Comedy Improv One-Liner Contest Thread, Part Two

[Lord Baal]

I'll take it. I've got nothing better to do.

Love is like a monkey:

 

[member66170]

Craps over everything you care about

 

[Dumanios]

Stupid,Furry and Scientists say it is our ancestor

 

[BurnEmDown]

Keeps swinging one way to another

 

[Fr8monkey]

Love is like a monkey: First you think; "How cute... I love it!". Then, when you least expect it, the creature you liked rips your face off and flings poo at you.

No, not any bitter experiences over here...

 

[Lord Baal]

Well, it's been more than a day, so even though there's only four people, I'll pick a winner.

Lord Olleus. Not that good, but none of them were, really. You're up.

 

[Fr8monkey]

I declare myself the winner! Why is this so difficult?


I can sum my day up in 5 smilies...

 

[Dumanios]

(I'm asleep),I'm at school),(I'm at home),(I'm on the computer and (I'm asleep again)

 

[Joecoolyo]

Weekends/Summer Vacation= (Sleep) (Eat) (After Breakfast nap) (Computer time) (Sleep)

Every other day= (Waking Up too early) (School work) (School work) (School work) (Going to bed too late)

 

[dwaxe]

I like my women like I like my sky...

 

[_random_]

With as little covering imaginable.

 

[Fugitive Sisyphus]

I like my women like I like my sky: with large white puffy things.

 

[Dumanios]

With nothing in the way!

 

[Perfection]

 

[dwaxe]

"I like my women like I like my sky: with nothing in the way!"

Not many entries and Dumanios wins this one.

 

[Dumanios]

I like my civ games like I like my School/Job...

 

[warpus]

I like my civ games like I like my job - they take up too much of my time and in the end somebody compares me to Dan Quayle

 

[Lord Baal]

I like my civ games like I like my School/Job...

They keep me away from the girlfriend for extended periods of time.

 

[Zack]

nonexistent.

 

[LAnkou]

The number I will see at the end will be at least 6 figures long...