of-effects kill fire for 16 damage.

I destroy kill fire with patriotism (nukes, etc)

3: WHAT ARE THIS ROBOT HAVE NO EMOTION LOGIC ERROR ABORT ABORT
13 hitpoints' worth of circuitry fries.

I along with Bill and Rebecca exit the hotel

16: You step out into the street as a motorcade passes by.

I attempt to slit KFC's throat.

1: He grabs the knife from you and, after letting you fall, hurls it into your chest. You suffer immediate 26 damage, and ongoing -10 hitpoints until the wound is properly administered to.

I start crying again

10: It wasn't very effective.

 

[!!!!!]

i run over kill fire with my backhoe
wait can i hit kill fire in mid air or do i have to change my roll
if so then I work and get promoted

 

[kill fire]

Jesus is the whole world out to get me?

Screw you guys, I'm getting out of here.

I fly to a safe area where I cannot be tracked.

 

[choxorn]

Great... we... uh... continue eating pizza and wait for something awesome to happen?

 

[mythmonster2]

Oh snap! Signal to the Covies to pick me up.

 

[Seon]

I start building a super computer

 

[Abaddon]

I cause any talk of team fortress (after this one) to cause a -1 to the commentors roll.