What would you ask a person who knew everything?

[Traitorfish]

"I think you ought to start coming to Temple with me"?

 

[Flying Pig]

Alas, many women in central Virginia are very religious.

I'd be surprised if many of those would latch onto a squaddie with quite the same level of aggression though! Poor man picked this girl up in a bar, and had one of those moments whereby you wake up the next morning and think 'did I really do that?' Unfortunately he'd brought the lady back to his own place, and spent most of the next week trying to get her unlatched - eventually settling on the pretence of extreme religion. Somehow, she fell for it.

 

[BornInCantaloup]

That would assume that the sum of all knowledge equals net pain, or burden, as you put it. You're a pessimist, I see.

Close
My assumptions would be that infinite knowledge equals infinite loneliness and deprival from hope (to distinguish from despair).
There also isn't room for the joys of discovery in such a condition. Is there room for any joy at all?

To quote demigod David Bowie (he should know about that condition ):

Spoiler :

"So much has gone
and little is new
And as the sparrow sings
Dawn chorus for
Someone else to hear
The Thinker sits alone growing older
And so bitter

"I gave them life
I gave them all
They drained my very soul
...dry
I crushed my heart
to ease their pains
No thought for me remains there
Nothing can they spare
What of me?
Who praised their efforts
to be free?
Words of strength and care
and sympathy
I opened doors
that would have blocked their way
I braved their cause to guide,
for little pay."

From Cygnet Committee. 1969, Space Oddity album. Great, great song.

 

[warpus]

Close
My assumptions would be that infinite knowledge equals infinite loneliness and deprival from hope (to distinguish from despair).[/SPOILER]

Why do you conclude that? My conclusions would be exactly the opposite - to have infinite knowledge would mean an intricate understanding of the Universe and everything within. What joy!

 

[Terxpahseyton]

"How is it that you know everything"?

 

[madviking]

"How do you know that you know everything?"

 

[Valka D'Ur]

1. Can you give me 12 kegs of beer?
2. Whats the best way to pick up chicks?
3. Whats the best way to get out of a realtionship with a chick you cant stand anymore?
4. What are the stock makret records for 1 decade after this today.
5. How do I sieze power in the United States, Germany, France, China, India, Russia, and Brazil all simultaneously and merge them into one nation under my direct rule.
6. Where is the worlds nuclear asrenals and all of there launch codes.
7. What would I have to do to have you give me every answer I ever want for the rest of my life?
8. How can I have eternal youth and life?
9. How can I a massive starfleet and conquer the solar system?
10. What do I have to do to make every human being loyal to a dictatorship ruled by me and me alone?

1. "I could, but why should I?"

2. "Go into the chicken run, gently cup your hand around one of the little fluffy, yellow baby chickens, and stand up while holding it. Beware of angry hens wanting their baby back NOW. Treat the chick gently, not harming it. Then gently put it back down on the ground and carefully exit the chicken run. Don't forget to close the gate behind you."

3. "Stay out of the chicken run until the chick you can't stand has grown up to be of a sufficient size and age to make a decent meal. Humanely render the chicken dead (as painlessly as possible). Pluck the carcass, clean it, and then prepare it to your preference (roasting, barbecuing, boiling, baking, etc.). It will never bother you again, unless you don't know how to cook it properly and end up with some kind of stomach ailment."

4. "Why would you want to know that?"

5. "First you find yourself a really incompetent set of opponents. Then you set a mutually-agreeable time and place to set up your Risk board..."

6. "Why would you want to know that?"

7. "This is not possible, unless you only want 3 more answers. A deal is a deal, and your total limit is 10. You've used up 7."

8. "You should have arranged to have been born Immortal. Then, when you die a violent death as an infant (in any manner save that of being beheaded), you become Immortal. Voila, eternal youth and eternal life."

9. "Why would you want to know that?"

10. "Why would you want to know that?"


Moral of the story: Just because an omniscient person knows everything, never assume that individual would tell you what you want to know!

 

[ceaser1345]

1. "I could, but why should I?"

2. "Go into the chicken run, gently cup your hand around one of the little fluffy, yellow baby chickens, and stand up while holding it. Beware of angry hens wanting their baby back NOW. Treat the chick gently, not harming it. Then gently put it back down on the ground and carefully exit the chicken run. Don't forget to close the gate behind you."

3. "Stay out of the chicken run until the chick you can't stand has grown up to be of a sufficient size and age to make a decent meal. Humanely render the chicken dead (as painlessly as possible). Pluck the carcass, clean it, and then prepare it to your preference (roasting, barbecuing, boiling, baking, etc.). It will never bother you again, unless you don't know how to cook it properly and end up with some kind of stomach ailment."

4. "Why would you want to know that?"

5. "First you find yourself a really incompetent set of opponents. Then you set a mutually-agreeable time and place to set up your Risk board..."

6. "Why would you want to know that?"

7. "This is not possible, unless you only want 3 more answers. A deal is a deal, and your total limit is 10. You've used up 7."

8. "You should have arranged to have been born Immortal. Then, when you die a violent death as an infant (in any manner save that of being beheaded), you become Immortal. Voila, eternal youth and eternal life."

9. "Why would you want to know that?"

10. "Why would you want to know that?"


Moral of the story: Just because an omniscient person knows everything, never assume that individual would tell you what you want to know!

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Thank you, sir!

As I was reading the questions, I was reminded of the Dungeons & Dragons games where players are sometimes granted wishes. A good Dungeon Master/Mistress will always try to find a way to grant the wish in a way that doesn't upset the balance of the game (and teaches the players to be very careful in how they construct their wishes). Sometimes this can lead to some pretty funny results.

 

[Millman]

In no particular order.

1. Do you care what order I ask you the/my questions?

2. Is it possible to know everything without knowing it?

3. What is the origin of anything/nothing?

4. Is deceiving oneself humanities/life's greatest flaw?

5. At what point did I/others lose, die, fail?

Sorry if I repeated anyone's.

 

[Traitorfish]

What would you ask a person who knew everything?

"man, what even"

 

[Mechanicalsalvation]

Shoot them through the head with an anti-tank missile while they are asleep.

I dont think there is such person except what we are used to call God and in that case there is no need to ask anything as he will already know whats the question.

 

[Mechanicalsalvation]

"How is it that you know everything"?

Because I am everything?

In no particular order.

1. Do you care what order I ask you the/my questions?

Dont be silly...

2. Is it possible to know everything without knowing it?

Nothing is impossible.

3. What is the origin of anything/nothing?

You are not ready yet...

4. Is deceiving oneself humanities/life's greatest flaw?

No its actually pretty good fun.

5. At what point did I/others lose, die, fail?

There is no such thing as loss, death or failure. You lose only to gain, fail to grow and die to be more alive.

 

[Souron]

I'd start with "What is the theory of everything?" ie how does the univerce work? I'd make sure I had a taperecorder for the answer. Now I have to assume that the all knowing being spoke the same language, and therefore would be limmited to conveying things in terms of words I already know. However, I would want the most susinct explanation given those constrains -- there's no need to explain the nature of quantum particles since there's a word for that, but there would be need to explain any new concepts in detail because the susinct words for them don't exist yet. Therefor the explanation would take a finite amount of time, and every second would be worthwile.

Next I would ask what imediate experiments could be done that would serve as evidence of some part of the theory of everything as being superior to the current scientific model.

Next I would ask what are the requirements on human innovation and engineering to establish the entirity of the theory of everything. What do we need to proove it all, to the extent that would make it a valid scientific theory.

I'll post more questions when I think how best to ask them.

 

[Josu]

Which are the numbers for tonight's EuroMillions' Jackpot? (£148,000,000 = 190,000,000€ aprox.)

Then I will pay someone to answer your questions

 

[dutchfire]

I'd start with "What is the theory of everything?" ie how does the univerce work? I'd make sure I had a taperecorder for the answer. Now I have to assume that the all knowing being spoke the same language, and therefore would be limmited to conveying things in terms of words I already know. However, I would want the most susinct explanation given those constrains -- there's no need to explain the nature of quantum particles since there's a word for that, but there would be need to explain any new concepts in detail because the susinct words for them don't exist yet. Therefor the explanation would take a finite amount of time, and every second would be worthwile.

Next I would ask what imediate experiments could be done that would serve as evidence of some part of the theory of everything as being superior to the current scientific model.

Next I would ask what are the requirements on human innovation and engineering to establish the entirity of the theory of everything. What do we need to proove it all, to the extent that would make it a valid scientific theory.

I'll post more questions when I think how best to ask them.

Maybe start with "Is there a theory of everything?"

 

[Souron]

Maybe start with "Is there a theory of everything?"

I have a hard time imagining how there could not be one, though like with quantum theory there are multiple equivelent and equally simple models. The univerce follows natural law, and theory explains the reason behind those laws. For any set of laws there must be at least one valid scientific theory to explain them.

 

[Global Skeptic]

I have a hard time imagining how there could not be one, though like with quantum theory there are multiple equivelent and equally simple models. The universe follows natural law, and theory explains the reason behind those laws. For any set of laws there must be at least one valid scientific theory to explain them.

How do you know the universe follows natural laws? What does it mean to differentiate between the universe and natural laws?

 

[Souron]

How do you know the universe follows natural laws? What does it mean to differentiate between the universe and natural laws?

I know the universe follows natural laws because I can name a few laws that the univerce follows. It's possible that those laws are more narrowly applicable than I believe them to be, but any such constraints would be laws themselves.

The difference between the universe and natural laws is that the universe is what is, and natural law is the pattern of behavior the univerce follows.

 

[Global Skeptic]

I know the universe follows natural laws because I can name a few laws that the univerce follows. It's possible that those laws are more narrowly applicable than I believe them to be, but any such constraints would be laws themselves.

The difference between the universe and natural laws is that the universe is what is, and natural law is the pattern of behavior the univerce follows.

I don't understand the differentiation??? How do you know that the laws of nature are different from the universe?