Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition

Then my fear shall be my muse! I write a screenplay for the writers' group in the Avenue of the Arts.
 
Scout out this space yard; perhaps I can find something that can please the Elder Gods.
 
I stroll into the compound shooting anything that moves.
 
I am too tired and too afraid to call out to Super hendo for help.
 
I'm creating jobs for your people! D:<
 
I start looking for Horace around the base
 
CivCube said:
Then my fear shall be my muse! I write a screenplay for the writers' group in the Avenue of the Arts.
13 (12): Your made-for-TV movie does fairly well on public television, netting you a humble 6 :c5culture:.

Ailedhoo said:
Scout out this space yard; perhaps I can find something that can please the Elder Gods.
5 (6): There does not actually appear to be a plant here at all. The Elder Gods are not pleased, and knock off another SAN point.

JohannaK said:
I stroll into the compound shooting anything that moves.
13: Three bullets knock out three stragglers.

CivGeneral said:
I am too tired and too afraid to call out to Super hendo for help.
15 (12): You are too tired and too afraid to call out to Super hendo for help.

Omega124 said:
I nationalize and liquidize the company Joan got the contract from so he is unable to work on the project
13: You seize the company and scrap the contract.

hoplitejoe said:
I start looking for Horace around the base
10 (9): You encounter some straggling guards.
ROLL TO DODGE!
10 (10): They gang up and scuff you for 2 damage.

Tolni said:
Forwards! They may take our lives, but we'll take theirs first!
18 (19): Heaving a conveniently-placed metal pole, you smash one of the Vertibird's rotors, provoking a domino-style mid-air collision that sends them all crashing to Earth in one hell of a picturesque fireball. Not only are you not anxious anymore, but you and your team get +1 to rolls for the next three turns as you ride the adrenaline rush.

CubeCannon swaps Ailedhoo and the Lesser Hentaibeast!
 
I train my fighting skills in the Corridor of the Clan. If I can feel more powerful, then my fear will be nothing.
 
I rally all stragglers in the compound around my leadership with a concert for charity in which I sing my greatest hits.
 
Frank gathers up Dhoomstriker's Pride of lions and regales them with the story of my defeat of the US forces.
 
Blessed with the lost of another SAN point I prey to the gods in thanks for awaking me further.
 
Omega124 said:
With that said and done, I...

*consultingbthe great book of Red Venus*

Seize the bank accounts of all foreign nationals within Nambia.
4: With most of that demographic having fled during the rebellion, you manage to 'liberate' a measly $17 for the state coffers. In retaliation, the UN imposes economic sanctions that drain the national treasury by -$13/turn as the social safety net struggles with lack of basic supplies.

CivCube said:
I train my fighting skills in the Corridor of the Clan. If I can feel more powerful, then my fear will be nothing.
4 (3): Hoo boy, let's see: Torn ligament, whiplash, sprained ankle, not to mention cuts and bruises all over the body... You lose 19 hitpoints, your regeneration is suspended, and you suffer a -1 penalty to basic defence.

hoplitejoe said:
i scruff'em right back!
15 (15): You beat them up and steal one of their guns.

JohannaK said:
I rally all stragglers in the compound around my leadership with a concert for charity in which I sing my greatest hits.
2 (5): Even in your Ziggy Stardust persona, they recognize you as the player behind India in MP1, AKA Georgian China's Mortal Enemy #4.3; you aren't gonna be able to reason with this mob.
ROLL TO DODGE!
20: Undaunted, you treat them to such a spectacular performance that their tiny, shrivelled minds explode under the sheer awesomeness. You loot $148, four assault rifles, three grenades, and a handgun.

CivGeneral said:
Frank gathers up Dhoomstriker's Pride of lions and regales them with the story of my defeat of the US forces.
16 (18): Frank manages to rally the pride back to fighting morale with his tales of heroism.

Ailedhoo said:
Blessed with the lost of another SAN point I prey to the gods in thanks for awaking me further.
10: You hear a busy signal.

Tolni said:
C'mon boys, we're almost there! Take down their Vertibirds, and this fight's ours!
4 (6): That incoming power armour would seem to contest that.
ROLL TO DODGE!
15 (18): A hastily-arranged ambush breaks their morale, and one of the soldier's necks. You net yourself a suit for yourself that conveys +2 to mêlée and +3 to basic defence, at the cost of -1 mobility.

CubeCannon swaps Hyena Clan and the Rhinoceros Herd!
 
I sell three of the assault rifles for a trip to Equatorial Guinea.
 
Search the area; there must be something I could scavenge or make use of for the Elder Gods' intrigues.
 
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