That's of course very true, and what I said is a bit of a cliche. A short story, the last girl I was truly crazy about, I held back because she was someone I knew it would be difficult to build a real sound relationship with. She had this tendency to feel trapped, you see, and I didn't want to trap her. If it were today, it would be because I wouldn't want her to feel trapped. At the time I thought that, but really I was just afraid she'd bail. And I had already liked her for far too long.
The truth was when I got truly affectionate she responded well to it--sort of. She was blustering as much as I was. Even still I didn't realize that until later, too interested in playing it cool. We didn't confess the extent of our feelings, not perfectly even but definitely further than we shared, until after we broke up. The damage was done, and there wasn't much getting back together. Honestly if I had just gone for it, yeah it would have crashed and burned. But it crashed and burned anyway. No use wearing a seatbelt when your trying to protect yourself from getting hit with a baseball bat. Or something. It's better to at least be unconstrained and give a good swing yourself before being knocked down. This metaphor is terrible. lmfao. The point is, I could have lived it fully, better, and more honestly.
If I had simple oddness, that would be great. Unfortunately, I have a bad case of the insanities. 
