The spanking poll

[soul_warrior]

A few spankings at the appropriate time are the best thing you will ever do for your kids. Even more important is to be consistent. Nothing confuses a child more than a "parent" who lets their emotions rule how they raise their kids. ANd THAT is the most harmful thing a parent can do. Saying that spanking is bad is absurd, when the real harm is done by inconsistent, indulgent parents who spoil and ruin their kids because the parents are too immature to raise a puppy, much less a child.

QFT.
personally, i've had my share of slaps, spanks and the odd belt.
not nice, but if nothing, it builds character
when (if) i had some brats, i think ill give the belt a well deserved rest.

 

[Mise]

A more general thought.

Is spanking a good way of teaching spelling? For example, if a child spells a word incorrectly, and the child is spanked, do you think that this will help correct his spelling?

 

[emzie]

A more general thought.

Is spanking a good way of teaching spelling? For example, if a child spells a word incorrectly, and the child is spanked, do you think that this will help correct his spelling?

Learning spelling and learning acceptable behaviour are two different things.

By spanking your kid, you're not teaching them along the lines of 1+1=2 but along social dynamic lines. In theory anyway.

 

[Mise]

Learning spelling and learning acceptable behaviour are two different things.

By spanking your kid, you're not teaching them along the lines of 1+1=2 but along social dynamic lines. In theory anyway.

But if the aim is to exert control and dominance over the child, why only do it when the child performs an action or behaviour that is unacceptable to you? Drill sergeants, for example, display dominant behaviour all the time, and punish recruits when they step out of line.

But you guys are saying that spanking isn't a punishment - instead, it's a way of exerting dominance. So why only use it when the child has done something wrong????

 

[emzie]

But if the aim is to exert control and dominance over the child, why only do it when the child performs an action or behaviour that is unacceptable to you? Drill sergeants, for example, display dominant behaviour all the time, and punish recruits when they step out of line.

But you guys are saying that spanking isn't a punishment - instead, it's a way of exerting dominance. So why only use it when the child has done something wrong????

If you were spanked for misspelling something, being spanked would have no meaning and would only instill fear of adults into a kid.

Being spanked is kinda the last resort that is rare enough that the kid pays attention to it.

 

[Mise]

So is it being used to correct behaviour, or is it being used to exert control?

 

[emzie]

So is it being used to correct behaviour, or is it being used to exert control?

Are the two options you gave mutually exclusive?

 

[Mise]

Are the two options you gave mutually exclusive?

If it is being used to correct behaviour, then it should be used whenever there is a behaviour or action that needs correcting.

If it is being used to exert dominance, then it should be used at any time when the parent feels that dominance should be exerted, which in theory could be at any time (e.g. a drill sergeant), or at no time (e.g. a teacher).

So no, I am not saying that they are mutually exclusive.

Perhaps it would be more instructive if you gave me examples of when you would spank a child, and when you wouldn't, to see which of these two categories spanking falls into.

 

[soul_warrior]

spanking should be used to educate, physical pain being the quickest way to learn to NOT do something.

regarding "control" - it is used to set boundaries, teach social dynamics, etc. over do it, and your "control" breeds a serial killer, just waiting to happen.
as every human needs to establish his place in the pecking order, but he also needs to be kept safe.
no pain, no gain, kind of thing.

"correcting behaviour"?
it teaches the child that every action has a counter action
he can still choose to disobey his superiors, but will pay the price.
so, yes.
it does "correct" behaviour, but i prfer to think of it as "setting him up to social standards"
but that is also accomplished by the entire "growing up, living, generic life experience" thing.
spanking will have an effect, but not that much.

 

[rhawn]

Spanking your kids makes good liars out of them.

 

[soul_warrior]

Perhaps it would be more instructive if you gave me examples of when you would spank a child, and when you wouldn't, to see which of these two categories spanking falls into.

spanking reasons:
1- endangering himself. running onto a road, fingers in the electric socket, handling knives.... - where quick, abrupt lessons are needed.
2- endangering others.
3- deliberate harm done to property, ESPECIALLY after he was WARNED beforehand. where REPEAT lessons dont seem to work.
this is a heavy weight gun, not to be used lightly.

not spanking reasons.
1- spilling his milk on the floor, leaving a mess.
2- yelling and tantrums. i think the "silent" treatment works MUCH better.

spanking is to be used to:
1- teach safety (himself and other) - do this, THIS will follow
2- punishment for repeat offenders/offenses
3- establish the pecking order. me (parent) is top dog and YOU WILL OBEY. again, only as a last resort...

 

[T.A JONES]

I like spanking girls over 18 not related to me if they are wearing leather to pleather black pants. SOme reason this garmet holds a considerable amount of power over me. Any colour will do but black proves the most potent . Even as far as becoming a threat to my relationship's honesty or to my monies going all gone! - insert hooker accusation here - but no, I mean take her to the casino on blackjack date. Its the best place togo late after the bar. best place to go period because those uncomfy 'get to know them times' are less akward with all the sounds and colour, eh the money changing distraction
warning to readers!: this post ain't gettin any better or ontopic !

So.....With my chips put in between us I say 'anything on top of this we share as your my goodluckcharm' or something... and that makes it easy to make the magic happen. When I let her think we re a team chemistys in motion. We share moments of under the table intamacy. Best is when blackjack is called I deal a lil 'black smack' myslef if ya know wadda I mean! a I mean, shes happy with the whole sceane. I'll double down on that being the truth!
A fat stack of chips split gets us to her apart-pit. Its better then my car or my bed n breakfast/ worker housing way out far ( guys dorm house not best place anywho ) ... Ya all because of the pants.. and a bit of face..

SO what was I sa...right, Anyone else get this? I think Big Corps do. I notice every girl from Brit to rianna or whatever hot girl of the hour is told to wear them. Makes them look spankable


I mean jeans or dresses , skirts not the same.. I think its the sound on impact that they make upon firm-ass connection, or mybe the shinnyess from close range and the sound and feel upon smackdown all in the same ?
. . Does that mean I have problem? . Sometimes in a bar I will approach the one wearing the leather skin tight chaps even if a hotter girl has eyes for me buts wearing jeans . Ive got usualy some kinda buzz on in that situation so facter that for what its worth.

I will get this checked out by a shrink. I don't like girls comanding or anything like that during sex. Also I feel lame doin the same on them, cept once a girl with no leathers kept whispering 'I like to be a bad girl' so I think : 'nah, no spank for you' I sezs what felt right . 'see the fly? now undo!'
Ya its true lol lame but true! ... Ok the whole speel sounds dumb to . ah well, well piss off then

what a awesom early morning ramblin. hmm some might beg to differ, ya

 

[Defiant47]

A more general thought.

Is spanking a good way of teaching spelling? For example, if a child spells a word incorrectly, and the child is spanked, do you think that this will help correct his spelling?

No, as he is probably trying his best. He shouldn't be spanked for trying his best and failing. He should be spanked for deliberately disobeying something very important, and at a too unmature age to care about vocal punishment (or any other).

 

[philippe]

I'm with soul warrior and dubai vol here.
But i do think there should be an agency that spanks stupid/neglecting/abusive parents.

 

[Rik Meleet]

I don't think spanking is abusive. I do think there are always better parenting-tools than spanking.

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

Spanking your kids makes good liars out of them.

To be honest, I'd be dissapointed in my teenage kids if they didn't lie to me every now and then, though I'd respect them more for being so good at sneaking that they were never in the position to be challenged about it and then lie to me in the first place.

 

[scy12]

I think whether one believes violence is an effective method in some cases , he must attempt to communicate with his kid in ways to teach him to behave better without violence. As more time passes on and as the child becomes older violence should become less and less necessary and efficient compared to other methods. What i wish is that one uses other methods always but i am not a Parent yet. Not making an effort to teach your child to behave better , to see the wrong in his ways by communicating with him without violence is abuse in my opinion. The parent has a duty to get better as a person with the duty to communicate with his kid and to show him the wrong of his ways.

 

[Azale]

So you agree that they are learning that hitting children is a good way of exerting control over them? How do you think this affects their relationship with other children? Do you think that this attitude is carried with them into adulthood? Do you think that, on average, people who are in favour of spanking have a more hawkish attitude on foreign policy, and a more hardnosed attitude on domestic policy?

Are you serious?

 

[Mise]

No, as he is probably trying his best. He shouldn't be spanked for trying his best and failing. He should be spanked for deliberately disobeying something very important, and at a too unmature age to care about vocal punishment (or any other).

So you see spanking as a punishment?

Are you serious?

Are you serious???????????????

 

[rhawn]

To be honest, I'd be dissapointed in my teenage kids if they didn't lie to me every now and then, though I'd respect them more for being so good at sneaking that they were never in the position to be challenged about it and then lie to me in the first place.

I wouldn't want my kids to lie to me because they are afraid I'll hit them. I was hit over the smallest infractions. I learned to look my parents in the face and lie because I didn't want to be hit. When I got older and had real problems I was afraid to come to them because of the potential consequences. I think violence breaks some of the bonds of trust that parents and children should have.