How do you manage your emotions?

[Kaitzilla]

Emotions are the one thing that separates us from our future robot masters.
But, they are a pain to deal with sometimes.

What are your main go-to methods when you are feeling something and you want to change it?
Vote in the poll!

"For many years, I was a raw nerve.
Like the Hulk, but without the muscles

Even songs would push me around emotionally.
It gradually dawned on me, I was too easy to influence.

Say something nice to someone, you'll make them feel good. (Flattery)
Say something mean to someone, you'll make them feel bad. (Jerk)

People are like Amoebas!
I love to poke them."

-- World's Worst Human Being, the Troll

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Say it with smileys:










But seriously, my coping methods depend on the circumstances. I swore at my TV tonight (good thing the nearest neighbors aren't totally fluent in English). I've learned to not get upset over things that fall on the floor as long as they aren't breakable or they don't get damaged/dirty in any way that matters. I just remind myself that "gravity works" and takes no notice of whether or not humans want it to work.

Listening to Yanni or Enya really helps with bad moods and depression.

I really need a "Keep Calm and Hug A Cat" sign. Even if it's the cat that just caused the rotten mood by upchucking on the carpet or knocking stuff off the table or trying to dig to the center of the Earth via the blankets and mattress on the bed.

I used to be able to put in my Sim City game and bulldoze a bunch of cities down to bare scorched ground and ignore all the whining and wailing about loss of power, no more roadways, and so on. If they got too annoying, I'd give them earthquakes, fires, monsters, plane crashes... but alas, that was when I still had my Amiga.

 

[Hrothbern]

nice question... difficult to answer in boxes...
I did choose free spirit..... but I do not like to burden other people that much with what happens with me in a really extrovert way... though I do vent it to some or more degree depending on who and what.

My normal reaction is to let it happen...embrace it... for a short while...
and normally that is enough to get peace with it... and normally other emotions pop up giving balance for the whole

And if the occurrence or magnitude of the emotion is unexpected big or small... I reflect on it to understand/feel the why... at least to something that enables to position it
And if that is unsatisfying, I put it aside, have a night sleep, or wait until in another mood, and pick it up again, reflect again.

All emotions as they manifest are part of me, my mates.... we are in the same boat.

No need to agree with any of them, no need to delete any of them, part of the team, but I control who has the rudder.

 

[Kyriakos]

Well, i use a few thousand auto-repression mechanisms, which sort of had their own offspring and thus barely feel anything by now
I like to think of it as outsourcing, but it mostly resembles a bad deal with the mafia.

 

[aimeeandbeatles]

I try not to think about it too much, mainly.

 

[Mise]

I reflect and unpack my emotions. Of course, the first step is acknowledging that you are, in fact, feeling an emotion. Then, it's "what am I feeling"? Why am I feeling this way? Is it reasonable to feel this way? What can I do to fix this? Talking this through with other people helps, as long as you're open and honest with yourself (and them obviously).

 

[Kyriakos]

Feelings are supposed to be more primordial than thoughts. Eg one theory is that early man had to rely on feelings (such as joy or disgust) so as to be able instinctively to do or not do stuff, like have sex (joy) or not eat something which would result to his death (disgust at the taste etc).

Some philosophical theories propose a link of emotion and thought at some level (even Kant does so), but imo emotions (thoughts too, just on a different level) are there for ultimately reasons tied to the human organism itself as a thing not primarily having to do with the external world. Emotions seem to exist (to be general) so that you can release something or take in something or be led to something useful somatically, while thoughts are more about a need to contain unknown emotions and dangers while at the same time (seemingly or not) making it easier for you to achieve similar (or other) positive things. Afterall, neurosis by definition occurs when your thought-system prevents you from getting something you need emotionally.

 

[Live trash can]

I think most unwanted emotions are a result of an unnatural desire. Strong desires lead to failures. These failures are unnatural, in my vocabuary, they are based on a misconcetption. If you desire good things you are less likely to experience these negative emotions. Even when you fail to accomplish what you try to do.

edit:
I feel I have waisted enough time on silly desires. But it is also about your life situation and your age!

 

[Kyriakos]

I think most unwanted emotions are a result of an unnatural desire. Strong desires lead to failures. These failures are unnatural, in my vocabuary, they are based on a misconcetption. If you desire good things you are less likely to experience these negative emotions. Even when you fail to accomplish what you try to do.

I think this may be true, to a degree at least, if by 'unnatural' you mean specifically something generally identified as unethical (but in a very obvious way; eg to kill or to do other clearly negative and also unjust action). Yet even if so, one would imagine that beyond some level this is also a mental construction (ie that some disgust towards acts like murder or other acts of this type, is not there due to automatic or innate disgust, but again due to mental balances which in theory can alter).
I am not too sure of this, myself. I have experienced disgust at bad urges, yet i am not sure how deep this goes. Ultimately i think it is more likely that unknown variables play the more important part here too.

 

[Ryika]

I can't remember when I've ever had emotions that I felt like I need to get rid of. Well, sometimes I get triggered on the internet, but I sort of enjoy that state of being, and other than that... I don't know, I think I'm just a very balanced person, emotionally mature, and overall so much better than all of you when it comes to a healthy mental state. Sorry.

 

[Alquest]

There is just one answer, which provides the answers to the questions to come.

Wear sunscreen!

 

[Perfection]

 

[yung.carl.jung]

For me, there are no unwanted emotions. If I feel anger, I embrace it. Self-hatred merely leads to self-reflection, which in my case mostly leads to action. Melancholy to me is the most beautiful of all emotions. I celebrate it. I do think I am a highly emotive and empathetic man and that is a blessing. A few days ago my girlfriend told me that, for the first two years of our relationship, there was pretty much not a single day where I was in a "bad mood". Definitely an exaggeration, but I do feel like being happy, playful and at peace with my surroundings is kind of my regular state of being. So many small things make me happy. I don't really understand why that is, I can only observe that phenomenon. Even the slightest thing, like her buying a carton of organic eggs so I can make a perfect french omelette for breakfast can change an entire day, the feeling of bliss still lingers on. Sometimes it's a word she says I like, sometimes it's a friend calling after a long time, sometimes it's me doing something for myself. I am extremely receptive to all (perceived) positive influences.

For the same reason it feels utterly absurd to me to listen to cheerful music when I'm down. If I really do feel depressed I want to entertain the mood and listen to something utterly sad, crushing, heavy, until it has worn off. One thing that does work for me is physical exercise. I also self-medicate in different ways, but that is definitely due to addiction and has little to do with managing my emotions. So for me very few options in the poll fit.

I think most unwanted emotions are a result of an unnatural desire. Strong desires lead to failures. These failures are unnatural, in my vocabuary, they are based on a misconcetption. If you desire good things you are less likely to experience these negative emotions. Even when you fail to accomplish what you try to do.

How can desire ever be natural or unnatural? Desire is something that arises in you. You could argue that desire may also arise due to outside factors, but still then I don't think the natural - unnatural dichotomy really helps there in any way.

 

[Live trash can]

How can desire ever be natural or unnatural? Desire is something that arises in you. You could argue that desire may also arise due to outside factors, but still then I don't think the natural - unnatural dichotomy really helps there in any way.

Like you said, desire can arise from outside forces making you believe certain things. When I say desire can be unnatural I am discriminating between what I think of as Genuine desires, desires the way things were meant to be, and desires that don't really lead anywhere good. This belief is obviously built on an extensive set of beliefs, but people tend to agree on some things being more genuine. Like classical music, nature and love.

When it comes to embracing one's feelings, I agree that they should be sort of embraced, except perhaps anger.

 

[Gori the Grey]

Poorly

 

[Broken_Erika]

I don't; My emotions manage me.

 

[warpus]

I've learned over the years that it's normal to feel a variety of various feelings throughout your life. You'll feel depressed a bit on tuesday, happy on friday, get sad on wednesday, etc. It's all normal, so I embrace my feelings, and I just swear a lot when I'm angry. When I'm happy I swear as well

 

[Marla_Singer]

I"ve lived very difficult years professionally. I think that talking about your own issues don't help as it only contributes to make you totally obsessional about it.

What worked for me was, first medication (anxiolitics, mainly bromazepam), second forcing distractions to limit obsessions, finding a way to think about nothing.

I always liked learning stuff on the internet, but I simply couldn't focus anymore. So I started watching TONS of health and wellness videos on youtube. And eventually, I ended up finding people playing at Mario on youtube, and that worked the best to me! Watching the little dude jumping on turtles totally frees the mind. It makes you think of nothing at all, I could watch that for hours untill falling asleep.

But in the end, I only felt really relieved after having finally found a new job.

 

[Kyriakos]

I"ve lived very difficult years professionally. I think that talking about your own issues don't help as it only contributes to make you totally obsessional about it.

What worked for me was, first medication (anxiolitics, mainly bromazepam), second forcing distractions to limit obsessions, finding a way to think about nothing.

I always liked learning stuff on the internet, but I simply couldn't focus anymore. So I started watching TONS of health and wellness videos on youtube. And eventually, I ended up finding people playing at Mario on youtube, and that worked the best to me! Watching the little dude jumping on turtles totally free the mind. It makes you think of nothing at all, I could watch that for hours untill falling asleep.

But in the end, I only felt really relieved after having finally found a new job.

There is the 'Suicidal Mario' meme, where Mario realizes he has been a monster, killing all those turtles for no good reason, and finally commits suicide in his prison cell (he was arrested for his many crimes)

 

[The_J]

Someone would need to define "unwanted" emotions here.
Sometimes I'm angry. Especially when I make stupid mistakes during work. But that's tiny, I curse a bit, then it's gone. Is it unwanted...well...depends on your definition, it just happens, but is not a burden.
Sometimes I'm sad. Especially when I went out in the night and again didn't manage anything. Is that unwanted? It als just happens, it's part of how this thing works, also not a problem in the long run.
I also don't have any really re-occuring bad obessive thoughts. These I'd for sure classify as unwante, but they don't happen anymore.

So my answer is..."I don't have any..."?