Ask A Girl IV: Boundless Questions

[Hakim]

Two ladders?

 

[Boundless]

Why do you subject yourself to these insipid questions?

Would you say this is one?
It's the perfect procrastination tool (and occasionally quite interesting)!

Would you say being the owner of a lonely heart is much better than being the owner of a broken heart?

I'd say yes, but the only time I've ever been the owner of a lonely heart was when I was the owner of a broken heart too - I think the two go hand-in-hand.

Do you like bacon?

Who DOESN'T like bacon? I love it! In fact I'm having it with my dinner in a risotto!

Why do women, despite a centuries worth of advancement of women's rights to attain sexual equality, expect men to pay for the whole date?
Shouldn't women, regardless of whether it is the 1st, 10th or 100th date (with the exception of a birthday or a celebration of her of some sort) be expected to pay their full and equal share of the meal?

Similarly. Why is it alright for women to slap men but it is suddenly spousal abuse if a man slaps a woman?

As I said in a previous thread, I don't expect men to pay for the whole date. However, for women who do, I don't think it's to do with sexual equality, I think it's simply a tradition we'd prefer to keep that way because it's in our favour to
As for slapping men, I don't think it's alright to do so, either way. Slapping anyone, of the same sex or opposite sex isn't justified (most of the time )

I'll repeat my question because it was never answered by the relevant people. It is an empirical fact that there are few women in the intellectually challenging careers of STEM (natural science/technology/engineering/math). Why do you think this is the case?

I can't honestly say I can answer it due to lack of knowledge. But on a very basic assumption, because women have only been able to get into that field properly in the last 50 years or so, maybe even less, so ultimately we're still catching up? Plus, as someone suggested above, I do think it has something to do with school stigma that girls should take arty subjects and boys science ones - hence why girls are proven to do better in single sex education.

How does it feel to have a popular thread?

It'll feel better when I have two popular threads

Do you wield your femininity as a weapon?

Are you familiar with the problem that has no name?

When I need to, yes. Like the other day I went into mac because my charger had broken, was nice to the manager and he gave me a new one for free instead of paying a ridiculous £50-something!

As for the problem that has no name, no, I am not, care to elaborate?

There's no real reason to be lonely. Just be yourself & give your free will a chance.

@ Boundless: If you were to put a man and woman together in order to see which one is smarter, which one would you say? Some would say men, but I would say ‘no.’ I believe that the women have obviously got control of the men like a puppet show.

Firstly I agree with the above about no real reason to be lonely. I think there's a thread about whether it's necessary to have friends - yes, it damn well is.
I really honestly don't know, although every year girls do better in public exams (GCSEs and A-Levels) than boys, but that could be down to girls being more naturally hard-working than boys. I'd like to say my female friends are more intelligent than my male ones, but honestly I don't think they are. Although it's again, hard for me to judge because I'm at university - and no one is a complete idiot if they've managed to get there. (well, I say that, but I'm pretty sure you can do a degree in 'The Wire'. COME ON).

 

[Abaddon]

Why is female prostitution so much more common than male?

 

[Boundless]

Why is female prostitution so much more common than male?

Good question! With female prostitution, the woman has control whether or not men have sex because quite literally a woman can have sex regardless of whether she's turned on or not. By a man paying a woman to have sex with him, the woman is saying 'yes you can have sex with me' and letting him do what he wants to her. When a woman pays for sex with a man, the man is doing it because he is being paid to, not because he's turned on. I haven't explained myself very well there but do you get what I mean? I suppose it's difficult because it's like that argument of 'how can a woman rape a man?' and some people arguing that you can't. This makes little sense. Anyway...
I do also think the cultural stigma of a man being dominant over a woman. A male prostitute is under the control of the woman's money and that's problematic. Traditionally, women are in a subordinate position in a patriarchal society. There's a sense of misogyny which lies with prostitution I think and that's hard to translate into a male prostitute. Having also just read up on this (albeit very briefly) on the internet, I've noticed that a lot of articles are suggesting that there was definitely a merging between the aristocratic world and the subculture, so it's definitely about your place in society - women, until very recently have been viewed as secondary to males - so I think that's why the stigma is so important for why female prostitution is more common.
And in it's most basic sense - men want sex more? Which I agree doesn't follow at all, but some idiots are arguing this over tinternet.

Edit: Interesting question, why do you ask?

 

[Cheetah]

If I may...

Good question! With female prostitution, the woman has control whether or not men have sex because quite literally a woman can have sex regardless of whether she's turned on or not. By a man paying a woman to have sex with him, the woman is saying 'yes you can have sex with me' and letting him do what he wants to her. When a woman pays for sex with a man, the man is doing it because he is being paid to, not because he's turned on. I haven't explained myself very well there but do you get what I mean? I suppose it's difficult because it's like that argument of 'how can a woman rape a man?' and some people arguing that you can't. This makes little sense. Anyway...

It's rather easy to turn a man on, and since there actually exists such a thing as male prostitution, I'd argue that there is no biological limitation to male prostitution.

I do also think the cultural stigma of a man being dominant over a woman. A male prostitute is under the control of the woman's money and that's problematic. Traditionally, women are in a subordinate position in a patriarchal society. There's a sense of misogyny which lies with prostitution I think and that's hard to translate into a male prostitute. Having also just read up on this (albeit very briefly) on the internet, I've noticed that a lot of articles are suggesting that there was definitely a merging between the aristocratic world and the subculture, so it's definitely about your place in society - women, until very recently have been viewed as secondary to males - so I think that's why the stigma is so important for why female prostitution is more common.

I'm pretty sure misogyny has nothing to do with this. Men want sex, and if paying is what is required to get it, then some men will be willing to pay what some women will be willing to have sex for. Everything else around this simple transaction may of course be more complex though.

And in it's most basic sense - men want sex more? Which I agree doesn't follow at all, but some idiots are arguing this over tinternet.

To be more precise then:
Men want lots of sex, and aren't very picky about which woman they have sex with. Women may want just as much sex (honestly, I kinda doubt this - testosterone is a powerful thing), but women are way more picky than guys when it comes to who they will have sex with. Thus, the market for male prostitutes is rather limited - and mostly caters to other men.

 

[Boundless]

If I may...It's rather easy to turn a man on, and since there actually exists such a thing as male prostitution, I'd argue that there is no biological limitation to male prostitution.
I'm pretty sure misogyny has nothing to do with this. Men want sex, and if paying is what is required to get it, then some men will be willing to pay what some women will be willing to have sex for. Everything else around this simple transaction may of course be more complex though.
To be more precise then:
Men want lots of sex, and aren't very picky about which woman they have sex with. Women may want just as much sex (honestly, I kinda doubt this - testosterone is a powerful thing), but women are way more picky than guys when it comes to who they will have sex with. Thus, the market for male prostitutes is rather limited - and mostly caters to other men.

I don't think it's as simple as that, but fair enough, I see what you're saying.
I think NOW it's less about misogyny but the question is why is it more common, and ultimately I think it will always be more common because of attitudes in the past. Just like the argument about why women are less involved in technology/maths/science jobs, it's the past catching up with modern-day attitudes, which aren't misogynistic.
I don't think there is a biological limitation to male prostitution either, but I'm sure that because there is a question around that it means it is less common!

 

[Xanikk999]

What is the best way to impress a girl and make her think you are hot stuff? I can never convince women to like me that way...

 

[SuperJay]

Gonna go with Nato's advice here and start with "unsubscribe from World of Warcraft."

 

[Bill3000]

What is the best way to impress a girl and make her think you are hot stuff? I can never convince women to like me that way...

washing your face and getting a haircut once in a while might be a good start

Moderator Action: Trolling.
Please read the forum rules: http://forums.civfanatics.com/showthread.php?t=422889

 

[Xanikk999]

washing your face and getting a haircut once in a while might be a good start

I just got a haircut last week. You know I haven't updated my picture in my profile in ages?

 

[Xanikk999]

Gonna go with Nato's advice here and start with "unsubscribe from World of Warcraft."

How would they know I played that from talking to me in person? Besides, I know women who play the game.

 

[nato2101]

How would they know I played that from talking to me in person? Besides, I know women who play the game.

You waste time on WoW which could be spent on meeting women. its to do with opportunity cost

 

[SuperJay]

How would they know I played that from talking to me in person?

Well, the odor is a dead giveaway, for starters.

Besides, I know women who play the game.

So did I. And nearly every woman I met playing WoW was one of the following:

(A) Psychologically unstable.
(B) A tween.
(C) Normal, well-adjusted, and married.
(D) Normal, well-adjusted, and a grandmother.

Take your pick!

 

[Bill3000]

edit: ignore me i hideously misread the definition of "tween"

 

[nato2101]

(A) Psychologically unstable.

Don't knock it, they can be fun.

 

[Boundless]

Gonna go with Nato's advice here and start with "unsubscribe from World of Warcraft."

Or just keep shtum about it, and play it in the dark of the night when she's asleep... my ex did that and it took me 3 months to even find out, and then it was just amusing and something to mock

 

[downtown]

My mom actually has a Wow Subscription. Her job required her to get it for a while, but I think she still sneaks off and plays sometimes.

 

[SuperJay]

Don't knock it, they can be fun.

Indeed they can be! At least for a time, provided you've taken steps to shield yourself from the inevitable drama explosion that concludes such relationships

EDIT: Xanikk, I should be clear that I'm just having fun with this question; I hope no offense taken on your end. To be serious: You can't really say anything to make a girl think you're hot stuff. Either you believe you're hot stuff and it's just apparent via your confident demeanor, or you don't think you're hot stuff and she's all too aware that you're trying to make her believe something that you don't believe yourself.

To add to the cliche - you gotta be yourself, but you have to like yourself. If you're happy and comfortable with who you are, she'll likely find that confidence attractive. And then you can spring that WoW habit on her and she may not even bat an eye.

 

[Cheetah]

I don't think it's as simple as that, but fair enough, I see what you're saying.
I think NOW it's less about misogyny but the question is why is it more common, and ultimately I think it will always be more common because of attitudes in the past. Just like the argument about why women are less involved in technology/maths/science jobs, it's the past catching up with modern-day attitudes, which aren't misogynistic.

You are aware that in many developing countries - countries were traditional attitudes sit stronger than in developed countries - the ratio of women to men who studies technology/maths/science is actually higher than in many developed countries?

I don't think there is a biological limitation to male prostitution either, but I'm sure that because there is a question around that it means it is less common!

There might be a question around it when it comes to rape - as rape is a situation where common sense would suggest that one does not get sexually aroused (Yes, I know this is actually wrong) and therefore one can't rape a man. However, male prostitution still involves a voluntary seller, thus there is less reason to assume he could not get sexually aroused.

I still stand by the explanation that women are far more picky than men, and thus the concept of prostitution isn't as intriguing to women as it is to men.

What is the best way to impress a girl and make her think you are hot stuff? I can never convince women to like me that way...

Short answer:
0. Actually get in contact and interact with her!

1. Interact with her so as to connect emotionally - use humour and hold entertaining conversations, never stay too long on more logical (i.e. emotionally boring) topics like politics (pros and cons of flat tax rate), technology (how RAM works), your latest scientific paper, etc.

1b. Also avoid emotionally interesting, but controversial topics like gun control, abortion, etc. Even if you agree with her position, that is not the thoughts she should connect to you.

1c. You want to keep the conversation light, jokingly and inconsequential - like if you were bantering with your 5-year old sibling.

2. Display "higher value" by actually being interesting yourself (If you don't have an interesting life, go to google, look up the nearest place to learn rock-climbing or driving go-karts, and get going!). Displaying "higher value" does absolutely not include buying her anything you wouldn't have bought a guy friend, doing her favours you wouldn't have done for a guy friend, nor paying for her half of the meal if you wouldn't also have done that for a guy friend. If you're not an acquaintance/more-or-less friend of a girl, if you wouldn't have done those things for a guy you just met, do not do it for the girl either.

3. Act as if she is one of many girls you are interacting with - yes you can fake, but preferably this should actually be true. If for some reason, the conversation should end, then let it end. Preferably end it yourself. When you feel like it, end the interaction. When you feel like it, do what you want to do. When you feel like it, talk to any other girl or guy you care to talk to. Do not follow her around just because you had a conversation five minutes ago!

4. Have a life. Have your own interests and things you do. School, work, sports, hobbies, it doesn't matter (not completely true - WoW, Civ, et al. does not count!), but do stuff, and actually care about doing your stuff.

5. As for talking, awkward pauses are not bad. Just remain calm, say something if you like, or otherwise say your going to do something else, and end the conversation. Do not say something just because there is silence!

6. If you've talked to her a few times and she seems to enjoy your company, or your (first?) conversation goes well and you get the feeling she enjoys talking to you, tell her that you're going to do some activity (again: Not WoW, Civ, et al.!), and that she's free to come along if she'd like. Whatever her answer, you still do what you said you were going to do. Note a few more rules though: Going to the movies is bad, because you'll both be quiet and not interact until after the movie is over; doing anything expensive is bad unless both of you share a strong interest in the activity (and remember, you each pay for yourselves!), doing something that screams "couple stuff" is also a no-no, it makes it way too obvious what you are thinking (hinting of it is very important, but making it clear at the very beginning is stupid).

If you're decently dressed, have a decent hygiene, and have decent personal and social skills (you fit these criteria if you don't have any problems getting friends and doing social stuff), then those pointers should get you started.

 

[Angst]

I suppose it's difficult because it's like that argument of 'how can a woman rape a man?' and some people arguing that you can't. This makes little sense. Anyway...

Just jumping in here to answer this: Yes, it's very possible for a woman to rape a man...