Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

[GenMarshall]

In typical Frank fashion, he charms one of the hospital's female nurses into cleaning up Dhoomstriker's wounds by literally hitting on her.

 

[CivCube]

Ouch. I invest in public health infrastructure.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Sorry for these sporadic reports; Tolni is so insistent I barrel through another project that he didn't get orders in...

I sell three of the assault rifles for a trip to Equatorial Guinea.

10: They might be colonial rabid zealots, but they're not so stupid as to buy back their own stolen arms.

I continue to search for Horace.

15 (14): Checking your Horace Radar you descend into the bowels of the sinister complex. As you approach Level 1 Security, you encounter the first member of the insidious Gang of Four: President George, Patron Saint of LOLWAR!

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ROLL FOR INITIATIVE!
10 (10): George has been lying in wait, and strikes before you get a pre-battle challenge in!
ROLL TO DODGE!
15 (12): You narrowly dodge his rapid salvo.

Search the area; there must be something I could scavenge or make use of for the Elder Gods' intrigues.

13: You pick up a cracked and rotting mask that increases your intimidation factor by 1.

In typical Frank fashion, he charms one of the hospital's female nurses into cleaning up Dhoomstriker's wounds by literally hitting on her.

9 (11): They clean up the corpse so the funeral can at least be half-open casket, but he ded, son.

Ouch. I invest in public health infrastructure.

16 (16): Expending $184 and 25 , you develop an efficient and enviable health care system that drastically improves quality of life, netting you your regeneration back and furthering your popularity in the latest election polls.

Omega124 and Tolni are declared AWOL.
CubeCannon swaps hendo and the Construction Worker!

 

[Ailedhoo]

Wearing the mask I seek out any nearby persons and intimidate them into telling me the nature of the area I am in, such as the directions to the nearest airfield and if there is any libraries with books of secrets I can acquire.

 

[CivCube]

I introduce smartphones to my citizenry.

 

[JohannaK]

I sell the assault rifles to someone else.

 

[Omega124]

I make bank somehow to fund my stuff.

 

[hoplitejoe]

i do the fighting

 

[GenMarshall]

I fall asleep while rambling absurd nonsense to myself.

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Wearing the mask I seek out any nearby persons and intimidate them into telling me the nature of the area I am in, such as the directions to the nearest airfield and if there is any libraries with books of secrets I can acquire.

17 (14): You're given directions to the nearest metropolitan centre and hastily sent on your way.

I introduce smartphones to my citizenry.

7 (7): You blow $52 on a promotional campaign when people already know what smartphones are, making you look rather patronizing.

I sell the assault rifles to someone else.

10: Military bases aren't really known as thriving marketplaces.

I make bank somehow to fund my stuff.

14: You found a national bank to help arrange offshore money laundering, netting both your private and state accounts 3% interest per turn.

i do the fighting

15 (14): A three-round burst shaves off 21 of the conniving minister's health.
ROLL TO DODGE!
5 (2): George shoots you right in the spleen for 11 damage and ongoing -8 hitpoints.

I fall asleep while rambling absurd nonsense to myself.

9 (6): Your deluded mutterings keep you up all night, and your fatigue worsens by a point.

CubeCannon swaps Omega124 and the Rhinoceros!

 

[Ailedhoo]

Head to and enter the centre's library; seek out books on social skills, diplomacy and communication so I can improve my social interaction skills; the Elder Gods are going to require followers and tis be a poor shepard who fails to communicate with their flock. I hunt for ancient books of dark power after I have improved my diplomacy so I can ask for directions better.

 

[CivCube]

I check my privilege.

 

[Omega124]

I will myself back to my orgional position

 

[JohannaK]

I leave and hitchhike my way west.

 

[GenMarshall]

I continue to stay awake.

 

[hoplitejoe]

i spray spleen juice in their eyes.

 

[dragonprobably]

Is it too late to join?

If not, I attempt to make a robot dog lawyer who speaks nine different languages.

 

[gay_Aleks]

advance deeper within the Enclave compound via infiltration tactics

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Head to and enter the centre's library; seek out books on social skills, diplomacy and communication so I can improve my social interaction skills; the Elder Gods are going to require followers and tis be a poor shepard who fails to communicate with their flock. I hunt for ancient books of dark power after I have improved my diplomacy so I can ask for directions better.

17 (13): You manage to enter the library without security jumping for the alarm.

I check my privilege.

5 (4): Your public apology comes off as confusing and insincere, and support for your campaign wanes as the other candidates seize the opportunity to slander you as a foreign imperialist.

I will myself back to my orgional position

2: You concentrate with all your might... and manage to induce a massive migraine as your overtaxed brain fails to displace your coordinates in space-time. You suffer 12 damage from a vicious migraine and a -2 penalty to mental defence.

I leave and hitchhike my way west.

6: Unfortunately the nearest road west takes you... deeper into the base.
ROLL TO DODGE!
10: Soldiers shoot at you for 10 damage.

I continue to stay awake.

12 (9): You enter that bizarre state of consciousness where your eyes become oversensitive to movement and you see stuff that's not there. -1 to perception.

i spray spleen juice in their eyes.

12 (11): George screams and claws at his face; he can't retaliate this round, and you get a +2 bonus to attack next turn!

Is it too late to join?

If not, I attempt to make a robot dog lawyer who speaks nine different languages.

5: You have no tools or parts for that project.

advance deeper within the Enclave compound via infiltration tactics

8 (10): So far you can only see one way in or out, and that's probably covered by CCTV.

CubeCannon swaps Ana and the Circle of the Pitchmen!

 

[Omega124]

I regain my 12 hit points back