I became a smoker in my teens and was thoroughly addicted by my 20s. This was back when smoking was not perceived as being bad for you or the people around you. A lot of people smoked, it was normal. As I got older and the news came out that smoking was killing people I could also feel the detrimental effects in my own body. People started quitting so the cigarette companies started playing with the chemistry to make their product more addictive. I know I was hooked like a fish. Tried multiple times to quit and failed multiple times. Withdrawal changes ones thinking, everything becomes catastrophic. Let me tell you something about smoking. People light up when they are concerned about something or in deep thought. So, if every little thing is blown out of proportion by withdrawal it amplifies the desire to smoke until you do, and then you calm down and the feeling of failure sets in. To me this is why people are in denial, they don't want to think of themselves as weak slaves to their addiction. "I can quit any time." No, you can't.
So, I had to quit apart from the rest of the human race so that nothing could cause me stress. I took time off from doing construction, stayed at home and got the place cleaned up beforehand. Stocked up on aspirin and Tylenol which cut the signals to the brain of every cell in your body freaking out and vitamin C to sooth things. Btw you first have to cut out coffee completely. One cup during this process and its over.
So I went through 2 weeks of hell with days 2-8 being the worst, but I finally quit, do or die. For 5 years. Then I got back with a smoking ex gf and out at a bar had "just one". Maybe 4 years later I quit once more and never made that mistake again. This time around I was helped by the flu which really got into my lungs and for 4 days it was impossible for me to smoke. With 4 days in I stuck with it, do or die. So it is to this day, I'm a recovered smoker. I like to be downwind of someone smoking because to me it smells great. If you are a smoker the things stop tasting good. They do something to the ability to taste and smell. Food doesn't taste like it used to. When you quit these senses revive and cigarettes smell great. They will continue to smell great for me because I'll never smoke again.
I was never delusional, I knew what I was doing and what I had to do. Do or die...