While We Wait: Boredom Strikes Back

[Dachs]

Pretty sure everybody knows my name.

 

[Daftpanzer]

something about badgers?

Also I know spryllino's real name is Mephisto Vermillion Exelscior XVII

 

[Adrogans]

Pretty sure you spelled it wrong.

 

[spryllino]

XVII is an erroneous counting because it counts everyone who's ever been head of the family; I'm actually XII going straight back in the male line, which is actually how we count it. Of course, because my father's alive I shouldn't theoretically have a number at all according to the Vermillion naming conventions, and the proper form for an eldest son is actually to put the Excelsior first, so you should refer to me as Excelsior Mephisto Vermillion the Younger. But I forgive you the mistake.

 

[Lord_Iggy]

Wait, Daft, I thought that you were Lord Vermilion Mephisto III. Any relation here?

 

[Daftpanzer]

XVII is an erroneous counting because it counts everyone who's ever been head of the family; I'm actually XII going straight back in the male line, which is actually how we count it. Of course, because my father's alive I shouldn't theoretically have a number at all according to the Vermillion naming conventions, and the proper form for an eldest son is actually to put the Excelsior first, so you should refer to me as Excelsior Mephisto Vermillion the Younger. But I forgive you the mistake.

oh, sorry!!!! Please forgive any offence to the Vermillion family. I will be sure to address you as Excelsior Mephisto Vermillion the Younger!

lol: )

PS: my own name is quite unusual, I had fun looking up what the fore and sir names may have derived from. I settled on Nicolas L'étrange, and you may all address me as such, if you wish.

EDIT: Iggy, I lied. I just wanted to pretend I was related to the awesomeness.

 

[spryllino]

No, no, of course not, Iggy. The Mephistones Vermilliones and the Vermilliones Mephistones are two completely different families.

 

[Lord_Iggy]

As I suspected.

 

[Anonymoose]

Pretty sure everybody knows my name.

Of course, Jimbert, how could we forget?

 

[Dachs]

har de har

 

[Angst]

I don't know your name Dachs, so it's a good thing you were only pretty sure.

 

[Kentharu]

Seven quarts on Iggy.

Go Team Penguin!

 

[flyingchicken]

Link to video.

and another one gone
and another one gone
another one bites the dust

 

[flyingchicken]

Here is on of the piss-poor games I loved as a kid. It, alongside the Age of Empires: Rise of Rome demo, fostered my love for half-naked men fighting in bronze and iron:

Spoiler :

Now, let's pick a scenario. How about... some good, old-fashioned greekfaggery!

Ah, yes, if we're going for greekfaggery, we're going for the epitome of greekfaggery; the Wars of the Diadochi!

Treachery! Was it murder? How can it be treachery if it wasn't? Or is this like that part at the end of Batman Begins spoiler alert where Batman refuses to save Liam Neeson? Who knows – who cares!

While I completely forgot how to play this game, I switched the difficulty from Slave ("easy," presumably) to General ("medium"); if you were wondering, the next and last level is Imperator.

Now it's time to pick who to play as. Presenting the usual suspects:

While I was tempted to go for Seleucos simply because he's the most handsome of the bunch, I went with my favorite (for no adequately explained reason):

The music plays. AND SO IT BEGINS.

(There's only one piece of turn-to-turn music in the whole game, and it is attached.)

Apparently I'm in Jerusalem and it's June, 323 BC, and the army is friggin' bankrupting me (thank you captain obvious!)! What's my army made of anyway?

What the crap is this? I was expecting rank upon ranks of phalanxes, not a few thousand hill tribesmen chucking spears around! Well, at least Eumenes himself is a decent general:

Hm, let's take a look at the scope for this scenario, using the map overview:

... and I thought Paradox made terrible maps. Oh well, at least I can make out the landmasses, sort of.

Well, I'm completely lost on what I should do first. IIRC you need boats to cross water, so going for Alexandria will need sea power. To the east is Seleucos in Babylon, and going up from there is Antigonos in Damascus and Cleitos in "Port Ugarit" which probably should've been greekified at least if it can't be an ahistorical and Seleucos-free Antioch there.

 

[Dachs]

oh god what is that nonsense

the transliterations MAKE NO SENSE

what is Eumenes doing in Jerusalem of all places

on the bright side, Eumenes is boss

 

[Anonymoose]

fc is hilarious. and omg Eumenes is my favorite.

 

[das]

Eumenes, the best. Shut up, Dachs, I'll go on a reading marathon of your histories soon.

 

[Lord of Elves]

Shameless plug for The Bloody Business a Second World War-centered NESlite, focused on gameplay, with minimal stats. Looking specifically for a player to take over imperial Japan, although anyone wishing to play other countries is welcome.

EDIT: Now accepting orders for the fourth update.

 

[Birdjaguar]

I get my copy of "dances with dragons" tomorrow!!

 

[Shadowbound]

Spoiler :

Snape Kills Dumbledore