Roll to Dodge: Ludicrous Edition
- Thread starter Thorvald of Lym
- Start date
Omega124
Challenging Fate
I show them who is the real Top Gun
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I launch the Ultimate Spaceship with all I have left.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
Since there's no huts or accommodations around, I set up camp to recuperate.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
11 (14): You manage to bloody a good half-dozen. Another half-dozen sneak up from behind.Ailedhoo said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
2 (5): Using improvised clubs and et cetera, they beat 15 hitpoints out of you and inflict ongoing 3 damage from blood loss.
16 (17): Getting out of your cockpit, you proceed to school the hostile pilots in beach volleyball. Invigorated by the superiority of the Socialist system, your followers in Albany rally New York State to the Namibian cause, however hard it is to see on the map.Omega124 said:
5 (7): He dodges at the last second and you end up checking the ground for 8 damage. Meanwhile, George takes aim.CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
5 (7): The bullets scuff and dent your outer armour for 10 damage. Chiang struggles to free himself from you.
ROLL TO DODGE!
20 (20): You instinctively lift your arm skyward, forcing him to pull himself up by his own weight. Unable to keep the grip, he ends up thudding against you multiple times, speeding the assimilation. Chiang suffers 26 damage, and you absorb his radiation immunity!
19: Dumping literally every physical object on your person into the assembly, you captain the USS Space Oddity into low-Earth orbit. You've more than won over National Defense, which offers a tidy bonus of $45,000 once you've unfrozen your assets. You also gain several combat bonuses from commanding the ship, provided your opponents aren't onboard.JohannaK said:
19 (17): Getting the first decent rest in you don't even know how long, you recover from this insane adventure, losing all negative modifiers and gaining 30 hitpoints.CivGeneral said:
Having finally rallied after the previous debacle, the EKNC launches a fresh offensive against Chinese lines.
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (15): The Monarchist hordes swarm into northern China. Forced to abandon its primary defensive emplacements, the People's Republic of China loses 1 defence!
CubeCannon swaps hendo and the Lesser Hentaibeast!
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
Launch orbital bombardment of the EKNC leadership HQ from the DBS (David Bowie Ship) Space Oddity.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
I demand thor uses a different color for nambia. Like Lucina blue :3
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
I find an untended tank in a barn.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
15 (19): Caving in a few skulls, you send the survivors into a rout. The prisoners probably won't be bothering you again.Ailedhoo said:
20 (20): Triangulating radio signals, you identify the Monarchists' new base of operations and commence an immediate alpha strike. Scattering the general staff again, all EKNC attacks will suffer a -5 penalty for the next eight turns, and you're pretty sure future boss fights will be a little easier.JohannaK said:
20 (20): Putting their heads together, you inflict 20 damage to Chiang and 23 damage to George, while absorbing 1 point of defence from the battered general. Uh-oh, looks like George is trying to use his Executive Power again!CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
11 (11): You trip him as he tries to flee, keeping him in the fight. Chiang, meanwhile struggles to headshot you.
ROLL TO DODGE!
14 (17): Giving a gentle squeeze (that hurts like hell when you've got robot fingers embedded in his torso), you remind him of his place in the pecking order to the tune of 13 damage.
11: He darkens it a bit so at least now it's legible. c:Omega124 said:
17: Looks like you're luck's finally starting to turn, boi! You uncover a salvaged AMX Leclerc, probably recovered from the NATO intervention in Namibia.CivGeneral said:
The EKNC uses its flanking position to double down on Mongolia.
ROLL TO DODGE!
4 (1): Monarchist tactics are rapidly becoming a paint-by-numbers game. Mongolia is now IMMUNE to invasion for the next ten turns!
CubeCannon swaps the Man-Eating Rabbit and the Libertarian Volunteer Corps!
Last edited:
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I argue to the UN that the EKNC poses a threat that necessarily overrides international law on this point, at least momentarily.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
Two natural 20s in one turn? And one not me? I send investigators to Norway to make sure rolls aren't being fudged
Last edited:
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
Frank and I travel to a nearby city for supplies.
Thorvald of Lym
A Little Sketchy
11 (12): You set out on foot back to Mongolia.Ailedhoo said:
9: The Secretary-General patiently explains that if the international community forsakes the law for temporary expediency, it holds no greater moral standing than the Monarchist terrorists it purports to oppose.JohannaK said:
3: Fearing your pursuit of l33t 5k!llz will lead to a takeover of the United States, terrorists under the employ of Ted Cruz shoot down the passenger jet headed for Oslo. With Trumpmerica thrown into disarray, Cruz decides the time has come to make his move and leads Texas in revolt, undermining American defences by 3 points! The EKNC gains a second front in North America, and another attack per turn!Omega124 said:
2 (8): You're gonna be waiting an awful long time for him to catch up, time enough for the two to tackle you at once!CivCube said:
ROLL TO DODGE!
17 (20): Using Chiang as a shield, you counter George's frenzied attack, inflicting 19 damage to the President and 15 damage to the General, though you suffer 14 yourself from the feedback. On his deathbed, Chiang tries to invoke his Executive Power: Human Wave!
ROLL TO DODGE!
3 (4): You're unable to stop him from summoning hordes of reinforcements! Beginning now and over the next 5 turns, a new division will arrive to attack you! Each has its own individual stats, and will continue to pursue you until defeated. Here comes one now!
ROLL TO DODGE!
9 (15): You manage to hold your ground, inflicting 18 damage to the division.
17: You walk back down the path to the town centre and, using all of Frank's savings, get yourselves some kevlar, combat helmets, and a half-dozen field dressing kits.CivGeneral said:
CivCube completes the assimilation of General Chiang! He claims Chiang's items as spoils of war.
In a complete deviation from its standard pattern, the EKNC sets its sights on Pakistan!
ROLL TO DODGE!
18 (13): The invading armies storm across the northern border, seizing two provinces! Meanwhile, Governor Cruz commits to Texan manifest destiny.
ROLL TO DODGE!
12 (5): Beset by counter-revolutions at home, he fails to advance beyond the border, giving the USA and Mexico time to improve defences.
CubeCannon swaps Hyena Clan and the Rhinoceros!
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I bypass the Secretary General and appeal to the Big Five, unleashing SOL 740 on Ted Cruz to back me up. PS: Ted Cruz has no stats, so fire on President George instead. This is totally a ranged attack.
