The Old Man and the Sea
...
“I will NOT be pushed out of my rightful ancestral home! This flood WILL respect my lineage, and it WILL-”
“With all respect Patriarch, I have been around the worlds of man many times, been to many places you couldn't dream of, and seen many things you'd never imagine and I can confidently tell you water does not work that way.”
“Lord, the door's starting to buckle! And the walls-” “If you don't mind, my Lordship, I'll be on my way now...”
“I AM the PATRIARCH! This castle is my birthright! I will not be told what is right for me in my own family home! Not by man or nature itself! This madness ends HERE!”
To this day Ragel Naprous lives deep in the swamp, his apartment the upmost tower of the inner keep. He is said to avoid even the most basic amenities such as friendly telephone calls and to subsist on dried nuts and figs as he saves the money necessary for dikes, drainage, desalting and desalinization of the ocean.
(With credits to the most recent
http://dementiaofmagic.net/, from which I lifted the lines.)
The Beauty and the handsomest Beast ~ a House Naprous radio and television commercial (aimed at guildsfolk and high-ranking serfs, a former line of Naprous products approved of by the Imperium)
Do you wake up in the morning sometimes and feel as though you are the symbiot beast? That the handsome charioteer lad who drops by the guildstavern has seen prettier girls in every port? Or perhaps your liege will never recognize you for your natural beauty?
Fret no more! Naprous cosmetics will soon be available at guildshops, Naprous outlets and noble subcontractors. With such products as high-intensity rosewater, powder rouges for that natural blush and lipsticks of the full color-spectrum the Pancreator has given you many ancient yet simple tools with which to assemble Errovus' Pan-creator given beauty. Be sure to catch her full use of these products as Cathrinn Naprous is married to Dain Kawalen Klorin in the Grand Cathedral of the Church of Universal Light on Errovus Secundus. The most sought-after bachelor in the Known Worlds to be snagged by the least minnow of them all.
(quick snapshots of a sans-makeup Cathrinn in a rotting, waterlogged castle just in from the cold to visit her uncle swap to her skiing with Kawalen in Incillia and at last reclining next to him while sharing a bottle of brandy at the fireside, powder rouge effecting a half-natural blush as the young girl gazes lovingly at the slightly older Kawalen)
For those who can choose, let Naprous give the boost!