From the WSJ:
Sports Are Off. It’s Fine.
Sports Are Off. It’s Fine.
We’re all starting to hunker down. We’ll miss March Madness. But let’s keep the big picture in mind.
Let’s start here, because it’s the most important thing right now: “socially distance” yourself. Step away, detach, suspend, cocoon, remove, isolate, “self-quarantine,” “retreat to Camelot,” whatever you want to call it. Take care of yourself, but also others, by lying low and not adding to a widening problem. Consider the bigger picture.
Hibernate for America. Hibernate for Earth.
This isn’t easy. I’ll grant you that. I’m grateful I can be home and work from home. If your job means you’re obligated to still be out there, take care of yourself. If you’re on the front lines of this battle, thank you. Thank you a million times.
The rest of us are trying to figure out creative methods of passing the day. People are actually reading books. Books! Like in the olden days. We’re watching classic movies, even ones without talking robots. That dusty 3,000-piece puzzle of the Grand Canyon in your closet is under serious consideration. It probably only has 2,830 pieces, but who cares.
The other day, I taught my children how to play blackjack. They’re 5 and 7, but I think it’s time they learn to split aces and eights. They’re getting pretty good. By Friday, I’ll be converting Nok Hockey into a craps table.
Maybe you’re already developing new skills. Maybe the only thing left at the supermarket was bananas and Cornish game hens, so you’ve taught yourself how to make Cornish game hen a la banana. You’re whittling small boats and animals. You’re singing out the windows, like our fellow humans overseas.
We’ll be without the big sports we love for a while. That’s obvious. On Sunday night, the CDC advised against public gatherings of more than 50 people for the next eight weeks. That pretty much rules out sporting events for two months. I know everyone wants me to make a Miami Marlins joke, but come on, let’s
be fair. The Marlins draw at least double that.
It’s the Great Sports Shut Down of 2020. Now it’s becoming the Everything Shut Down 2020. I’m thinking of the athletes, sure, but I’m also thinking of the line cooks, dishwashers, bartenders, movie ushers, fitness instructors, cashiers— anyone in a workplace that’s closing up indefinitely.
(You know the thing about playing blackjack with children is, they’re a little reckless. The 5-year-old hit on 18 the other day. And got 21. I don’t know what the lesson is here.) These are the smallest of problems. The other day a friend asked: So what are you going to do now?
He asked me this worried, like I owned a store that sold only Betamaxes and Zunes. I shrugged it off: Oh, there’s lots of stuff to do. Even when there’s no sports, there’s always something.
You’ll hear a lot about the NFL this week. Football’s offseason continues apace, with upcoming free agency and the “Where’s Tom Brady Going?” circus. Part of me thinks this will be a welcome distraction— you don’t have to gather large crowds to tackle free agency. Another part of me thinks it’s tacky. The NFL is charging ahead, business as usual, when, right now in America, it’s anything but business as usual. Worrying about Tom Brady’s next stop feels tonally off. I bet Tom Brady agrees.
Elsewhere, there’s very little action. I got an excited text Sunday: THERE’S BASS FISHING ON, and I got excited, too. My son was racing his Hot Wheels cars, and I’m really wondering who’s going to win. The cat sprints down the hallway, and I want to time him. The kids are going to become so good at Nerf basketball, they’re both getting college scholarships to play Nerf basketball.
We’re going to really feel an absence this week, come Thursday and Friday. In a normal year, March Madness would be on the verge of starting. In a normal year, you’d be going to work and pretending to work. I’d give anything to watch the great Sabrina Ionescu play right now. I’d give anything to yell at Duke.
Ok, that’s not true. I can hang in there without March Madness. What’s happening right now, all
JULIO CORTEZ/ASSOCIATED PRESS An empty practice field is seen at the spring-training facility of the Washington Nationals in West Palm Beach, Fla. The MLB season is on hold.
this shutting down, it’s important. It’s essential, the experts tell us. We’re all part of something larger. If you think about it that way, it’s inspiring. We’re in this together.
Let’s look out for each other. Check in. Pick up the phone, don’t just text. Stay informed, but don’t make yourself batty with social media. Move around. Exercise. Ten sit-ups never hurt anybody. Benchpress the dog. My son actually turned 7 on Sunday. It was the smallest and best kid’s birthday party you ever saw. A homemade cake, a ”handwritten” sign, a promise for a big birthday wahoo with all of his friends when this eventually passes.
I’ve been thinking of how my children will describe these days, decades from now, to their own children and grandchildren. Hopefully, it will be a blip that they’ll barely remember. Maybe they’ll recall it vividly—the time when sports stopped, schools closed, families stayed home and harried modern life abruptly slowed down.
But probably, they’ll just remember the blackjack, and cleaning out Dad for everything he’s got.
Stay well, everybody.
Copyright (c)2020 Dow Jones & Company, Inc. All Rights Reserved. 3/17/2020
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