What if your boy wants to be a girl?

[Skwink]

I guess it was a mistake to think people would discuss this in any intelligent manner. Overestimated human nature again.

I think you forgot this is the internet.

 

[classical_hero]

I guess it was a mistake to think people would discuss this in any intelligent manner. Overestimated human nature again.

I don't children or teenagers are that responsible enough to make that sort of decision for themselves.

 

[NovaKart]

What decision? I'm not talking about a sex change operation. It's really a very specific question. Some children have a strong identity with the opposite gender and they insist on dressing and acting in that way.

 

[cardgame]

I.. don't even know. I guess I'd cross that bridge when I came to it.

 

[Luckymoose]

I'm going to beat him until I accept it. Or just accept it. Cause it's my kid and anyone who says something will get the fist of fatherly love.

 

[Traitorfish]

What if they wanted to be an axe murderer?

Wait, are we seriously comparing trans people to axe murders?

Anyway, yeah, I'd be cool with that. I'd make sure that they were certain before embarking on any medial treatment, but, honestly, I'd prefer to start such treatment before puberty. It's produces more effective results in the long run, and would make the child's life so much easier.

I very much disagree with the idea that skirts or high-heeled shoes are part of any viable gender-role. Unless "slave", "ho", or "blumenstrauß" are viable genders.
So i'd probably discourage a daughter from wearing a dress in school in the first place.

The whole clothing-as-gender-presentation thing gets very complex very fast when discussing trans issues, because of the particular difficulties they encounter. Trans people often adopt very traditional presentations, because, firstly, they wish to be more successfully read as their actual gender, and, secondly, because many opposite-gender trans people identify specifically with feminine womanhood or masculine manhood- those whose identification is less strong often preferring a genderqueer identity- and so find that traditional dress most effectively communicates their own identity. On top of that, there's the fact that many newly-transitioned trans people are insecure in their expression, and so may adopt a very traditional presentation because their lack of socialisation in that gender makes it hard for them to adopt a more natural expression, so you will find that trans people often adopt a less traditional presentation over time.

Once they are a teenager, I'd agree you can't force them to get help. Strongly encourage it, but don't force them.

"Get help"? In what sense? Do remember that transgenderedness is not a mental illness, Domination.

 

[El_Machinae]

It's not about doing "girly" things which is a social construct. It's about wanting to biologically be a girl.

Young Female Chimps Treat Sticks as Dolls

I don't know how much is socialisation or how much is innate.

I would discourage any child from wanting any form of body changing surgery. Whether it's a girl wanting cosmetic surgery on her face or a child wanting a sex change. I just think there are too many risks involved.

Encourage them to deal with their sexuality and take a long time before making any decisions.

The Netherlands (and others) consider using puberty-delaying drugs if the teens are having trouble. This delays sexualisation, which makes 'transing' easier, but also buys them time to decide. I thought it was a really good idea.

http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn16211-delaying-puberty-could-help-genderconfused-teens-.html

 

[useless]

If my child was transgendered, I would support her (her in this situation) all the way.

 

[Communisto]

id make it their 18th birthday present

 

[Traitorfish]

Young Female Chimps Treat Sticks as Dolls

I don't know how much is socialisation or how much is innate.

The key sentence in that, I think, is "Young males engage in such behavior much less frequently". As with most gendered behaviour, there is as much variation within each
sex or gender as between them; what we can describe is tendencies of varying strengths, not essential natures.

id make it their 18th birthday present

Ideally, they'd begin transition much earlier; the human body loses much of its plasticity during puberty, and so transition will be much easier and more effective if hormonal treatment is begun before puberty. The development of bone structure, in particular, is greatly influenced by hormones, and the effects of puberty are, quite obviously, irreversible.

 

[GamezRule]

posting fail

 

[Mango Elephant]

I agree with Dommie. If they were really intent on it, than I'd get them a sex change. But if it is just a phase, I wouldn't worry about it.

 

[GamezRule]

You can't just get an 8 year old a sex change because he say's he want's it. He really is not capable of making that decision. And what if he changes his mind.

 

[Mango Elephant]

You can't just get an 8 year old a sex change because he say's he want's it. He really is not capable of making that decision. And what if he changes his mind.

Well, if it's just a phase than I wouldn't allow it, of course, but if it was like the guy in OP's story who never grew out of it than sure, he could do it!

I mean, I'm only 14 so my opinions will change later when i'm actually a parent, but right now go ahead!

 

[holy king]

what would you do if your boy wanted to be a dolphin?

 

[GhostWriter16]

"Get help"? In what sense? Do remember that transgenderedness is not a mental illness, Domination.

I would consider it to be a birth problem in a sense. Tendency to the opposite gender, while not controllable, is not right either. They should take male hormones.

 

[useless]

Wait what?

 

[Traitorfish]

You can't just get an 8 year old a sex change because he say's he want's it. He really is not capable of making that decision. And what if he changes his mind.

No, you can't get them a "sex change", in the sense of sex reassignment surgery, because it is impossible to do so safely until they have passed through puberty. All you can do at that age is decide, in broad terms, which puberty it is they experience.

I would consider it to be a birth problem in a sense. Tendency to the opposite gender, while not controllable, is not right either. They should take male hormones.

Firstly, why is it "not right"? What is "right", in this context?
Secondly, their problem is not a hormone deficiency. You need to educate yourself further about trans issues before making such proclamations.

 

[Behind The Mask]

what would you do if your boy wanted to be a dolphin?

Are you comparing transsexuals to dolphins!

For shame.

 

[Karalysia]

I wish I could find that Youtube video of that girl who used to be a boy, she had a great way of explaining it as "I was a boy in my body, but I was a girl in here" (points to head) she was like 8 or 9 too.