Verarde
Pondering Wearing A Hat
I want kids, but I am several years removed from being able to provide for them.
Kids
- Thread starter ELITEOFWARMAN8
- Start date
ELITEOFWARMAN8
King
I have three kids - a 4 year old son and 2 year old twin daughters. Like others have said, having kids completely changes your way of life. It is exhausting, expensive, and for the first probably 10 years you really are dependent to them, not the other way around like you would think would be the case. They challenge you, they anger you, they make you paranoid that they will somehow get hurt or worse.
Yet watching them grow and develop from “blobs” into people with their own free will, personalities, imagination, likes and dislikes is one of the most amazing things you will ever be a part of.
Yet watching them grow and develop from “blobs” into people with their own free will, personalities, imagination, likes and dislikes is one of the most amazing things you will ever be a part of.
Farm Boy
I hope you dance
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2010
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Then you can adopt then?
The reality depends somewhat on where you are. I think the foster placement systems are becoming better about this though not at the same rate everywhere. Direct infant adoption much the same, but many birth mothers forming adoption plans are doing so out of religious conviction and so may not necessarily be inclined to choose a same-sex couple. As always, exceptions to that exist. Adoption is a pretty wild ride, when it isn't slow and boring.
NickyJ
Retired Narrator
Thankfully, I'm still too young to really need to decide. Right now, there answer is no, but it may change eventually.
First of all, I have yet to meet anyone who I would even consider marrying and raising a child with.
Secondly, I'd prefer to have a very reliable source of income, something that could provide for a family. Specifically, something that could allow my wife to stay at home. (This is very important to me. If we raise a child, I want someone to stay at home with the kid full time. I suppose, if the world flipped upside down, I could be the stay-at-home parent, but in the ideal case, she would. That is, of course, if she agreed. If she didn't, then that would be up to discussion.)
Finally, before any of that happens, I would like to be able to spend some time on my own, without anyone depending on me. (Maybe a pet, but you get my point.) I want to explore the world a little, set my feet down firmly somewhere. Earn a living, stuff like that.
First of all, I have yet to meet anyone who I would even consider marrying and raising a child with.
Secondly, I'd prefer to have a very reliable source of income, something that could provide for a family. Specifically, something that could allow my wife to stay at home. (This is very important to me. If we raise a child, I want someone to stay at home with the kid full time. I suppose, if the world flipped upside down, I could be the stay-at-home parent, but in the ideal case, she would. That is, of course, if she agreed. If she didn't, then that would be up to discussion.)
Finally, before any of that happens, I would like to be able to spend some time on my own, without anyone depending on me. (Maybe a pet, but you get my point.) I want to explore the world a little, set my feet down firmly somewhere. Earn a living, stuff like that.
Zack
99% hot gas
Having kids is the ultimate Table Test.
They bring a ton to the table (memories + love + general awesomeness) and take a crapload off of it (money + time + general crappiness).
They bring a ton to the table (memories + love + general awesomeness) and take a crapload off of it (money + time + general crappiness).
Disgustipated
Deity
Speaking of narcism (from my love thread), having kids I think is kind of narcissistic. I would not do so. Why bring kids into a world that will be crap? All this debt that Bush and Obama created will have to be paid by our kids. They won't manage, and the country will collapse. There is nothing but misery in America's future.
Zack
99% hot gas
Oh, please.
Once all of the baby boomers die off, everything will be fine again.
Farm Boy
I hope you dance
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Every generation thinks that of their parent's generation. We're really not so very different, but I guess we will pick out own issues to screw up. I agree though, there is not particular reason for doom and gloom.
Zack
99% hot gas
That's my grandparents' generation, not my parents. I meant that in the sense that once there aren't a million retired people anymore, yada yada yada (i.e. there is not anything inherently wrong with baby boomers, it's just the sheer quantity of old retired/almost-retired people).
Disgustipated
Deity
reminds me of this conspiracy theory I have that government promotes fast food as a way to kill the baby boomers off.
I read somewhere recently that old folks retiring today are the unhealthiest and most over weight ever.
warpus
Sommerswerd asked me to change this
Are you planning on having kids sometime in your life? If so, why?
Right now no, because I am really enjoying this period of financial & temporal independence. My responsibility is limited to my job & house, which means that I have a lot of freedom to travel, which I don't see myself getting over anytime soon
Once I have kids I'll have to dedicate a significant portion of my income and time to "baby maintenance and upkeep", which would just be a huge burden. The world is overpopulated enough as it is, so.. why have kids right now? I have no desire to make such a huge investment of time, money, and tears.
A lot of people see having a baby as a natural stepping stone that everyone should go through at some point in life, usually after college and marriage. I disagree; I see it as an optional thing that you can devote all that time and money to if you want.
Right now I'm in the "no" camp, but I could very well change my mind at some point in the future.
I'm not saying I'll be the next Genghis Khan, but I'm not saying I won't.
NickyJ
Retired Narrator
I assure you my kiddies will be dancing on the graves of everyone who voted no. My imperfect little clones will take over the world!
I'm sensing a conspiracy here.
Zack
99% hot gas
One up him. Go for eight in one night or die trying.
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