"Two cows" jokes, CFC OT style

[WillJ]

You've probably all heard various classic "two cows" jokes. Let's think of "two cows" jokes refering to CFC OT members! (e.g. WillJ has two cows. He...)

I believe the precedent established in a couple other threads is that user-specific threads are okay as long as the users mentioned give consent, so let's not joke about people until they've posted in this thread that they're okay with it. If you're interested, go ahead and say so.

 

[ShiplordAtvar]

You are ShiplordAtvar.

You have two cows. You get together with a local rancher and trade him the two cows in return for a truck that doesn't hemorrhage motor oil.

You each walk away laughing, convinced you've gotten the better end of the deal.

Later on, as your dear klutzy mother is driving the truck, she manages to drive into the pasture where the cows are, kill them, and total the truck in the process. All this leaves you back where you started, except you have a rancher pissed off at you.

 

[Azadre]

Azadre has two cows.
He breds the first two using some knowledge of gentics and now has a million cows. He then gets mad and leaves the cows to roam the city streets.

 

[WillJ]

Silly guys, you're not supposed to do yourself.

 

[Babbler]

WillJ has two cows:

They endless fight over evolution vs. creationism; theisism vs. atheisism; capitalism vs. communism; pro-Americanism vs. anti-Americanism; pro-Europeanism vs. anti-Europeanism, believing that they will have some effect on the world.

Then Giant Death Robots kills them, and the moderator closed the thread.

It should be about the OT, right?

 

[Syterion]

I'm okay with it.

WillJ has two cows. They have offspring. The female offspring are abused by the male cow. Why? Because he lives in Alabama.

 

[Azadre]

Systerion has two cows
He marries the cows because he's from Massachusetts.
They can't breed, and one refuses to milk.

 

[Bacon King]

Seems like a funny idea. I'm not very creative, but if anyone wants to do a 'Bacon King has two cows', I'm ok with it.

 

[SeleucusNicator]

I think the last consent-given thread was actually locked.

We did manage to get a few dozen pages in first before being smacked down, though. Oh, and do whatever you wish with me.

 

[North King]

I ok with someone making fun of me.

You have two cows (insert any major debate member on the below topic in place of you).

One begins to babble about how Communism is the only proper government form. The other starts babbling about "a hand up, not a hand out." They continue to babble back and forth repeating the same slogans, often coming back to the exact same topic in a day, often talking about the exact same topic at the same time in differently phrased versions. The second one finally announces he is leaving OT forever complaining of the "leftist bias of the forums". About twenty minutes later he comes back and starts flaming the communist again, and they are warned by a random moderator who has come out of hiding into no man's land. They quiet down in that area and move to another reiterating the same topics.

You also never get your milk.

Rinse, repeat.

 

[WillJ]

WillJ has two cows:

They endless fight over evolution vs. creationism; theisism vs. atheisism; capitalism vs. communism; pro-Americanism vs. anti-Americanism; pro-Europeanism vs. anti-Europeanism, believing that they will have some effect on the world.

Then Giant Death Robots kills them, and the moderator closed the thread.

It should be about the OT, right?

Not really about the OT in general, though.

@Syterion and Azadre: A-ha, that's what I'm looking for.

Note: Anyone who posts in this thread implicitly agrees to being a "participant" by default, unless he/she states otherwise.

 

[Babbler]

Not really about the OT in general, though.

@Syterion and Azadre: A-ha, that's what I'm looking for.

Note: Anyone who posts in this thread implicitly agrees to being a "participant" by default, unless he/she states otherwise.

Okay:

Babbler has two cows:

They post before they read the thread with the first thing in mind. Thus the have keyboard-in-mouth disease.

 

[Fetus4188]

I throw myself to the mercy of the masses.

 

[ybbor]

Azadre has tow cows. they die. He blames Bush.

I'm creative aren't I?

WillJ has two cows, he puts sunglasses on them

I'm in, interesting to see if i do anything people can put into a cow.

 

[Perfection]

Perfection prefers to call his curvaceous and voluptuous

 

[downtown]

SN has two cows. he orders them to reproduce as quickly as they can, to make cow soliders to attack the EU at a latter date

 

[Babbler]

Perfection has two cows:

They are killed by giant death robots. And he laughs at it.

WillJ has two cows:

They chase him out of town, since he keeps on asking them improbable moral situtions, and what they will do.


You can post some two cow on me.

 

[Syterion]

SN has two cows. He calls the male "The U.S." and the female "The Rest of the World" and laughs each time the U.S. assumes the dominant mounting position on the rest of the world. Then he milks the female dry.

 

[Azadre]

Azadre has tow cows. they die. He blames Bush.

I'm creative aren't I?

WillJ has two cows, he puts sunglasses on them

I'm in, interesting to see if i do anything people can put into a cow.

always blaming bush


(ps - I don't blame Bush for a lot things, it's the GOP I blame them on)

 

[Syterion]

I throw myself to the mercy of the masses.

Fetus has two cows. He bets them on a Cal football game. Now he is thirsty for milk.