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excuses racists use (particularly with dating)

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by caketastydelish, Apr 2, 2015.

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  1. BvBPL

    BvBPL Pour Decision Maker

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    It is only racist if they say it.

    So if they make up an lie and say "I wouldn't date you because I am still getting over my last relationship," or if they just don't call you then it isn't racist.

    Giving voice to one's preferences makes suddenly changes the equation.
     
  2. Narz

    Narz keeping it real

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    I don't think anyone's saying you're a monster.

    Plenty of people are shallow, not gonna like you or both (some people even don't like me :eek::eek::eek: ), what can you do. Let 'em screw their white boys & find someone who loves you for you. Plenty of white girls like exotic guys. I knew a tall, hot, fit, yoga-addicted blonde chick who almost always dated Asian men.
     
  3. Commodore

    Commodore Deity

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    I read your OP just fine. You were rejected by a white woman because you weren't white. I get that. I also get that it probably stings quite a bit to be rejected because of your race. But that does not mean you get to advocate for shaming a person for rejecting you romantically because you don't meet her racial preferences for a romantic partner. I happen to be of the belief that one can be as racist or otherwise discriminatory as they want when it comes to matters solely involving their personal life. Why? Because a personal life is just that, personal. One's personal life should not be forcibly influenced by any political or social agenda, no matter how 'noble' that agenda may seem.
     
  4. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    Right... hence why I'm specifically complaining about girls who explicitly go out of their way to mention race during a rejection. I honestly am baffled that this is so hard to understand, although since white guys (99% of this forum) are rejected based off race on a frequency far less than any other, that possibly explains why you simply cannot believe (or understand) the extent to which this actually happens.
     
  5. Commodore

    Commodore Deity

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    Please stop insulting the intelligence of this entire forum. We understand what you are saying perfectly fine. It's just that this "issue" isn't really an issue at all. If a woman wants to reject you because of your race that is her prerogative and you have absolutely zero basis or justification to "call her out" on it. And if they are honest with you and tell you it's because of your race, that's actually a good thing in my opinion. I don't know about you, but I can tolerate a racist much more than I can tolerate a liar.
     
  6. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    That's a good point. They may be racist idiots, but at least honest ones. Take what you can get. :)

    And with that, I request this thread be locked, I was the idiot this whole time. I apologize for criticizing racists for being racist.

    edit: To be more specific, it's that this "I'm not racist but".... "racist" nonsense. You know, they center of gravity is so skewed that they don't even *realize* what they're saying is actually racist. That's the real problem here, and really says something doesn't it? But never mind. This thread obviously didn't work out. No one wants to admit they're racist, even while saying a racist thing, and they *genuinely* don't believe they're racist for an actively racist belief, because they think anything short of "kill all blacks" can't be racist.
     
  7. JollyRoger

    JollyRoger Slippin' Jimmy Supporter

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    How about addressing the ageist point then. Let's say eight 80 year olds responded to your profile. How many would you consider dating? Is there a common reason you would reject them all? Does that make you an ageist or just exercising your preference in a romantic partner?
     
  8. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    I am openly ageist but not racist... particularly because age has an actual biological difference on people which race doesn't.

    edit: Again. If a professional sports team didn't allow blacks there would probably be an uproar, if they didn't allow 80 year olds, probably not.
     
  9. Commodore

    Commodore Deity

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    But why should that matter? The woman/women who rejected you did so because you weren't white and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. That is their preference, and regardless of the reason, you need to respect that preference. They are not violating your rights in any way by rejecting you because of the color of your skin, but you are violating their rights if you choose to confront them about it.
     
  10. plarq

    plarq Crazy forever

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    If you allow older woman in your life, you will be labelled cougar hunters. Anyway, discrimination is everywhere.
     
  11. JollyRoger

    JollyRoger Slippin' Jimmy Supporter

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    If the Seahawks roster was all women, you would be in an uproar.
     
  12. _random_

    _random_ Jewel Runner

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    I feel like age is more of a factor in dating because it's often indicative of general maturity and common experience/place in life. Not that there are no exceptions there or that I would never make one, but I generally feel like ageism, if you want to call it that, is probably more justifiable than racism in this arena. And I'm inclined to agree that a moratorium on dating people of a certain race is kind of racist. Occasionally I'll call out girls on dating sites who are very insistent that they only date white men for being racist. And I'm white. Maybe I've wasted some opportunities there, but I feel like I wouldn't get along with people like that, you know?
     
  13. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    Yes, a persons gender has a biological difference which race doesn't... men are physically stronger than women, but whites/blacks are no stronger than each other.
     
  14. Commodore

    Commodore Deity

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    I'm pretty sure we all agree with that statement, but....your point?
     
  15. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    So "I bet you'd be mad if your favorite team had women in a physically demanding sport in a male dominated league, hypocrite haahaha!" is stupid thing to say.
     
  16. JollyRoger

    JollyRoger Slippin' Jimmy Supporter

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    Then explain the racial makeup of the typical football roster.
     
  17. Commodore

    Commodore Deity

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    Ah, you hadn't quoted that post yet when I responded. Now it makes a lot more sense.
     
  18. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    Cultural factors, and honestly I wouldn't be surprised if there's some amount of racism there to, although in a more discrete way.

    American culture tells black men that they can't make it in the corporate world (and the corporate world itself actively discriminates against black men), and thus they feel that things like either the NFL, NBA or rapping is their only way of "making" it. There is simply a smaller pool of whites playing football even at the highschool level, thus there are also going to be less of them making it to the top. Whites are probably less interested in things like football, basketball, etc because they aren't systematically oppressed in other parts of society (whereas blacks are), thus they don't feel the need to work their butt of to be the best football or basketball player while growing up as a kid.

    On the other hand even *then* we make sure the best positions are given to whites, just as we do in so many other areas of society. The team may mostly be black but the Owner, the Coach and even the Quarterback is almost always white.
     
  19. JollyRoger

    JollyRoger Slippin' Jimmy Supporter

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    So blacks excel not because they are stronger but excel because of racewide misperceptions about the number of corporate jobs available? What is your explanation for the lack of those of East African descent playing in the NFL?
     
  20. caketastydelish

    caketastydelish Deity

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    ... because football is almost exclusively played by Americans, and there are hardly any Americans of eastern African descent? The vast majority of black America descends of black slaves, which come from western Africa.
     
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