Imperium Offtopicum XXIII

[Sonereal]

The beatings will continue until reverence improves.

 

[Sonereal]

[REDACTED PENDING REQUEST]

 

[Thorvald of Lym]

Emperor Adonis has been fascinated by Jason, but this fascination is unfortunately borne out of jealously. Jason is beloved by his subjects, who should be loving him! Not anyone else! If Jason confirms his Godhood, Emperor Adonis’ jealously will likely boil over into pure rage. If Jason denies Godhood, Emperor Adonis will likely be less angry but still intensely jealous.

This seems strangely familiar...

 

[Marcher Jovian]

The United Caribbean demands that the Kingdom of the Masked God recognize the independence of the Mexican Neo-Apostolic State.

 

[NinjaCow64]

The United Caribbean demands that the Kingdom of the Masked God recognize the independence of the Mexican Neo-Apostolic State.

From: The Masked God

I refuse.

 

[Sonereal]

From: The Personal Altar of the Orb Mother
To: The Masked God

Terrible violence has struck out border with sound and fury. This war is a perfect example of what happens with a misunderstanding is allow to metastasize.

Our lovely forces have no quarrel with believers of the Masked God. Our forces are withdrawing from occupying positions in Mexico.

Southward.

Toward the Christians of the foul Mexican Neo-Apolostolic State.

Together, we shall drown the Christians in nuclear fire and the holy blood of the new martyrs of humanity.

From: The People's Temple
To: The remaining Christians of Mexico

Instrumentality is within reach.

 

[NinjaCow64]

The Masked God confirms peace with the People’s Temple, as well pledging full military cooperation with the People’s Temple to purge the traitors in Yucatán.

 

[NinjaCow64]

New Index of Economic Freedom Overview 2202

The New Index of Economic Freedom is a yearly publication published by the New Heritage Foundation in Argentina, measuring the economic freedom of each country. Founded in 2200, it measures economic freedom based on a wide variety of criteria. The New Heritage Foundation has been criticised for merely being a measurement of how influence the Global Eloi have over the country[neutrality disputed].

FIVE STARS

Five stars are given to nations that have excellent economic freedom and are exemplars for the world to follow.

• Asian Tetrarchy
• Argentine Republic
• Republic of the Philippines
• United African States

Explanation: The Asian Tetrarchy and Argentine Republic continue to be the world’s economic powerhouses, providing fair economic opportunity to all of its citizens. The Republic of the Philippines has been upgraded from four to five stars this year due to its close relations with the Asian Tetrarchy providing new economic opportunities for their citizens. The United African States has cemented its position in the five star category though the opening of the United African Trade Office, providing new economic opportunities to all of its citizens as part of its goal to refurbish the Star of Coruscant.

FOUR STARS

Four stars are given to nations that have high levels of economic freedoms, but have some burdensome government regulations or some other problem that prevents the nation from breaking into the five stars category.

• Greater German Republic
• Indonesian Confederation
• Oceanic Combine
• Scandinavian Federation
• Union of Rome

Explanation: The Oceanic Combine has high levels of economic freedom, with a thriving free market that provides economic opportunities to all citizens. However, the government takes a heavy-handed approach to economic intervention, compromising their free market. Corporations that are favoured by Director Marcus Zeimer are given an unfair advantage over corporations that are less favoured, often this process is not based in economic fact but is instead based around who can best appeal to Zeimer’s concerning ideology. The New Heritage Foundation encourages the Oceanic Combine to reconsider the amount that the government interferes in the workings of the free market in order to better uplift the citizens of their nation.

The Greater German Republic, the Indonesian Confederation, the Scandinavian Federation and the Union of Rome are guiding lights of economic freedom, with the tried and tested Liberal Democratic government ensuring that economic activity occurs unfettered. However, the Scandinavian Federation and the Indonesian Confederation are subject to internal instability that is unfortunately impacting the economic freedom in said countries. Even more unfortunately, Germany and Rome oversee unwieldy tax regimes that unnecessarily impact free commerce within their countries. The New Heritage Foundation does commend both nations for their military actions that aim to bring economic freedom and prosperity to places where it is sorely needed.

THREE STARS

Nations given three stars have major impediments to the economic freedom of their populace, but have potential to liberalise their economy and restore their prosperity and freedom.

• Byzantine Empire
• Christian Republic of Ethiopia
• Empire of the Great Suan (Da Suan)
• The Federal Republic of the Caribbean
• Federation of the Northeastern Republics
• New Gaian Collective
• Nusantara
  
• Oceanic Trade Confederation
• Photosynthetic Order of the Oaken Boughs
• Provisional Kingdom of Siam
• Republic of Norlisk

Explanation: Three stars are often held by nations that we hope are on the trend of liberalisation and those we fear are becoming prey to dangerous ideologies. Of those nations we hope that are liberalising include the New Gaian Collective, who have recently encouraged tourism into their borders, earning them an upgrade from two stars. This may provide an important dose of freedom to their collectivised economy and allow their citizens to more freely interact with the global economy. Another nation that appears hopeful is the Federal Republic of the Caribbean, whose cooperation with the Argentine Republic to contain the dangerous People’s Temple and the Kingdom of the Masked God may be a promising sign of upcoming liberalisation. We have also heard promising reports of planned economic reform in Nusantara, which could lead to increased economic liberation in that region.

Nations we are particularly concerned about are the Christian Republic of Ethiopia, who recently spurned economic liberalisation in favour of an incredibly and ideologically driven restrictive tax regime. Even more concerning is the Byzantine Empire, whose Senate has approved heavy-handed economic interference in the economy and rejected the sound economic advice of Emperor Adonis. We worry that next year we may have to dock an entire star from the nation. We also watch the Provisional Kingdom of Siam with great worry, as Princess Sasithorn will likely be coronated and she is a believer in the extremist Neo-Buddhist ideology. We hope promised liberal reforms in the Kingdom will be a moderating influence on this factor. We are also concerned that recent instability in the Federation of the Northeastern Republics could lead to a loss of economic freedom for the people in the region.

TWO STARS

Nations given two stars are either economically isolated or are bound to incredibly restrictive command economies that limit the economic freedom of the populace.

• The Caliphate (Arabia)
• The Caliphate (Persia)
• Holy Kingdom of Iberia
• Katsuyoshi Shogunate
• New Bharat
• Nullaktuk Realm
• United Commonwealth of England, Scotland, Wales, and Ireland (Second English Protectorate)

Explanation: New Bharat has been awarded an extra star due to the efforts of Colonel Rajkumar Singh. Hailing from the moderate faction of the Neo-Buddhists, he has overseen liberalisation of the economy to facilitate a thriving black market that the government largely does not attempt to stymie. While this is far from ideal, it represents a marked improvement from the previous state of affairs. The Katsuyoshi Shogunate has seen a marked economic improvement due to scientific breakthroughs and trade with Da Suan, however most of this wealth has flown to the top through a corrupt and inefficient command economy. We urge Shogun Katsuyoshi Satoshi to end the command economy so that his people can more freely enjoy the economic benefits that international trade has brought.

ONE STAR

Nations that have been captured by dangerous extremist left-wing ideologies such as Communism and Fascism that eliminate all chance of economic freedom within the country and actively sabotage the economic freedom of other nations.

• Hartland Sovereignty
• Kingdom of the Masked God
• Liberated Appalachian Autonomous Territories
• Lilin Syndicate
• The People’s Temple
• People’s Union of Scandinavia
• United Soviet Socialist Republics

Explanation: With lack of economic freedom comes human rights abuses, which are used to crush the dreams of the people who yearn for economic liberation. One needs to look no further than the way that the nations on this list treat Neo-Apostles and pro-democracy activists. No nation could encapsulate this better than the horrific and dystopian People’s Temple. These nations are also prone to great instability, such as in the Kingdom of the Masked God and the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics. Economic illiberalism is not only immoral, it is unsustainable. We can only hope that international pressure will cause the liberation of the people’s of these nations, who can once again join in free participation in the world’s markets.

 

[Double A]

The Eloi Are Literally Worse Than PDMA Foundation publishes the exact same list yearly as the Pound Me Harder Daddy Index.

 

[Belgarion95]

I'll join as Argentina.

 

[Shadowbound]

The Eloi Are Literally Worse Than PDMA Foundation publishes the exact same list yearly as the Pound Me Harder Daddy Index.

Spoiler Pound Me Harder Daddy Index :

FIVE STARS

1. New Bharat
2. Da Suan
3. Nullaktuk Realm
4. Greater German Republic

Leading the rankings are a bevy of nations with Force 2, topped by New Bharat because of Colonel Singh's moustache. All of these nations have strong, authoritarian figures with the muscle to back up their intent, but their intent is ultimately to build a better life for us all which is what we want in a daddy.

FOUR STARS

5. Byzantine Empire
6. People's Temple
7. Oceanic Combine
8. United Commonwealth of England

These nations have high force rankings, but lack the personality that makes them a true daddy. The Byzantine Empire and United Commonwealth are little more than ethnic stereotypes, while the People's Temple scares us in an unsexy way. The Oceanic Combine, despite a lower force ranking, appears here because of big daddy Zeimer.

THREE STARS OR LESS

Who cares? We only want real daddies: if you don't have a Force Rating of 2 you're not strong enough to protect us. New Kalimantan, despite that, gets bumped down here because it apparently is ruled by a priestess or something, which is very undaddy.

 

[jackelgull]

Colonel Singh and his sexy mustache

 

[NinjaCow64]

Alright, sent out some more secret correspondence that I couldn't send earlier because reasons.

I'm going to set an orders lock now. I'm feeling two weeks, lets go with 14th of February.

 

[NinjaCow64]

SouthernKing has dropped New Kalimantan, which is now an NPC. New players please feel free to take over this nation.

 

[NinjaCow64]

From: New Kalimantan
To: Nusantara @christos200

The Priestess has decreed that war between our two nations is no longer desirable. She has given permission for our diplomats to sign a white peace on her behalf, as no major military engagements have yet occurred between our two nations.

 

[NinjaCow64]

I’m extending orders lock to the 16th of February as that’s more convenient to me.

 

[NinjaCow64]

48 hours until orders lock. I will start sending out reminder PMs later.

 

[NinjaCow64]

KaiserElectric has dropped from as the player of the Provisional Authority of Siam. In related news, I will be delaying orders lock while I attempt to find a replacement.

 

[Marcher Jovian]

The United Caribbean will intervene to defend the Yucatan.

 

[NinjaCow64]

From: The Masked God
To: The United Caribbean

Useless. Useless. Useless. Useless.