Would you spank your child?

[Winner]

Would you spank your child? Or give him a time out. Spanking has the atvantage of making your message loud and clear, while the time out is less abusive.

Occasional spank is WAAAAAY more effective than all the American-imported alternative punishments.

 

[Theige]

My kid won't be yelling in the movie theater or crying for candy in the supermarket. You can thank me then.

Spanking just makes those situations worse does it not? You want to calm the child down, and spanking would seem to do the opposite. I've dealt with small children before, and am very confident in my ability to control, or "fix," a child's behavior without spanking.

Spoiling a kid by not spanking them would make you a worse parent.

Not spanking your child is spoiling them?

 

[bigdog5994]

Spanking just makes those situations worse does it not? You want to calm the child down, and spanking would seem to do the opposite. I've dealt with small children before, and am very confident in my ability to control, or "fix," a child's behavior without spanking.

i think she means that her kid would be well behaved at all times because of her discipline

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

If my kid is anything like me, he'll need a good deal of spanking to straighten him out.

 

[musekick]

Do you think the man who tamed Europe could not tame an insolent toddler?!

Perhaps, if your view of child care involves "taming" them. Kids are not wild animals to be tamed by fear into doing what you desire, nor, (in this specific Napoleon analogy), should they have to be "conquered".

I've baby-sat and taught Sunday School, so I'm around little kids all the time. I'm not sure how their parents discipline them at home, but you can bet if I just went around spanking them every time they were insolent to me I would be fired and probably reported. There are other forms of control that are effective and do not involve violence. I've always personally seen it as a go-to for someone who doesn't have a strong enough will or enough imagination to do anything else.

 

[thekaje]

In all seriousness: what ARE the alternatives to spanking? I mean, I've been accused of having no imagination before, and I have never read a Harry Potter book.

If you are "very confident in your ability to control, or 'fix,' a child's behavior without spanking," I want to hear from you.

 

[Theige]

i think she means that her kid would be well behaved at all times because of her discipline

Well behaved children are not the direct result of spanking. Just as spanking is not the only way to discipline a child.

No reliable study has ever shown spanking to be a more effective way to improve a child's behavior over time.

 

[bigdog5994]

Well behaved children are not the direct result of spanking. Just as spanking is not the only way to discipline a child.

No reliable study has ever shown spanking to be a more effective way to discipline your child.

has there ever been a study?

 

[Theige]

has there ever been a study?

Many. Quote from a WSJ article I was just reading:

Spoiler :

What constitutes spanking in a family can vary widely. “For some parents, a spanking may consist of one slap on a child’s buttocks, whereas for others it involves repeated slaps,” according to a 2002 analysis by Elizabeth Gershoff, then at Columbia University. The review of 88 studies concluded that corporal punishment can get children to comply immediately, but that spanking was associated with negative behaviors in children over time. The outcome varied according to the severity of parents’ practices.

Spanking has its defenders. The conservative Family Research Council on its Web site says that the organization believes, “The right of parents to impose necessary discipline, including spanking, upon their children should not be infringed.”

Child-development experts generally oppose spanking. The American Academy of Pediatrics, in its policy on discipline, says, “Corporal punishment is of limited effectiveness and has potentially deleterious side effects,” and that spanking “has been associated with increased aggression” in children. The group says that other methods such as time outs and removal of privileges are more effective.

Recent research on the subject, done at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, looked at the disciplinary practices of 1,435 mothers and concluded that parents who spank are significantly more likely to also use more severe forms of punishment that the researchers defined as abusive, such as kicking, or hitting a child with an object somewhere other than on the buttocks.

http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2008/09/05/is-spanking-effective-for-discipline/

 

[thekaje]

I'm gonna lob this one back to the correlation-causation camp.

 

[bigdog5994]

Many. Quote from a WSJ article I was just reading:

Spoiler :

What constitutes spanking in a family can vary widely. “For some parents, a spanking may consist of one slap on a child’s buttocks, whereas for others it involves repeated slaps,” according to a 2002 analysis by Elizabeth Gershoff, then at Columbia University. The review of 88 studies concluded that corporal punishment can get children to comply immediately, but that spanking was associated with negative behaviors in children over time. The outcome varied according to the severity of parents’ practices.

Spanking has its defenders. The conservative Family Research Council on its Web site says that the organization believes, “The right of parents to impose necessary discipline, including spanking, upon their children should not be infringed.”

Child-development experts generally oppose spanking. The American Academy of Pediatrics, in its policy on discipline, says, “Corporal punishment is of limited effectiveness and has potentially deleterious side effects,” and that spanking “has been associated with increased aggression” in children. The group says that other methods such as time outs and removal of privileges are more effective.

Recent research on the subject, done at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, looked at the disciplinary practices of 1,435 mothers and concluded that parents who spank are significantly more likely to also use more severe forms of punishment that the researchers defined as abusive, such as kicking, or hitting a child with an object somewhere other than on the buttocks.

http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2008/09/05/is-spanking-effective-for-discipline/

i agree with most of what this article has to say. Especially this part

In a video on the university’s Web site, lead researcher Adam J. Zolotor, assistant professor at UNC’s School of Medicine, says that eventually, spanking stops working because children no longer care if they get spanked – a phenomenon known as “extinction.”

i know plenty of kids that have been spanked so often that it does not affect them any more

but i know for a fact spanking can be used as a great deterrent for bad behavior. it kept me straight

 

[Mise]

but i know for a fact spanking can be used as a great deterrent for bad behavior. it kept me straight

Right, but other methods might have been even more effective. Or, perhaps, they are just as effective, but less harmful to your development (yes, you grew up just fine, but perhaps you could have grown up even better).

Point being, spanking may be an effective tool, but is it the best tool? Is it the right tool? Apparently, Child Development experts don't think so.

 

[Theige]

but i know for a fact spanking can be used as a great deterrent for bad behavior. it kept me straight

empirical studies > anecdotes

 

[bigdog5994]

empirical studies > anecdotes

ill use my own anecdotes over empirical studies (that can be found to be completely false) to raise my kids

@Mise: you wish you were as perfect as me!!!!

 

[Bill3000]

ill use my own anecdotes over empirical studies (that can be found to be completely false) to raise my kids

Your anecdotes can be completely false, too.

I wonder if Igloodude was spanked as a child....

 

[bhsup]

I was spanked plenty of times when it was warranted. I am not some psychopathic killer or maladjusted or hateful or negative. I'm a pretty happy go lucky guy overall.

 

[bigdog5994]

Your anecdotes can be completely false, too.

nah, im always correct when it comes to my kids

 

[Akka]

I've got the feeling that some people confuse "using spanking when necessary" with "spanking children as many times as you can".

I've been spanked when I behaved bad. In the ten years during which it happened, it happened less than what you can count on one hand (I remember two times myself, maybe three).
If you really believe that a slap on the butt once every three years is going to damage a mind, you may be much closer to be mentally damaged than the poor children being spanked.

Spanking the children so often that he becomes desensitivized is something else entirely.

 

[Theige]

I've got the feeling that some people confuse "using spanking when necessary" with "spanking children as many times as you can".

I've been spanked when I behaved bad. In the ten years during which it happened, it happened less than what you can count on one hand (I remember two times myself, maybe three).
If you really believe that a slap on the butt once every three years is going to damage a mind, you may be much closer to be mentally damaged than the poor children being spanked.

Spanking the children so often that he becomes desensitivized is something else entirely.

2 or 3 times in 10 years is basically none at all. Which means your parents used more effective methods the vast majority of the time

 

[Zebra 9]

Spank all the way. I was spanked maybe ten times. My parents tried timeouts, and it was a flop. Honestly I didn't care if I had to sit in the corner just so long as what I did paid off. Privileges!!! Gosh, I can't remember how many times I got grounded. I just know that I always found a way around it. I became a computer wiz by working around my parent's attempts to restrict computer privileges. The spankings though, just the mention would get me to obey. I think if my parents had used the "rod of correction" a tad more ( or the threat ) I probably would have been more obedient.

I don't got any kids but if I ever do I'll be spankin' on occasion. Of course not all the time cuz training has a lot to do with it. My mom runs a daycare and most of the kids wouldn't know a spankin' if they saw one but they are pretty good. The problem I see is that these kids don't listen very well when they are bad and they tend to repeat the crime again in the not so distant future regardless of which "alternative" punishment is employed. The training is there but proper enforcement is not employed.