Random Rants 76: Argh! Augh! Ahhh!

[Valka D'Ur]

Rant: When one of the nurses here heard that I've got these medical issues (a couple of really serious ones going on simultaneously), she decided that nope, living on my own in my own apartment was too much for me, and said, "You should move to an assisted living facility."

Then she suggested one that's so obsessively in tune with "Christian values" that they won't even let people who have already been approved for MAiD (Medical Assistance in Dying) meet with counselors or their own doctors on the home's premises; there are news photos of people having to do paperwork outside across the street, on the sidewalk, in a bus shelter, etc. (not that I plan to apply for that, but it's a pretty good indication that it's absolutely the worst possible match for someone like me).

I told her that nope, that's not an option.

 

[Phrossack]

Rant: I'm trying to read an academic article. It's probably not long and was published fifty years ago by a man who died thirty-five years ago.

It's locked away from human knowledge by a paywall of forty dollars when barely a double-digit number of people have probably ever wanted to read it!

 

[Zkribbler]

It's locked away from human knowledge by a paywall of forty dollars when barely a double-digit number of people have probably ever wanted to read it!

Might it not be in multiple internet sites, e.g. Avarice Education, the University of Unicorns and Free Stuff, and the Estate of Dr, Hans Boringguy.?

 

[Phrossack]

Might it not be in multiple internet sites, e.g. Avarice Education, the University of Unicorns and Free Stuff, and the Estate of Dr, Hans Boringguy.?

Not sure whether you're implying it's greedy of them to hoard it, or unreasonable of me to want to read it without so high a paywall, but it's stored on a single site like the sole bridge across the river being guarded by a troll who didn't even build it

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Late last year I turned on the hype beast to get my friend a job. He is the perfect fit and really happy at my company and I knew that would be the case and went a over and beyond to make sure he got the job.

I found out today that he has been in months-long negotiations with another company for a job and he accepted it this morning.

This came on top of one of the most challenging work months in my career and I'm kind of at a breaking point. I really don't know what to do. Well, there is nothing I can do about my friend except play damage control to make sure everyone knows I had no clue he was going to do this. But for my own issues, I feel like my back is against the wall. I wake up every morning enraged and hating a job I loved just a month ago.

 

[Birdjaguar]

Late last year I turned on the hype beast to get my friend a job. He is the perfect fit and really happy at my company and I knew that would be the case and went a over and beyond to make sure he got the job.

I found out today that he has been in months-long negotiations with another company for a job and he accepted it this morning.

This came on top of one of the most challenging work months in my career and I'm kind of at a breaking point. I really don't know what to do. Well, there is nothing I can do about my friend except play damage control to make sure everyone knows I had no clue he was going to do this. But for my own issues, I feel like my back is against the wall. I wake up every morning enraged and hating a job I loved just a month ago.

You should try to isolate the most troublesome aspects so they can be handled without disturbing the other aspects of your work. Trouble spots can be: individual people, projects, HR, decisions you don't like, working conditions, etc.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Working conditions is I guess how I would sum it up. I have gotten the strong impression that I will not get what I want under any circumstances due to some tricky dynamics. I did realize today that my boss has no clue how miserable I am which I found odd as I wear my heart on my sleeve and telegraph how I'm feeling quite clearly. Then I realized of course he doesn't know, he has never had a single conversation with me that went beyond him ordering me to do something (which isn't actually something I take issue with - he's busy as hell).

So on the one hand I feel I owe him a conversation to let him know how miserable I am. On the other hand, there are a multitude of ways that me laying out my issues could backfire on me and make things substantially worse. And I do not want to go over his head either as that generally isn't a good idea imo.

In any case, all of this has not affected my actual work output, believe it or not. While I'm pissed, I feel strongly that I have to continue doing my best right until I walk out the door.

 

[Birdjaguar]

Dig deeper and identify which working conditions are the problem. Working conditions is too vague. Is it particular people; dirty conditions, team members stuff, politics (who?) money, etc. You don't want to open up about it until you know the specifics of what is the problem. The detail enables you to work through possible solutions.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

Oh no I know exactly what the issues are, I just don't want to lay it all out in public here. And this isn't related to my earlier rant about our cancelled holidays though that doesn't help.

And I have solutions but they aren't palatable due to the tricky dynamics.

 

[Birdjaguar]

List them and then add several solutions for each. then who you need to talk to about each one to get a solution implemented. Create a map of where you are, the obstacles and who needs to be involved in the solutions. that way you might be abole to fix some on a small scale and not try to enact a one solution event.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

I'll shoot you a pm if you're interested in the full story.

Anyways, I'm really bummed about my friend and I wish he had told me. I hold 0 grudges over it and in fact it was the best thing for him to do. I just wish he had given me some heads up though I guess perhaps he didn't trust me. I don't know. That's his business I guess. I just....man I really swung for the fences for him and would have appreciated a warning.

 

[Birdjaguar]

Sure.

 

[Birdjaguar]

Back in a bit.

 

[hobbsyoyo]

I honestly do not expect a reply to what I wrote. It was a lot to unpack and though I tried to aggressively edit it, it was a wall of text. I do feel substantially better just having written it all out though, so I thank you for that.

Edit:

me irl rn:

 

[shadowplay]

Getting Walmart ads in Chinese now. Good guess, Google!

At least they've stopped trying to sell me Polish women.

 

[Synobun]

Getting Walmart ads in Chinese now. Good guess, Google!

It's the revenge China promised after the Huawei debacle.

 

[Takhisis]

If I were the GM of this RL game I'd give hobbsyoyo a level-up for that Star Wars reference.

Rant: When one of the nurses here heard that I've got these medical issues (a couple of really serious ones going on simultaneously), she decided that nope, living on my own in my own apartment was too much for me, and said, "You should move to an assisted living facility."

Then she suggested one that's so obsessively in tune with "Christian values" that they won't even let people who have already been approved for MAiD (Medical Assistance in Dying) meet with counselors or their own doctors on the home's premises; there are news photos of people having to do paperwork outside across the street, on the sidewalk, in a bus shelter, etc. (not that I plan to apply for that, but it's a pretty good indication that it's absolutely the worst possible match for someone like me).

I told her that nope, that's not an option.

She's being insensitive to the point of rudeness. I don't know how assisted living facilities are in Canada, but don't discard them (or the hospital) because of the nurse.

Just allow for her being overly (and insultingly ) helpful. One of the worse things to do while in hospital is to get into fights with the staff.

Edit: see below.

 

[cardgame]

Anyways, I'm really bummed about my friend and I wish he had told me. I hold 0 grudges over it and in fact it was the best thing for him to do.

Since you mentioned you're not happy where you are right now, maybe your friend can pay you back by doing the same thing you did for them and getting you hired on somewhere else.

 

[Synobun]

Just allow for her being overly (and insultingly ) helpful. One of the worse things to do while in hospital is to get into fights with the staff.

This is bad advice.

 

[Takhisis]

Thanks for spotting it. I'd better clarify, since I was having trouble with the post (page clogged).

‘Allow’ in the sense of ‘not letting her get to you’. I was about to add the suggestion that you report her, because she is neglecting her duty.